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My 8 y/o son has a cousin about his age that is a girl. They were at her house recently and they were playing dress up.
I didn't think twice about that until a couple weeks later we were at Wal-Mart looking at boys clothes and he asked if he could look at girls clothes.
He said he just liked the way they looked and even was drawn to the girls underwear and socks.
I try to be open minded so next time we went and after a lengthy discussion I agreed he could get some girls socks and underwear since only he would know.
But that's were I drew the line since kids can be mean and I didn't want him going to school in a girls top.
Am I doing the right thing? I am a single mother and his father will see him about once a month, so he does have a male figure in his life. And if he grows up gay I will be disappointed, but I will still accept him just like I do now with this quirk that i hope he outgrows.
You sound like you are dealing with it the best you can. I have an 8 year old son too. He has stopped short of asking to WEAR girls clothes, but he seems to be somehow attracted to the sparkles and things. In preschool he used to play dress up at school and put a dress on. He wanted a pair of twinkle toes skechers shoes. I said no. Like you, my biggest concern would be the ridicule he'd get from the other kids. I really have no idea if you are doing the right thing or not. Was he satisfied with where you drew the line, at socks and underwear? What if he had something he could wear at home, but not at school?
Only he would know? And what if he unfortunately has a little accident at school (or wherever you are not with him), and is hurt, and needs to have his clothes taken off in front of other people to be taken care of because it's an emergency?
Its my understanding that you can't TURN your child gay. They are either ARE gay or they are NOT. Something that probably wont be clear for several more years...
Ok, I don't get it. I can see not letting him wear inappropriate clothes to school. But why can't he wear what he wants at home? What is this supposed relationship between clothes and being gay?
Your son needs to learn what the social norms are regarding clothing for men. This does not have anything to do with his eventual sexual orientation. There are certain social norms for males regarding clothing and he needs to learn those things as he grows up.
You probably cannot do anything about his sexual orientation. It is already determined. However, he needs to learn to look the way men look and men wear men's clothing. I have many gay friends and they wear regular men's clothing in public. One of my gay friends is a doctor. He needs to look like a doctor and dresses appropriately for work. His partner works in a law office. He also dresses appropriately for work. In order to function in the world your son needs to learn to look like a man.
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