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Getting out would be better. Just pack up his few things and move out. Certainly with the housing situation there, he could find a pretty cheap rental house or room. Even possibly buy one, housing has not been cheaper in decades. In the Detroit area, houses are selling for under $10,000. There has to be some pretty cheap rent out there.
Otherwise there are domestic abuse shelters which are also for men. Some want a small payment and since he's working, that shouldn't be too tough to do.
I think since she has already mentioned a gun, it's time not to mess around anymore. Calling the police on her really could get him in jail, it becomes a he said - she said and a young man up against a poor fragile elderly woman -- they'll put him in jail. He can get out and get a protective order however to keep her from showing up where he works and making a scene and interfering with his workplace.
"Poor fragile elderly woman?...." HAHAHA, She's only 56, but she's still poor (as in skinny), and still has a helluva lotta spunk......
Location: Went around the corner & now I'm lost!!!!
1,544 posts, read 3,599,940 times
Reputation: 1243
Why not go to a truck driver's training course? Get your CDL and get out of there and do some over the road or local truck driving? Next buy a van, convert it into living space and live in that for several years as you save your money while living in a totally different state AWAY from them.
Why not go to a truck driver's training course? Get your CDL and get out of there and do some over the road or local truck driving? Next buy a van, convert it into living space and live in that for several years as you save your money while living in a totally different state AWAY from them.
It's looking like im going to have to do that, once i get my financial aid for books and stuff, since housing is SO expensive in Michigan. People charge astronomical fees to even RENT a room.
Location: Went around the corner & now I'm lost!!!!
1,544 posts, read 3,599,940 times
Reputation: 1243
Quote:
Originally Posted by Trell B
It's looking like im going to have to do that, once i get my financial aid for books and stuff, since housing is SO expensive in Michigan. People charge astronomical fees to even RENT a room.
Getting the CDL is quick and your off making money. Go to cheaprvliving.com and see the different housing arrangment people have done. One guy on there bought a bluish green van for 2K and converted into the best living space for a couple of $100. It is the been looking van I have ever seen with tiolet included...check it out...do it and MOVE OUT
To the OP: Do you have friends away from your vicinity that you could stay with for a little while so that you can consider all the great options you were given in this thread? I mean, even the military is better than what you're exposed to right now. A little counseling would certainly be helpful, too, but you don't have time for it in your current situation. You need to stay as healthy mentally as you can before they do further damage. Because the problem is ALL them. I'm sure they love you but they can't show it because their issues are much deeper than you can handle ~ and you can't fix it. So whatever choice you make has to be away from them.
To the OP: Do you have friends away from your vicinity that you could stay with for a little while so that you can consider all the great options you were given in this thread? I mean, even the military is better than what you're exposed to right now. A little counseling would certainly be helpful, too, but you don't have time for it in your current situation. You need to stay as healthy mentally as you can before they do further damage. Because the problem is ALL them. I'm sure they love you but they can't show it because their issues are much deeper than you can handle ~ and you can't fix it. So whatever choice you make has to be away from them.
I really don't have any friends at all. I will chat with others at work, but that's it. I can't risk being rejected again/possibby fired because of "Rumors" other people have heard (Some of her friends shop where I work). She ruined that for me. Anytime i have tried to date, My mother has ruined that as well. I have a bad rep around this city because of her.
I really don't have any friends at all. I will chat with others at work, but that's it. I can't risk being rejected again/possibby fired because of "Rumors" other people have heard (Some of her friends shop where I work). She ruined that for me. Anytime i have tried to date, My mother has ruined that as well. I have a bad rep around this city because of her.
I have a number for this place i am going to see about moving to.
The OP seems to like to put down suggestions with "I can't" or "I don't":
-- I don't do loans
-- I don't have a car
-- I can't join the military
-- I can't ride a bike
etc., etc.
These words should not be in your vocab. If you are truly desperate, stop finding ways that things won't can't or don't happen and just MOVE OUT. Many have suggested getting as many jobs as you can handle. Cut down on the video games and the hanging out at Target or McDonald's before your shift and use that time to pound the pavement, resume in hand, looking for something else that pays you money to be away from home.
When you are truly motivated, you will start finding creative ways to accomplish things instead of putting up excuses not to. You are starting to sound like a codependent. You may not be ready to move on yet.
^ This
There's a saying that life is 10% of what happens to you and 90% of your attitude toward it. (Or something like that). OP, the first thing you will need to do is focus on your goals and not let anyone or anything distract you.
And keep us posted here at C-D, we're rooting for you!
Im looking for a second job but no one is calling. I keep checking them and they give me teh same runaround. I beg target for more hours, they wont give it. Jobs are few here in Michigan, and all that is left are low wage. Yes target does direct deposit, BUT mom gets in the way. If i do that, she wall say im going behind her back and doing what i want to do, or im defying her. Its a no win. She always gets her way, no matter what. I have to leave.
I'm late to the party but HOW does she get in the way? There is no legal way she can. Go get direct deposit and do what you want with the money. Tell work to not speak with your Mother. Got to Al anon and learn how to overcome dealing with toxic parents. Find some roommates just get out. You have a great resource here for ideas and it looks like you are trying.
The narcissist abuse starts all over again, saying everything negative about me and how i'm working a "Schoolboy's Job" than it eventually escalates to physical abuse when i try to stand up for myself and explain to her there are few resources.. And then I'll end up on he streets anyway.
It's a never ending cycle that you guys are slowly but surely giving me the courage to end. Permanently.
It is what it is. Get over expecting anything but abuse. So she is abusive and you give her your money. You might as well keep it and get abused. What's the difference? Don't obey her just because she says so. Give her want you want. Tell her your hours are cut and you are going out job hunting when you leave the house.
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