Punishment - 9y old broke neighbor's car window (boys, playing, daughter)
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I would not have him repay the cost of the window, because accidents happen and expenses are incurred as part of living life. I would personally offer to repay for the cost of the window, but I don't think a 9 year old should worry about that.
Instead, the natural consequence is I would have my kid in charge of vacuuming up the debris caused by the broken window. Every last speak of broken glass.
I had a broken window once in my car. I vacuumed the asphalt. Again, and again, and again, and I kept finding glass. So, have him vacuum the driveway three or four times, and have him on his hands and knees looking for specs of broken glass. They can cut feet, and they need to be broken up, but it's really hard. Car window glass keeps shattering into smaller and smaller fragments.
After he vacuums multiple times and continues to find glass, he'll realize what a pain broken windows are.
I disagree. When you break something, you fix it. In this case, you pay for it. My kids are the same age and are saving their money for a tablet. To have to take that money and pay for the broken window would be the best kind of natural consequence.
When you break something, you fix it. In this case, you pay for it. My kids are the same age and are saving their money for a tablet. To have to take that money and pay for the broken window would be the best kind of natural consequence.
Why would you give a child a punishment with the best potential to injure himself--cleaning up broken glass? You really think having glass impaling and cutting his foot is acceptable? He might have to go to the doctor and have the glass removed from the laceration if it breaks while it is in his foot, which is real possibility, nevermind the possibility of it getting infected.....And common sense would tell you that if the rock went through the window, most of the shards would be in the car....?
In the real world you are expected to pay what you break. If you break something in Target, they aren't going to accept that "My son is only 9 years old" and "I'll clean it up if you don't charge me." These are real entitled attitudes present in this post.
Automotive glass is speciality glass that falls apart rather than creates lacerations, so there is not a safety hazard presented by vacuuming it up. The problem is the act of vacuuming it causes the automotive glass chunks to break into further and further smaller pieces. It takes a lot of work to get it all cleaned up.
Most of the glass chunks will be inside the vehicle, but since it's not the OP's vehicle, it's not the place of the OP's kid to clean the vehicle. If it was my vehicle, he would clean out my vehicle as well.
A couple more thoughts. Now, I don't have a 9 year old so perhaps my opinion will change later.
I think the concept of having him do chores to earn money to pay the neighbor is combining two concepts. The first is the concept that we have to work to earn money. The second concept is that if we break property of anothers, we must take responsibility by paying for cost of repairs for things we damage.
The important part of that is teaching our children to take responsibility. Watching Dad write out a check, putting it into an envelope, and walking over and giving it to the neighbor teaches that concept.
Cleaning up the broken glass also teaches that we must take responsibility for our actions. If we break something, we must clean up the mess.
The second half - doing chores to earn the money - is a separate concept that is not directly related to the incident. Doing the chores might make sense if the kid isn't getting that what happened is unfortunate and needs some time doing something he doesn't like to drive it home. But if he already is remorseful and feels bad, there may not be much need to punish him any further. Simply having helping Dad with delivering the check may be enought to drive that concept home.
A couple more thoughts. Now, I don't have a 9 year old so perhaps my opinion will change later.
I think the concept of having him do chores to earn money to pay the neighbor is combining two concepts. The first is the concept that we have to work to earn money. The second concept is that if we break property of anothers, we must take responsibility by paying for cost of repairs for things we damage.
The important part of that is teaching our children to take responsibility. Watching Dad write out a check, putting it into an envelope, and walking over and giving it to the neighbor teaches that concept.
Cleaning up the broken glass also teaches that we must take responsibility for our actions. If we break something, we must clean up the mess.
The second half - doing chores to earn the money - is a separate concept that is not directly related to the incident. Doing the chores might make sense if the kid isn't getting that what happened is unfortunate and needs some time doing something he doesn't like to drive it home. But if he already is remorseful and feels bad, there may not be much need to punish him any further. Simply having helping Dad with delivering the check may be enought to drive that concept home.
How does dad witing on a piece of paper and handing it to the neighbor teach him to take responsibility or the value of money/property? You ever asked a kid how parents use their debit cards? Mine thinks money magically comes from the bank to me, no matter how many times I explain it is MY money in the bank I'm using. Parents with children in that age group know that writing a check simply looks like it was wayyy easier to take care of then they thought. Doing chores to make up the money for it teaches them that it takes hard work to earn money, and to appreciate the value of property.
How does dad witing on a piece of paper and handing it to the neighbor teach him to take responsibility or the value of money/property?
When we break something, we write out a check to pay for it. Teaching your kid to that teaches the value of being responsible.
It does not teach the value of money/property.The value of money/property is a separate lesson that may or may not need to be taught, but can be handled separately.
A kid that does not understand the value of a checkbook needs to be taught the value of money, even if he/she never breaks anything in his life.
If this kid was full of bad intent and intentionally caused some havoc by breaking the window...I could see correcting him...As for this incident...Pay the neighbor...and forget it...and take the kid aside and have a walk and talk about being more careful...and explain what "care" is - that he has to think of other people and if his actions "might" cause some damage....
Why would you "punish" someone for something done unintentionally....There is a difference between a blatant crime and a simple thoughtless mistake.
The problem is the act of vacuuming it causes the automotive glass chunks to break into further and further smaller pieces. It takes a lot of work to get it all cleaned up.
So you suggest making more useless busywork for your child as a punishment that won't actually help replace the broken window and just further complicates the matter? The issues don't stop once the glass is cleaned up. In the real world, you're expected to pay for or replace something that you have broke in another person's possession. It's just common courtesy, and you probably realize that replacing a car window is expensive.
The idea that the father here insists his kid has ADHD is worrisome...perhaps the kid was overly stimulated by the stimulants?
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He might have to go to the doctor and have the glass removed from the laceration if it breaks while it is in his foot, which is real possibility, nevermind the possibility of it getting infected.....And common sense would tell you that if the rock went through the window, most of the shards would be in the car....? 
