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My boyfriend and I have been together only 2yrs a little less and one thing I know, having divorced over attraction issues, is that if you love someone, you have to be mature and realistic about attraction because it won't be new forever. I do a lot to keep it fun and fresh I think. I am willing to try everything and initiate sex 9/10 times we do it. I am usually the one wanting it. Maybe I overwhelm him, but my feelings have been hurt a lot over the fact that he doesn't take my picture(nude) or ask for sexy pics of me or even mention it to me or respond when I send him a topless pic of me. It is the craziest f------thing! Just writing this is so absurdly obvious that he doesn't find me attractive. What other option is there? Oh, I'm almost 40 but pretty hot still. Not large boobs but nice ones I think and tall and pretty enough? He insists that he is attracted and when I initiate sex he almost always gets into it, but he truely never shows desire for me first. and the photo thing is just beyond me! He likes to look at pics of women on line and I'm sure he watches porn a little so why not ever want a picture of me to look at? even if you don't get turned on by pics of your GF like you would a porn star, shouldn't you at least fake it to make her feel good? What is going on with this guy?
Do you want the truth? You've pretty much already figured it out, almost.
I am tall, brunette, fairly athletic build with size Cs and nice hips, etc. Nothing is stand out hot about me but I've always been considered attractive to men I think. I am smart and confident and funny and flirty. I am not a sex pot but I like to act like one and I freakin love sex. When i send pics(only three times because of the lack of interest generated) I take many in different positions and only send a couple of hte best ones. I don't look great in every picture but who does. I don't think I photograph very well but they are not bad either. Shouldn't he just appreciate my willingness to be sexy for him?
Men are highly visual. Attraction for the vast majority of men is almost entirely visual. "Attractive" often means mildly attractive, which is something men are only turned on by in real life. I would guess he only has a very mild attraction for you. Maybe none even, but doesn't find you unattractive either (the vast majority of "average-pretty" women fall into this category for me.) Photographs of mildly attractive women do absolutely nothing for me. I'd guess he feels the same.
People, note that this is an ancient thread. If you reply directly to the OP, your point will not reach her, since she hasn't posted on City-Data in more than 8 years.
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People, note that this is an ancient thread. If you reply directly to the OP, your point will not reach her, since she hasn't posted on City-Data in more than 8 years.
Maybe people respond here instead of starting another thread that is similar to this one.
Oh we work perfectly I just can't wrap my head around why he would rather look at other woman on fb, porn, tv and things like that but all the porn he watches, the chicks look exactly like me. They do nothing different. I try to spice things up but he likes things to be simple, which is fine with me. I love what we do in the bedroom.. but I wish he got excited to see my pix or see me naked. I've tried sexy outfits, tried asking to "blow him" while he drives lol, tried in the parking lot n everything. He seems modest to me in a way.. a few weekends ago we went to Halloween horror nights, so many girls my age wearing booty shorts so small they could pass as underwear and I said how come we both like looking at girls like that but when I try to do it u tell me it's trashy. He said, " because they're trash, they're slutty, I don't want my wife to be that way, only in the bedroom"... Which kind of makes since but still, if u don't like wanna have sex all the time why not try different things to make it more exciting? He doesn't want to mix it up. We have done a threesome n he didn't wanna have sex with her only me but he liked watching me and her which I think was respectful and the sex for me n him that night was crazy good but idk, why do men love looking at other women but when they have one they only wanna look at them alot in the beginning.. I've been with him for 3 yrs n I still get chills looking at him
My guy says he wouldn't even be with me if he wasn't attracted lol
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