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1. When I say No I Feel Guilty by Manuel J. Smith. A primer on assertiveness, how to stop being victimized by others who are just looking out for themselves at your expense.
2. The John C.H Wu translation of the Tao Teh Ching by Lao Tzu. There are numerous translations of the Tao Teh Ching but this one really gets to the essence. A realistic and practical view of existence and the mysteries of life, relationships, behaviour and perceptions.
I got the Tzu book on your recommendation but couldn't make any sense of it, despite all the great reviews, as well. I hate that obscurantist stuff, though it is doubtless some sort of failing on my part.
I think _Visions: How Science Will Revolutionize the 21st Century_ by Michio Kaku is a much better book. Kaku is not only a brilliant scientist and a great thinker, but a great writer, as well. Not as great as Russell, but great. And with important ideas.
Kaku's book is self-help in that it provides hope for the future of our species. He interviewed 150 scientists to write the book, so it's a very brilliant book, very beautifully written.
I got the Tzu book on your recommendation but couldn't make any sense of it, despite all the great reviews, as well. I hate that obscurantist stuff, though it is doubtless some sort of failing on my part.
I think _Visions: How Science Will Revolutionize the 21st Century_ by Michio Kaku is a much better book. Kaku is not only a brilliant scientist and a great thinker, but a great writer, as well. Not as great as Russell, but great. And with important ideas.
Kaku's book is self-help in that it provides hope for the future of our species. He interviewed 150 scientists to write the book, so it's a very brilliant book, very beautifully written.
Whew! I feel much better now...thought it was just me.
I gained an insight from a book about relationships (and divorce) - it is that a relationship is very much built on how you make your significant other feel - it isn't built as much on what your significant other sees in you or what personal characteristics of yours that he likes - the foundation is how you make him feel about himself!
(do not have title of the book handy) This piece of information gave me a lot of insight and helped me to understand what had occurred.
It was also startling and a bit thunder striking to see that love is not built as much on personal characteristics of your own and those he sees and likes in you, but instead on how you make him feel. (according to this philosophy)
I find this sort of disheartening on one hand in that you are not loved for yourself, but are loved more for how you make your significant other feel about himself.
Last edited by matisse12; 01-10-2018 at 03:26 PM..
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"I don't understand. But I don't care, so it works out."
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The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up by Marie Kondo. At a glance, this appears to be a how to organize your closets book, but it's the exact opposite. You won't be heading to the Container Store for attractive shelving - you'll be tossing your stuff in big bags for Goodwill or the trash. Each piece you own that doesn't bring you joy, you throw out. (This is somewhat impractical so you can't follow it all the way. No one gets joy from an ironing board but you still need it). As you say goodbye to the possessions that you feel negatively about - and there are so many reasons to feel negatively about possessions - your anxiety and sadness lift. It's amazing. Freeing. Although she is a bit of a nut. Who says goodbye and thank you to stuff? ;D
Dear Sugar by Cheryl Strayed. A compilation of her advice columns. From the author of "Wild, from Lost to Found on the Pacific Crest Trail", this is a profoundly moving book in the form of real questions from readers and her answers. Breath of lovely fresh air.
Games People Play by Eric Berne. Best book I've ever read by far.
The good thing was that it became easy to figure people out - the bad thing was that it made me impatient and ill-tempered towards them and their STUPID GAMES.
The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up by Marie Kondo. At a glance, this appears to be a how to organize your closets book, but it's the exact opposite. You won't be heading to the Container Store for attractive shelving - you'll be tossing your stuff in big bags for Goodwill or the trash. Each piece you own that doesn't bring you joy, you throw out. (This is somewhat impractical so you can't follow it all the way. No one gets joy from an ironing board but you still need it). As you say goodbye to the possessions that you feel negatively about - and there are so many reasons to feel negatively about possessions - your anxiety and sadness lift. It's amazing. Freeing. Although she is a bit of a nut. Who says goodbye and thank you to stuff? ;D
Dear Sugar by Cheryl Strayed. A compilation of her advice columns. From the author of "Wild, from Lost to Found on the Pacific Crest Trail", this is a profoundly moving book in the form of real questions from readers and her answers. Breath of lovely fresh air.
This is interesting. A friend of mine was experiencing constipation. She regularly talked to (and paid) a woman who was a sort of psychic healer/therapist. The woman told her she was constipated because she was holding onto things she should let go of. Not long after, she came across old letters and audio tapes from her first marriage, and she was still fighting with the ex even though she had remarried.
She looked at all the stuff she was hanging onto and decided to throw it all away. Then over the next two days, the constipation reversed and she felt better all around.
For me, it was Wayne Dyer's Power of Intention just riveted me and I dug deeper, from there it was onto Dale Carnegie, Napoleon Hill and Steven Covey. I got off the horse after doubling (one year quadrupling) my earnings. A positive attitude takes work and self discipline. But once you get the momentum, it gets easier. I'm due for a tune up to get back on track and was interested in this thread to help me get there.
Anything by Brene Brown is a worthwhile read if you want to gain a better understanding of vulnerability and resilience. Very approachable style, as well.
Her TED talks are outstanding, as well.
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