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Well as you said, many people especially those with childhood issues adopt dysfunctional coping mechanisms. Some are subtle, like the person who is unable to commit to a partner even though they want to, to people who drink or do drugs, to people who can only connect with others in a way such as this.
There just seems to be a bit of anger toward him, that I don't get.
I don't have any anger. I am calling BS on this 'condition' he says he 'can't help'. He is very sick and should seek help. He doesn't want to even try, he just wanted her to keep on this way. He was there to legitimize his 'condition' which as you admit, doesn't exist as one.
I don't have any anger. I am calling BS on this 'condition' he says he 'can't help'. He is very sick and should seek help. He doesn't want to even try, he just wanted her to keep on this way. He was there to legitimize his 'condition' which as you admit, doesn't exist as one.
I said it doesn't exist as a legal disorder, you're not going to get a diagnoses for it and collect disability for it. It doesn't mean he doesn't feel a compulsion to do it however. There are people who do all sorts of things in private and don't want help for them. There are judges and wall street execs who are going to relieve their stress tonight by paying a dominatrix to walk on them with spiked heels and call them derogatory names before they go home to their wives and kids. This man dresses like a baby and wants to be cared for like e baby. What is the big deal? This woman doesn't have any decisions to make that every other woman in the world hasn't had to make, "Do I stay or leave?". It is hard but no harder than deciding whether to end any relationship in which your needs aren't being met.
Why is it so important that he get help, if he is happy this way?
I said it doesn't exist as a legal disorder, you're not going to get a diagnoses for it and collect disability for it. It doesn't mean he doesn't feel a compulsion to do it however. There are people who do all sorts of things in private and don't want help for them. There are judges and wall street execs who are going to relieve their stress tonight by paying a dominatrix to walk on them with spiked heels and call them derogatory names before they go home to their wives and kids. This man dresses like a baby and wants to be cared for like e baby. What is the big deal? This woman doesn't have any decisions to make that every other woman in the world hasn't had to make, "Do I stay or leave?". It is hard but no harder than deciding whether to end any relationship in which your needs aren't being met.
Why is it so important that he get help, if he is happy this way?
Okay, then why are you upset that he won't get help?
Why do you have to read emotion that isn't there into an opinion? Are you mad at Dr. Phil too? Should he have said this is perfectly alright, good job?
As long as it's not causing harm, sure, each to his own. But this 'syndrome' seems to be an excuse to relieve oneself off all responsibilities & depend on others for support. Just an excuse to be a malingering bludger.
From what I saw, the guy used a lot of emotional manipulation to convince his gf to play along.
He didn't want a gf, but rather, a 'mummy' to support him & service his needs.
First when I saw it I was just speechless and couldn’t believe my eyeballs- then I couldn’t stop laughing At the utter ridiculousness of it, straight absurd.
I really just.cant.believe. it.
A grown a** man, telling Dr Phil that he has a “adult baby disorder” that causes him for blah blah reasons to have to “live like a baby, complete with a custom made high chair, crib, toys, bottle and custom made “baby clothes and jammies “
and a girlfriend who I’m not sure which one is the sicker one of the two because his girlfriend obliges his “need to be a giant baby” and with a straight face reports most of her money is spent on his baby clothes, toys, etc
He is apparently not even embarrassed to sit there on national tv as if he is discussing his college program, that he’s indeed, he spends life laying in his adult size “crib” and drinking his bottle.
Then mentions he sometimes in his high chair will throw his food or have
tantrums. His girlfriend spoon feeds him his baby food while he says “no no, mama, waahhhh!!” bangs on tray for more baby food.
I’m just, wow, what? Is this for real? I didn’t hear him mention any family
Members but I have to wonder what his family would say. “well he always was a crybaby?”
Literally?
One person said no, it’s just a man who doesn’t want to work.
Good God, my dad is rolling over in his grave- adult baby man...what?
Will public places now have to provide adult size high chairs for people with adult baby syndrome? ROFLMAO
I have heard of this a few times before. It makes me go yuck, ewww. How can there be a girlfriend at all.
LOL I just see the typical internet thing as though OPINIONS that people have of how others live life, are votes of judgment carrying some kind of material weight.
"It's icky and weird and I don't like it."
"You're trying to normalize/legitimize it." (I need to be able to legitimately say this is not ok!)
People saying it's just wrong and he should...what...be forced to change or stop? You gonna do something to everybody who does things you don't like, that have nothing to do with you? I mean, I don't really think that anyone who is ACTUALLY CAPABLE of working should be supported by the taxpayer, but I'd say the grown adults pretending to be babies segment of that group has got to be one of the smallest, hardly worth painting crosshairs on first when it comes to those scamming a free ride, if it's even a thing.
I laugh because I always sense this element of fear in those I refer to as "muggles"...vanilla normal types with judgy attitudes...as though if they don't condemn and shame "weird" behavior, then before they know it, it's going to be everybody doing it, right in their face, they'll have people on their lawns in diapers oh my god, gotta make sure we shake our fingers sternly at deviant behaviors lest it become "the new normal"...as though there's anything that is NORMAL such that EVERYBODY should HAVE to do it anyways. But that's how they want it. Nice, safe, comfortable conformity. Really, that's how that looks and feels to those of us who have hated the limitations of "normalcy" our entire lives. You can keep it. If people aren't harming anyone and have found a way to comfortably live with their weird, then go them.
Really who the hell cares what random strangers think? The shows poke your outrage buttons on purpose for ratings. And you respond exactly the way you're supposed to. It's the evolution of the sideshow and he's the new "bearded lady." But he's the one who consented to be on television; I'm sure he had to know how people would react, predictable as people are.
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Originally Posted by jencam
They are pretending to have sex with children, but they aren't freaks? I understand you want to defend the Lifestyle, but no, this is not therapy prescribed by any reputable psychologist.
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Originally Posted by jencam
Unfortunately for me, since I can't wash my brain, I read too much about how many people practice these sexual fetishes. People doing age play are sexually aroused by the pretend that they are having sex with a baby or a young child or a teen. to say no one does is ludicrous.
Here is a nice whitewashed version than some of the crap I read and wish I never had.
A.) As I said before, MOST ageplayers I know (and I know quite a lot of them) don't cross the two things, it has nothing to do with their sexuality. It is a therapeutic role play activity they engage in sometimes. I'm not talking about the baby people, I don't know many of those, most of them play as small children. No sex. Just coloring sessions in cute jammies. And yes, they do this at BDSM parties at dungeons, I've got a friend who builds a "fort" for them at least once a month, in a corner at a party, and nothing sexual at all is happening in there. In fact a LOT of BDSM stuff isn't necessarily sexual in nature. And also? Some of us find it very funny that "vanillas" seem to believe that everything is all about sex. It's not. We kind of joke about how sex-obsessed vanilla people can be, as though that's the only possible motivation for any of what we're doing. It is far, far bigger than that for us.
B.) For those who do bring sex into it, so what? Have you even seen how much "barely legal" and fake incest porn is out there? SO MUCH. And it's right in the top searches of very mainstream vid sites. The fact is, taboo concepts push human buttons, very very often. Yet it is still relatively quite rare for the same people who watch those videos, to actually find it remotely ok to contemplate actual incest or messing with actual children. It is a misconception that there is always a slippery slope straight into perdition. There often isn't. Sometimes you find ways to activate those taboo buttons without ever crossing the "consenting adults" line--or even wanting to. A lot of BDSM has to do with that. I think many people wish that those impulses to feel excited over taboo things could be washed collectively out of the brains of every human being, and replaced with universal horror and repugnance at the very notion of anything close to taboo...but I don't think that's ever going to be likely. And I strongly believe that in finding these ways to trip, trigger, play with and control these psychological buttons, people can find ways to live peacefully and healthily with them.
Another good example are the non-consent people. I have talked to a survivor of sexual assault, who struggled to even function. She found out about a group in Denver who will negotiate and contract to "abduct" you and do a whole staged fake assault. You can stop it at any moment with a simple safe word. She set up one of these sessions, and was able to stop the act with a word, and it enabled her to feel finally in control of her life again. It exorcised that particular demon for her. Is it the kind of therapy that any psychotherapist would prescribe? No. But you know what? Years of counseling have proven utterly useless for me, as they do for some people, yet certain things I've found in the fetish community have been enormously valuable to my mental and emotional health. Sometimes, we find our therapy...wherever we find it.
Don't get me wrong, diaper guy kinda squicks me and I totally would NOT consent to be in a relationship with him. But I see no reason at all to say "that's not ok and he needs to stop." I don't care if he does that, or stops doing that. It's his life, not mine.
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Originally Posted by jencam
...He works, he isn't on disability.
All the more reason to say, "who cares?" then. Society doesn't even have a monetary stake in whether he's normal or not.
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