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I agree! But then, I'm not your typical female as well (also never wanted kids---actually surprised myself by getting married). The games are ridiculous. And having to give expensive gifts is not my thing, especially if I never receive a thank you note for them.
I admit it: I was hurt at my job when, after participating in all these showers, I adopted my first cat (a big step for me---had never had a pet as an adult) and I wasn't given a kitty shower! I know my co-workers just didn't think that way, but it would have been so nice....
I just got inspired in another thread to start this. There have to be more women like me. There just have to be.
1. The registry. I don't like that getting married or having a baby requires a person to register for gifts, but no other occasions do. We get gifts for birthdays, graduations, Christmas, etc. But we don't get to register for those occasions.
What do you think an amazon wishlist is?
1.A. The people who violate the registry.
Agreed. That is lame.
1B. Babies-R-Us. Enough said there.
Really? What's wrong with BRU?
2. Why the need for a women-only party? When someone is getting married, that usually means TWO people are getting married, right? Why do we have to have a stupid girly-girl party for the bride? why not have a party (with presents) for both the bride and groom? Why this female version of the "sausage fest"?
Uh, it's called the engagement party. That's for both. Bridal shower/bachelor party/etc...those are just traditions.
3. The required Add-On gifts. It's not enough to buy a nice gift from the registry, but you're usually required to bring a "wishing well gift" or "baby basinette gift" too. This is a smaller gift that you buy, toss into a big pile, and don't get credit for having bought.
I have never in my life heard of that.
4. The Stupid Shower Rituals. These are usually in the catgories of games, the pass-around, and the ribbon-hat. For those of you who don't know (men, I guess), there are "games" they have to play at these things. It's usually some quiz or bingo game that has to do with how much you know about the guest of honor. Not fun. Far, far from fun.
Then when the guest of honor opens each gift, you all have to pass the gift around and pretend to look at it. Sometimes it's expected to "ooh" and "aah" as you do this. Example: "Ooooohhh, breast pump!" I usually go take a pee break.
Then every ribbon or bow, from every gift, gets gathered together by the designated most-annoying party guest and sculpted into a silly hat that the guest of honor must then wear for several pictures.
Again, never heard of the silly hat. I enjoy seeing the presents because I like basking in the happiness of someone and seeing all the creative and neat things people do.
5. The lack of alcohol.
I don't know what showers you have been going to, but pretty much every one I have been to has had some booze.
.
See above in red.
Just an fyi, I am not a goo goo ga ga baby lover. And I was never one of those girls who dreamed of her wedding (or even thought about her wedding until 7 months before it happened - when I planned it).
If I love the person who is having the baby or getting married, I just love celebrating with them.
Babies-R-Us is the 10th circle of hell. It was unfortunately left out of Dante's Inferno due to an editing error. I'd rather plunge a fork into my right eye while getting a pap smear and root canal at the same time.
Wow, I never knew the amazon wish list was something to send to other people!?!
I just thought it's where I save stuff I plan to buy later.
To me, the "bachelorette party" is the equivalent of the bachelor party. The wedding shower is just stupid, and has no male equivalent.
Wait, do other people give a wedding shower gift OR a wedding gift (money) but not BOTH???? That's what you seem to be saying. Have I been unnecessarily double-gifting all these years? I usually get invited to the bridal shower and buy them a present from the registry list. Then when I go to the wedding, I give the wedding card with a check inside. Doesn't everyone else do that? Now I can be doubly tickled-off when I don't get two thank-you cards.
Too many baby showers I've had to go to were "dry" or only had punch or mimosa. The people who threw the dry showers said something about how they wanted everyone to be in solidarity with the expected mother, since she could not drink. I'm like, hey, I didn't stop taking MY pill! Why can't I drink? Maybe I need to get a nice silver flask....
Can I put that in my registry list?
Babies-R-Us is the 10th circle of hell. It was unfortunately left out of Dante's Inferno due to an editing error. I'd rather plunge a fork into my right eye while getting a pap smear and root canal at the same time.
Wow, I never knew the amazon wish list was something to send to other people!?!
I just thought it's where I save stuff I plan to buy later.
To me, the "bachelorette party" is the equivalent of the bachelor party. The wedding shower is just stupid, and has no male equivalent.
Wait, do other people give a wedding shower gift OR a wedding gift (money) but not BOTH???? That's what you seem to be saying. Have I been unnecessarily double-gifting all these years? I usually get invited to the bridal shower and buy them a present from the registry list. Then when I go to the wedding, I give the wedding card with a check inside. Doesn't everyone else do that? Now I can be doubly tickled-off when I don't get two thank-you cards.
Too many baby showers I've had to go to were "dry" or only had punch or mimosa. The people who threw the dry showers said something about how they wanted everyone to be in solidarity with the expected mother, since she could not drink. I'm like, hey, I didn't stop taking MY pill! Why can't I drink? Maybe I need to get a nice silver flask....
Can I put that in my registry list?
Wait, do other people give a wedding shower gift OR a wedding gift (money) but not BOTH???? That's what you seem to be saying. Have I been unnecessarily double-gifting all these years? I usually get invited to the bridal shower and buy them a present from the registry list. Then when I go to the wedding, I give the wedding card with a check inside. Doesn't everyone else do that? Now I can be doubly tickled-off when I don't get two thank-you cards.
Thinking back.
I usually buy one gift for the wedding off the registry and if I give a card after that, it only has the message that came with the card.
I can't recall anyone having a bridal party and then having a wedding registry. But I'd only buy ONE gift. There are limits.
[quote=TracySam;28845787]Babies-R-Us is the 10th circle of hell. It was unfortunately left out of Dante's Inferno due to an editing error. I'd rather plunge a fork into my right eye while getting a pap smear and root canal at the same time.
I usually buy one gift for the wedding off the registry and if I give a card after that, it only has the message that came with the card.
I can't recall anyone having a bridal party and then having a wedding registry. But I'd only buy ONE gift. There are limits.
Not sure what this means. What I meant is: the couple registers at some store. Someone throws a bridal shower, say, May 4th. I go to the shower May 4th with a rice-cooker from the registry, plus "wishing well" add-on gifts. Bride gets rice cooker and presumably shares it with husband-to-be.
Then on say, June 15th, they have a wedding. I go to the wedding with an envelope. Inside the card is a check for $100-$300 depending on how close I am to the couple. I leave that on the gift table or toss it in the gift bag with the other envelopes.
I was always taught by my mom (see other threads about my strict etiquette "rules" I was raised with) that to bring a wrapped present to a wedding was just tacky. The presents are for the shower, and for the wedding itself, you bring a card with a monetary gift inside.
I always notice that most people at weddings have an envelope like me. But one or two oddballs have a big wrapped box with a blender or toaster or something that they leave on the gift table. So you're saying that if the person went to the shower a few months ago and gave a gift then, that the envelope they bring to the wedding just has a card in it?
I was always taught by my mom (see other threads about my strict etiquette "rules" I was raised with) that to bring a wrapped present to a wedding was just tacky. The presents are for the shower, and for the wedding itself, you bring a card with a moneary gift inside.
I agree with your mom about not bringing a gift to the wedding, but that the gift should be sent to the bride/bride's parents home before the wedding. I'm from a family where cash isn't a gift, a gift is a gift. A shower gift is supposed to be something smaller/less expensive, like a set of hand towels or a mixing bowl and some spoons, etc. That's all gone out by the wayside, since now people bring the big gifts from the registry to the shower.
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