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If you found a really nice man, who has a great personality but is way older than you are, will you refrain yourself from a relationship due to age or go ahead??? If you like him and enjoy his company but still don't feel a physical attraction but a spiritual attraction instead??? Tell me what you guys think???
Forget the age difference. This sounds like a friendship, not a relationship. You are "spiritually" attracted and "enjoy his company" but admit right off the bat that there is no physical attraction? Then why the heck would you consider dating him?
I think in certain cases, a May-December thing can work out, particularly when the younger person has had time to establish themselves fully as an adult. At that point, I worry less that a power differential is in play. But here, I think it's irrelevant. If you're not attracted to him, even in these initial stages, what's the point?
I don't know if a pro or a con. It's a matter of personal choice. Do you feel more comfortable with people who are older than you, or are you more mature than people your age. If the answer is yes, maybe you have more affinity towards him because you can relate , not your experiences but your attitude towards life. Pros are: person who's got experience and may be settled in life, knows what he wants and has confidence
(usually but not always). Cons: his health could be a drawback as he ages, unless he is a healthy man and knows how to take care of himself. also, family could be critical of such relationship.
Sometimes , love starts off as a friendship and with time grows into liking and people may end up in love. it's your call Starz... do what your intuition tells you is best.
If you found a really nice man, who has a great personality but is way older than you are, will you refrain yourself from a relationship due to age or go ahead??? If you like him and enjoy his company but still don't feel a physical attraction but a spiritual attraction instead??? Tell me what you guys think???
I married a man 19 yrs older than myself and we are still married after 30 years. There's plenty of May/December romances that last, but just like any relationship, it depends on the people involved. If you love someone and are committed to being married, you make it work.
There are no guarantees with anyones health. I had a dear friend die of a heart attack at 40 yrs of age. It happens. You just need to find a person you love enough that when you get fat or he loses his hair, you still love each other.
IMO, older Dad's are often more involved, more loving and more patient with their kids than 20 somethings who are still growing up and finding themselves or trying to get ahead in their careers.
My only concern with your post would be the lack of physical attraction. If thats not there now, it probably won't improve with aging.
Well... This question interests me because not so long ago I was "all crazy over" a man who's 18 years my senior. Then I got glasses. Hehehe just kidding about that last part. Anyway I told myself all the little phrases about "age doesn't matter" but it's a lie--age does matter, absolutely!
There is a lot of growing up to do between 25 and 43--even a lot of growing up between 30 and 43. I try to understand that maybe after a certain point age might not matter as much, but when? Imagine you're 50 and your partner is 68... Yeah, to me, that's still too far. And, yes, I know that some couples out there have been able to make the age difference work, but that's what it is, work. Would I be comfortable with my partner having to wait for me to "catch up" on certain things, to wait for me to figure out things that he had figured out nearly two decades ago? Would I be comfortable and tolerant of health problems that come inevitably with aging, and having to face those much earlier in my life through my partner? Would I be able to get over the fact that my partner is only five years younger than my father (knowing that my father would not like that fact at all and it would cause so much tension alone)? To all of these situations, I say no. That is too much to cope with in addition to the numerous other issues that come up in any relationship.
Some positives? I don't know any from experience of course, but I've heard ladies my age muse over the good possiblities of having a much-older partner, possibilities such as: financial stability, career stability, more "life experience," a more gentlemanly/mature/protective personality... None of these are guaranteed, obviously.
I married a man 19 yrs older than myself and we are still married after 30 years. There's plenty of May/December romances that last, but just like any relationship, it depends on the people involved. If you love someone and are committed to being married, you make it work.
There are no guarantees with anyones health. I had a dear friend die of a heart attack at 40 yrs of age. It happens. You just need to find a person you love enough that when you get fat or he loses his hair, you still love each other.
IMO, older Dad's are often more involved, more loving and more patient with their kids than 20 somethings who are still growing up and finding themselves or trying to get ahead in their careers.
My only concern with your post would be the lack of physical attraction. If thats not there now, it probably won't improve with aging.
Sometimes friendship can become something more. Just try to get to know him and see if you have things in common. Romances can start two different ways, really hot, meaning you are deeply attracted to that person, and the attraction dies down but becomes more of a deep feeling of love and respect or friendship, which can start cold, and both of you start warming up to each other as you get to know the other as a person. older men have had the opportunity to have fun in their younger years, and look to settle with someone to share the rest of their life. Healthwise, even young people may have issues. Just give a try...
Like others have said, it doesn't seem like it's his age that's bothering you.
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would you date someone 19 years older than you?
