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Yeah. My perspective is that it's either fear or laziness.
I went on there as an escape to get out of the grind of approaching, for example. And I was always honest with myself about that. That was when I was beginning to properly cold-approach women, and the process was really hard for me.
I have friends who are successful in general with women, who use it as laziness. They want to set up easy, convenient dates. They don't want the rigmaroll of the constant approach. That's fair enough, becuase they are being honest.
I also have friends and family members who use it as pure avoidance. It comes from fear. And that actually gets them into very bad situations.
I could tell you some stories from my recent life....
Actually, sod it. Why not?
I have a cousin who goes on Tinder a lot. Rich guy (I come from a good family), but crap with women.
Got with a single mother off of Tinder that already had two kids from two different men. After just one or two months of going out, she had a "pregnancy scare". Turns out that it was wrong
Then, surprise, a month after that, she really does fall pregnant (they've been to the doctor, I think).
Now, even the women in my family are saying that the first "scare" was a test, to see how he would respond. She obviously has marked him out as a good provider.
Why didn't he just dump her after that first one? Fear and laziness. It's like a man in the desert, that finds a pool of water. He doesn't know when the next one is coming along, so he stays there - come what may.
Men with decent options, an abundance mindset, have a different perspective. I find.
Well, for me, it's definitely not fear at this point in my life. And I wouldn't say it's so much laziness, but rather me doing both in real life, and online dating. Why not? It's free, use it when I'm at home (which is a lot since I tend to be a homebody, though not quite as much as in my younger years), etc.
Not to mention, with the women on OLD, you know a lot of them are looking to date at the very least. In real life, you don't know that with the woman you approach. More targeted in that regard.
Well, for me, it's definitely not fear at this point in my life. And I wouldn't say it's so much laziness, but rather me doing both in real life, and online dating. Why not? It's free, use it when I'm at home (which is a lot since I tend to be a homebody, though not quite as much as in my younger years), etc.
Not to mention, with the women on OLD, you know a lot of them are looking to date at the very least. In real life, you don't know that with the woman you approach. More targeted in that regard.
This is what a lot of us are saying. That the targeted approach, especially for older folks whose dating pool is likely narrowed down by the fact that a lot of people in their age group are unavailable. Or for people who target a specific demographic/niche that is in short supply out in the wild. This is true for a lot of people with more than generic or basic criteria.
I think he means that girls who are 0s to 7s are acting like they are 8s and 10s and skipping over guys who ARE in their league, looking for a guy who's way out of their league. And all the while, missing out on what they're looking for when they could find it right in front of them.
I think that's what they meant.
Men do this too. The most unattractive guys think they should have the hottest women. Men always try to date out of their so-called league.
Men do this too. The most unattractive guys think they should have the hottest women. Men always try to date out of their so-called league.
Based no my experience and the experience of the men I dated from OLD (because it was a topic of conversation on dates). There are a lot of people out there, both men and women, with unrealistic expectations. I think those people are the ones who struggle the most with online dating (and probably are the same ones who struggle with dating in general).
Men do this too. The most unattractive guys think they should have the hottest women. Men always try to date out of their so-called league.
I know where you are coming from with ^^^^ and I'll agree if it doesn't work out then a more realistic approach would suffice.
But in fairness if they have the confidence and know how to go for women out of their " league " then why not?
I've pretty much ALWAYS punched above my own weight when it comes to going for women that most would think are too good for me and often have to endure/shrug off the " lady and the tramp " jokes or even the odd snarky comment/dirty look but it's mostly worked out for me and I'm sure it does work for others as well
There's nothing wrong with trying your luck and going for it in my opinion
Shouldn't women do the same? What if a woman is overweight?
Where the heck did i imply they shouldn't?
And so what if they're overweight or any other feature that YOU might find unattractive, attractiveness is as subjective as it's gets and is different to everyone
ANYONE should be able to go for whom ever they like without others looking down at them and casting judgement wouldn't you agree?
And so what if they're overweight or any other feature that YOU might find unattractive, attractiveness is as subjective as it's gets and is different to everyone
ANYONE should be able to go for whom ever they like without others looking down at them and casting judgement wouldn't you agree?
I agree. I only mention weight because men who OLD always complain about the amount of overweight women online, but there are just as many overweight men online trying to get the hottest women. And these same overweight men are usually not going for overweight women.
I agree. I only mention weight because men who OLD always complain about the amount of overweight women online, but there are just as many overweight men online trying to get the hottest women. And these same overweight men are usually not going for overweight women.
Fair enough then that's the people that most could do without then if they are complaining about this and that
I don't even use OLD but I'm sure most are not like this?
It really makes me laugh though if honest, I can't for the life of me fathom out why some people get so offended or complain about OLD like " men do this " or " women do that " etc etc and get quite worked up about it......The time spent on moaning, whinging, complaining and making silly generalisations could really be better spent on actually finding someone that you are suitable with and does fit the mould
If someone's not for you just " swipe right " or whatever the term is and move on... What's the point in festering over it?
( this is not aimed at you but a general question to all thank you )
Nothing wrong with aiming high, in my opinion. Why not? If it doesn't work out, you can always re-evaluate your "must haves". However, it's the entitlement, bitterness, and whining that I don't sympathize with.
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