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Why don't old parents foster kids instead of having their own? They have more life experience, better off financially, more prepared, more stable emotionally.....sounds like foster kids would be better off there rather than with the young, immature, poor, foolish young folks who just pop out babies.
You make a strong argument for not having kids young. Fostered or otherwise. Sounds like ANY child would be better off with an older parents.
Because there are millions of kids that are on this planet already that needs a home
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Why don't old parents foster kids instead of having their own? They have more life experience, better off financially, more prepared, more stable emotionally.....sounds like foster kids would be better off there rather than with the young, immature, poor, foolish young folks who just pop out babies.
Agreed, but the point of this thread is because people want to have as many babies before they are old so they can live life. My point is why not just foster a child so you do not have to worry about being too old to live. It sounds like these people just want to experience a child for some unknown reason on the other hand they want to "live" so they hate the fact that children are not hamsters so it takes longer for them to die.
It's becoming very clear that some in this thread think there is a right and wrong to this issue. How very ignorant. It should be illegal to have kids before you are 30?? People who plan to enjoy their EARLY retirement from active parenting think kids are hamsters?? People who have babies younger do so for some reason like needing to feel loved or being foolish or whatever. All because you know some irresponsible bimbo who got knocked up and doesn't have any maturity or good sense? You need to get out of your little strange world and meet some more people. You people need to get a clue.
No one here who has had kids younger is decrying the moms who choose to be such at an older age, do what you want....even though you are risking your health and the health of your child with later in life pregnancy, even though your knees crack when you carry your little one up the stairs and you're not limber enough to climb through the tunnels at chuckecheese, even though at the high school graduation you might be mistaken for a grandparent, even though you might be dead before your grandchildren will even remember you.
See, you can make it look as bleak as you want but still neither one is more right than the other.
ETA....I've also been wondering why it is more acceptable to travel and have fun, live it up, etc. BEFORE you have kids (and delay kids so you can do so) rather than to do those very same things AFTER your children are grown. When someone says they can't wait to be 46 with grown kids and still be young enough to travel, have fun, live it up, etc. that it is compared to waiting for your hamster to die (which was really an appalling comment).
It's becoming very clear that some in this thread think there is a right and wrong to this issue. How very ignorant. It should be illegal to have kids before you are 30?? People who plan to enjoy their EARLY retirement from active parenting think kids are hamsters?? People who have babies younger do so for some reason like needing to feel loved or being foolish or whatever. All because you know some irresponsible bimbo who got knocked up and doesn't have any maturity or good sense? You need to get out of your little strange world and meet some more people. You people need to get a clue.
It's becoming very clear that some in this thread think there is a right and wrong to this issue. How very ignorant. It should be illegal to have kids before you are 30?? People who plan to enjoy their EARLY retirement from active parenting think kids are hamsters?? People who have babies younger do so for some reason like needing to feel loved or being foolish or whatever. All because you know some irresponsible bimbo who got knocked up and doesn't have any maturity or good sense? You need to get out of your little strange world and meet some more people. You people need to get a clue.
No one here who has had kids younger is decrying the moms who choose to be such at an older age, do what you want....even though you are risking your health and the health of your child with later in life pregnancy, even though your knees crack when you carry your little one up the stairs and you're not limber enough to climb through the tunnels at chuckecheese, even though at the high school graduation you might be mistaken for a grandparent, even though you might be dead before your grandchildren will even remember you.
See, you can make it look as bleak as you want but still neither one is more right than the other.
ETA....I've also been wondering why it is more acceptable to travel and have fun, live it up, etc. BEFORE you have kids (and delay kids so you can do so) rather than to do those very same things AFTER your children are grown. When someone says they can't wait to be 46 with grown kids and still be young enough to travel, have fun, live it up, etc. that it is compared to waiting for your hamster to die (which was really an appalling comment).
You, yourself made a strong argument for older parents being better parents.
Sorry but setting a minimum age for parenthood would reduce welfare/WIC roles, child neglect and child abuse and increase our graduation rates. It would give adults time to get their financial house in order before having kids and to grow up themselves. There really isn't a bad side to not having kids young. There's no reason or advantage to having them young. Younger couples tend to struggle financially. The younger we are the more immature we tend to be. With 50% of marriages ending in divorce, waiting would mean fewer children put through divorces. And given that maternal education at time of birth is the biggest predictor of child outcomes, I'd think you'd want moms a little older so they can finish college first.
Waiting is a good thing. Sometimes we have to pass laws to make people do the good thing. We could use one here. 30's an exaggeration as there are many who are mature and established by their mid 20's so we could have a clause to take a parenting test that included a financial stability test.
There is no advantage to having children young. There are many to waiting. Educated moms make better moms and their kids turn out better. Kids do better when they live in a two parent household so waiting to make sure the marriage is going to work is a good thing. And growing up yourself before you have kids shouldn't be underrated.
When my kids were born has nothing to do with when I retire. It's not about my retirement. Anyone who's thinking that way about kids probably shouldn't have them. Either you want to make the investment in children or you don't. They're not pets or convenience items or accessories. They're people and we should be making darned sure we're up to the challenge of supporting and raising them and that, often, takes getting a little age under your belt.
You see far fewer cases of abuse in older parents. Fewer cases older parents on walfare/WIC. Older parents are more likely to be educated. They're more likely to be mature. There are lots of reasons to prefer older parents and none to prefer younger parents. Back when people died at 40, having kids at 20 made sense. It doesn't anymore. Now we have to see to our educations and establish careers before having kids to make sure we can care for them. That puts having kids into the late 20's, which is not a problem given we're now living to be 80 as a matter of routine.
It's becoming very clear that some in this thread think there is a right and wrong to this issue. How very ignorant. It should be illegal to have kids before you are 30?? People who plan to enjoy their EARLY retirement from active parenting think kids are hamsters?? People who have babies younger do so for some reason like needing to feel loved or being foolish or whatever. All because you know some irresponsible bimbo who got knocked up and doesn't have any maturity or good sense? You need to get out of your little strange world and meet some more people. You people need to get a clue.
No one here who has had kids younger is decrying the moms who choose to be such at an older age, do what you want....even though you are risking your health and the health of your child with later in life pregnancy, even though your knees crack when you carry your little one up the stairs and you're not limber enough to climb through the tunnels at chuckecheese, even though at the high school graduation you might be mistaken for a grandparent, even though you might be dead before your grandchildren will even remember you.
See, you can make it look as bleak as you want but still neither one is more right than the other.
ETA....I've also been wondering why it is more acceptable to travel and have fun, live it up, etc. BEFORE you have kids (and delay kids so you can do so) rather than to do those very same things AFTER your children are grown. When someone says they can't wait to be 46 with grown kids and still be young enough to travel, have fun, live it up, etc. that it is compared to waiting for your hamster to die (which was really an appalling comment).
I never said something was right or wrong. I never said what was acceptable or not.
I am trying to understand the logic of popping out kids early as possible so you can move on with your life. The majority of comments I have seen thus far have not said anything about being young enough to run around with their kids it was basically being young so when they are grown you can move on. That logic leads me to believe some are having kids not because they want to and it's a burden for them.
ETA....I've also been wondering why it is more acceptable to travel and have fun, live it up, etc. BEFORE you have kids (and delay kids so you can do so) rather than to do those very same things AFTER your children are grown. When someone says they can't wait to be 46 with grown kids and still be young enough to travel, have fun, live it up, etc. that it is compared to waiting for your hamster to die (which was really an appalling comment).
Because by then the kids are in college and are bleeding you dry for tuition, or popping out grandbabies and wanting you to babysit....
I never said something was right or wrong. I never said what was acceptable or not.
I am trying to understand the logic of popping out kids early as possible so you can move on with your life. The majority of comments I have seen thus far have not said anything about being young enough to run around with their kids it was basically being young so when they are grown you can move on. That logic leads me to believe some are having kids not because they want to and it's a burden for them.
I can't see having kids before you're grown up and stable enough to have them. People rushing to have kids is why so many kids are growing up with divorced parents. Their parents didn't wait long enough to see if the marriage would take. I can think of lots of reasons to wait and none to hurry.
My husband will be 66 and I'll be 54 when our youngest graduates from high school. Good thing I don't think having kids is about fitting them in around MY RETIREMENT, . I don't plan on retiring anyway. I hate the idea of sitting around waiting to die and I'm not rich enough to do the kinds of things I'd enjoy doing full time to keep me busy. So, I'll work until I die and take some really nice vacations in the meantime.
Seriously, young parents, (ie early 20's or younger) are often a problem. There's too often a self serving reason they decided to rush into having kids. Too often they really need to grow up but the kids are already here and, sadly, they tend to repeat the process in the next generation. I have a girl in my class whose mom will be a 32 year old grandmother this year . Like mother like daughter. Can't see where poppping them out young is going to help her or the baby.
I was 26 with #1 and 29 with #2 (We're not having anymore). DH and I will be in our mid-40s when they leave. We are the "young parents" at the preschool, surrounded by other parents who appear to be in their late 30s and into their 40s, with 2-4 year-old children. I think that's insane! I am all for having kids in your 20s; when I'm in my 50s, I can be young enough (and hopefully healthy enough) to enjoy my grandchildren AND my adult children.
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. Like mother like daughter. Can't see where poppping them out young is going to help her or the baby.
