Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I have a friend i have known for years, we've dated for four years and even talked about marriage, but then i got a job in another state and had to leave he had other things going on so we broke up because of the move and did not want to have a long distance relationship with each other. We began talking again recently and he has brought up marriage again. I care about him, we are compatible as we work hard and want the same things in life but the butterflies just are not there and never have been there. I thought that maybe overtime the love will grow but not sure if i want to take that chance. He has many qualitites that will make him husband material but i'm just not in love and feel like at this stage of the game should love play such a major role. He is 35 I am 29....what are your thoughts should being all in love with the butterflies and all the other stuff matter.
Not having butterflies doesn't mean it's not love.
What exactly do you think love means? I don't think you can be with a person for as long as you two were and not love each other, but if all it took was some distance for the two of you to agree it wasn't worth it to stay together then I'm not sure there's enough love to constitute marriage.
I have a friend I care about him, we are compatible as we work hard and want the same things in life but the butterflies just are not there and never have been there.
Well I think its great that you want same things in life...I think thats very imp.
If u say no...then...what r the consequences...wud he stop talking to u altogether..wud u lose yr friend???
Pros and cons and finally---As you grow old, YOU WANT SOMEONE WHO CAN UNDERSTAND YOU, LOVE YOU AS YOU ARE and THE BEST PART YOU DONT HAVE TO ANYWHERE, WHEN YOU WANT TO TALK TO A FRIEND
Marriage is hard enough even when you're married to someone you deeply love. I would imagine it would be impossible if married to someone you didn't love.
I've been in your shoes, I was with a wonderful man for 6 1/2 years. He was pretty much everything I ever wanted except I wasn't in love with him. I kept sticking around because I thought eventually the love would kick in but it never did. I had to accept the fact that as much as I loved him I wasn't actually in love with him. I though he deserved better, so I turned down his marriage proposal and let him go.
All those feelings that I never felt for him, I feel for the man I'm with now. But we have more issues. Being completely honest, I would have to say that I'm glad I didn't settle for Mr. Good Enough, it's wouldn't have been fair to him. Would you want this guy to marry you because you were good enough?
Marriage is hard enough even when you're married to someone you deeply love. I would imagine it would be impossible if married to someone you didn't love.
Well said. Everyone deserves the chance to find a mate that reciprocates their love and moving forward with this would deny you both that chance.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I think you shud go for him
