Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
FWB was never my thing. Sex to me is an emotional thing, spiritual bond and connection and i just couldn't do it with someone casually. If I had a strong connection with a man, I wanted something more, something deeper than FWB. Otherwise, I would get hurt.
To answer the question though, sure, I am sure in some situations it turned into something more for some people. FWB is quite common these days and I am sure some people turned it into relationships.
Same. It just never appealed, so I always steered clear when the option presented itself. There's something to be said for knowing yourself and what you aren't really wired for.
A think a lot of women talk themselves into thinking they're okay with this setup, only to get in the thick of the arrangement to find that, no, they're really not. I think there are, indeed, some women who are just fine with this depth of intimacy, and don't care for anything deeper, but I do believe that the vast majority of women who agree to FWB situations are snowing themselves, and wind up getting themselves hurt. I've seen too many formerly hard-as-nails women reduced to blubbering messes as a result of a situation of their own creation. Just an opinion.
Can't speak to men, as I haven't known nearly as many men in these situations as women.
friends with benefits never works out for one of the friends. Usually it is the chic. Why give anyone all ur treats without any commitment? And if u say all u want is a one night stand every now and then why not get a toy. Its safer... I don't know about love triangle, but lust with multiple angles is far more likely.
I acted like a guy in fwb. He was there to meet my needs and that's it. I never did fwb with someone I really liked and wanted to be in a relationship with. Sometimes fwb's did want a relationship and I couldn't do it because he's a man s**t. Yeah, totally hypocritical and ultimately wasn't for me. It isn't just the women who want more which I was surprised by. The whole thing becomes messy and feels wrong plus sex isn't as intense as it should be. The love/sex combo is the best, everything else is below par.
Friends with benefits, in my opinion, is not a good deal for a woman. If it's only about the sex with no emotional commitment, a woman is doing herself a disfavor by only having sex with one guy, when she might as well be having sex with a different guy every time. By having only one friends with benefits , or a couple, that rotate, she is indeed making a commitment to only give that one guy sex on a regular basis. Which makes me wonder why?
I wouldn't have a friends with benefits relationship with anyone since it defies all rational logic, in my opinion. I can understand having a boyfriend and being exclusive with him, but having just a friend to have sex with while denying other men the same priviledge is mind boggling, since all a woman has to do to get sex is go up to a guy and say she wants him, and she'll get it. Same difference with a FWB since there is no emotional attachment. So why have only one or two guys to have sex with when the world is full of good looking men who might surprise you with their bedroom skills?
Why do you care?
Ummm, there are many reasons why women want FWBs over serious relationships. I don't want a relationship.
So your choices are nothing, committed relationship, or sleep with every male that moves?
That logic, in itself, defies logic.
My question, for women, is that if a guy wants no commitment with you, except for "bootie" call, whenever...why are you putting up with this type of treatment? The world is full of men, who would treat you much better than that. And, realize, that he may be dating someone else, while you are his "back up", the question I have, is why isn't he dating you?
Sure, I will admit to having had a FWB, with a guy, for fun, it was completely meaningless to me. I did not want any LTR with him, but, he wanted one with me, very much. And I realized how cruel it was for our relationship to continue. At least I had the conscience to break it off, rather than keeping using him. Few men have that ability. They would just keep taking...so, think...are you completely meaningless to a guy?
I usually initiate the FWB arrangement.
I don't want a relationship but I want to get laid now and again, by a friend.
The world is not a cookie cutter.
What works for one may not work for another, but to denigrate women who have FWB relationships (and they are relationships by their own rules) is unfair and uncalled for.
Don't want it, don't do it. But don't project your morals on them.
Stars above: is it any wonder that happy marriages and even longterm relationships are increasingly rare these days? These cutesy, tech-driven, yet superfluous and puerile abbreviations and slang-terms in regards to emotoinal and romantic conditions speak volumes as to the respective intellectual depth and the attention span of people.
"Baby Daddies" is another one. You people take crucial, important, sacred matters of the heart and the human condition and reduce them to acronyms and abbreviations that carry as much depth as "LOL." You may not realize it, but this practice is a barometer of sorts, measuring your willingness to commit.
You'll see.
Not everyone wants to commit.
Geez.
Quit judging.
If it doesn't work for you, don't do it.
I acted like a guy in fwb. He was there to meet my needs and that's it. I never did fwb with someone I really liked and wanted to be in a relationship with. Sometimes fwb's did want a relationship and I couldn't do it because he's a man s**t. Yeah, totally hypocritical and ultimately wasn't for me. It isn't just the women who want more which I was surprised by. The whole thing becomes messy and feels wrong plus sex isn't as intense as it should be. The love/sex combo is the best, everything else is below par.
LMAO! Do you treat all your "friends" this way? If not then what you had was a **** buddy, miles below the experience of having a sexual friendship with someone you like, care for and respect. You are very confused it seems.
Originally Posted by jasper12 My question, for women, is that if a guy wants no commitment with you, except for "bootie" call, whenever...why are you putting up with this type of treatment? The world is full of men, who would treat you much better than that. And, realize, that he may be dating someone else, while you are his "back up", the question I have, is why isn't he dating you?
Sure, I will admit to having had a FWB, with a guy, for fun, it was completely meaningless to me. I did not want any LTR with him, but, he wanted one with me,... are you completely meaningless to a guy?
Quote:
Originally Posted by chielgirl
I usually initiate the FWB arrangement.
I don't want a relationship but I want to get laid now and again, by a friend.
The world is not a cookie cutter.
What works for one may not work for another, but to denigrate women who have FWB relationships (and they are relationships by their own rules) is unfair and uncalled for.
Don't want it, don't do it. But don't project your morals on them.
Exactly, Chielgirl. Also, what makes people think it is all for the guy's benefit when several of us have stated it is for OUR benefit as well. The concept of FWB implies NO COMMITMENT, so who cares if he is dating others? That's the whole point. As to why he isn't dating "me", it's because we are friends and not lovers: just sex partners. How difficult is that concept to grasp?
Quote:
Originally Posted by zentropa
LMAO! Do you treat all your "friends" this way? If not then what you had was a **** buddy, miles below the experience of having a sexual friendship with someone you like, care for and respect. You are very confused it seems.
I think we are wasting our fingers trying to explain this concept to people who do not want to get it. Their minds are closed and the idea of friendship is a foreign concept that has reached its quota for immigration.
Friends care about each other. Friends can and do make for great marriages but there is generally something extra - a romantic interest. Friends with benefits are friends. Why can't friends engage in activities together? They go bowling, even dancing and there's no problem in your minds; but let that activity be sex and you all freak out. Sex is sex. It isn't love and it isn't romantic. It's sex - enjoyment and fun. Good grief have none of you ever laughed during sex? You have no idea what you're missing if you haven't.
BTW, wherever did the concept of "giving away the goodies" come from? Munchkin movies? Sex involves body parts - the one who gives ALSO GETS! People, it's a 2-way street (or sometimes 3-way).
I've had plenty of FWB and they always end up like herpes; they leave but keep coming back over and over.............Not everyone can understand this arrangement and then it compromises the friendship. So, if it is a GREAT friend? Scratch that itch somewhere else! A great friend usually lasts longer than a good lay.
Friends with benifits. Now here's some benifits I could actually benifit from--Hey, I need a few hudred, how 'bout it? Thanks! Hey, I got two flats on my truck at home, do ya mind? Thanks! What? Ya got two tickets to the big game on Sunday? Can I have 'em? Thanks! Oh wow, don't know what I ate last night, but I was puking something awful all over the house. The smell is really killing me. Hey, do ya mind? THANKS!!
Trying too hard to be funny.
I also hate it when people attach images, it make me think that another pretty girl is wondering if we all think she's pretty
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Yeah, totally hypocritical and ultimately wasn't for me. It isn't just the women who want more which I was surprised by. The whole thing becomes messy and feels wrong plus sex isn't as intense as it should be. The love/sex combo is the best, everything else is below par.
