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Emotional vampires are people who sink in their teeth and such the lifeblood out of you. You go to visit them and leave feeling completely drained. . . . How did you get rid of them?
I had to change my own thinking, and then was able to change my behavior. Once I became certain that my time was every bit as valuable as their time, I stopped feeding them. Sometimes I interrupt them just as they're starting and say, "Yes, I remember you told me all about that. Now tell me what steps you've taken lately to make it better." If I look them in the eye with an expectant expression, it seems to derail the complaint process before it gets up steam.
If they are set on rehashing their woes, I say kindly (and I do mean kindly, not sarcastically), "I have to go now, and I want you to let me know how you resolve this." Then I smile at them and leave. I am concerned for them and try to show it. But since I can't fix their problems, and I don't wish to subject myself to being sucked into their drama, I figure the best way to help them is to let them stand on their own two feet.
my grandma is one now that my grandpa died...she is so depressing-all she talks about is death, we hate visiting her now. even when we change the subject she somehow manages to bring it back
my grandma is one now that my grandpa died...she is so depressing-all she talks about is death, we hate visiting her now. even when we change the subject she somehow manages to bring it back
Well if she is just like this now after his death then she isn't an emotional vampire, she's depressed. If she was draining your whole life then I'd say she's an emotional vampire.
I agree with your post Carlita. She is probably depressed and needs some cheering up and some company. She also probably needs grievance counseling. Good post Carlita.
Quote:
Originally Posted by carlitasway
Well if she is just like this now after his death then she isn't an emotional vampire, she's depressed. If she was draining your whole life then I'd say she's an emotional vampire.
Well if she is just like this now after his death then she isn't an emotional vampire, she's depressed. If she was draining your whole life then I'd say she's an emotional vampire.
he died 6 years ago lol, its more taking a toll on my dad because he is losing patience....she blames him for everything and when he tries to get het to go out, make friends,take her meds, go to the doctor etc she lies and says she did.
uh maybe she is mentally ill....has she been evaluated....
Quote:
Originally Posted by babigyrl5
he died 6 years ago lol, its more taking a toll on my dad because he is losing patience....she blames him for everything and when he tries to get het to go out, make friends,take her meds, go to the doctor etc she lies and says she did.
I can't get rid of the biggest emotional vampire to me.
It's my mind.
It races and stops and is indifferent and cares and loves and hates and....
Ugh.
Essentially, it is the same for all of us.... it is our own emotions and thought processes that allows others to do this.
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