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He dumped me before I could do it. So it's okay but hurt my ego. I was making too many comments and remarks about him smoking weed all day. So he ended it before i could say it.
You deserve a good man who has passion, one who will love you the way you deserve to be loved, cherish you, & respect you.....
Well Ruth, that's the main reason why guys meet women. Surely, guys aren't looking for a bowling partner, Lol
But meeting them is just the beginning. First you have to see if she's even into you at all. The condom issue won't be relevant unless she's into you and you pass muster. And visa versa. What if you decide you're not into her? End of story. This is the OP's problem; it's not the meeting that's the hard part. It's finding mutual interest that's the real challenge. Anyone can meet women (except all the shy guys). Getting just to the first date is a whole other matter. Then from there, you have to get to the second date. Meeting is simple, compared to all that.
It's about adapting and learning how to pair yourself with the people of your surroundings. Gaming in one area whether city, state, or even town, is not the same as gaming in another area. But yet, people have this notion that "dating is the same in every city" and they approach it the same. It is far from the truth. Some cities are more laid back, some have more over-achievers who are more pre-occupied with work, and some cities require harder advances in the approach to break the ice.
Problem is, people take their “dating skills” and try to apply it in every place, to everyone, and at any time. Many people don’t consider their surroundings or even pick up on social cues associated with that area in particular and expect things to “magically fall into place”.
For example- I can't expect to pick up or approach women the same way I do in the Bronx that I would in long island strictly for the many reasons I would find Puerto Ricans occupying the BX area vs Italians in Long island. Not to say I couldn't use the same approach but there is a difference in culture and you need to be aware of some of the cultural cues. It helps with making the connection.
This is one of the things I have noticed is that regions in this country has different dating styles and tastes and approach methods. Again you mentioned NYC and its suburbs. I have to say that the suburban women in the area are much more approachable compared to women in the city. Example I notice a couple of differences between people in my area for example I live in the hood, women here desire a man that is physically attractive regardless of his status just as long as he is good looking, if your not good looking the women don't really want you and this type of attitude with women can stretch as far until their late 30s or early 40s when its time to finally find a good man which for many will be too late. Mind most of these women who desire a physically attractive man are not hot themselves, man are fat and overweight due to having kids and not got rid of baby fat.
A mile a way in Manhattan and in places like hip Brooklyn women prefer a man with status like if he has an amazing job or some creative artist of some sort, has an amazing pad in an hip area even if its small or is shared with roomates, as well as a man must of attended a well known 4 year college institution and last majority of these women prefer white men.
Both groups of women I have noticed shun decent good men because they do not measure up to their tastes and styles. In order to approach any of these women one must be approachable. Hell if desireable women might even approach you. If one guy does not fit in either dating styles women don't really want them. In order for me to approach either group of women I have to be well embedded in to their styles, trends, tastes and so forth, as well as dating parameters are very different do to having different dating culture. Dating within the same region even if its a mile away can be vastly different and one should know the cues of dating women in them. In my area especially since I live in two different worlds, women are funny, hood chicks don't find me attractive even though my looks are average and the women in the hip areas wont date due to lack of status even though I'm educated. I have dated women in both enviornments and both are different, like a hood woman would prefer a vacation in Jamaica or Dominican Republic while an Yuppie woman would prefer a vacation in Costa Rica or Thailand. I have visited other parts of the country which are slow and laidback and women are much more friendly, approachable and available. Women are not the same every you go in this country.
My advice for guys who are having an hardtime meeting women is just try to enjoy life, travel see the country or world, improve your health, like loosing weight, tone up and fixing your teeth, try and build up your academic and income repertoire.
Last edited by Bronxguyanese; 12-09-2014 at 09:17 PM..
I agree with Bronxguyanese post where it stated to just try to enjoy life.
Guys put too much pressure on themselves into meeting and attracting women. It takes the stress off and makes it easier to just relax. Plus, women respond better to guys when they know they’re relaxed because it shows confidence and confidence is what mainly attracts a woman to a man.
It’s true that nobody likes rejection but unfortunately its an unavoidable part of dating. Back to back rejection can make a person feel unconfident and unworthy. Repeated rejection can make a person tend to assume the worst (ie. Feeling undesirable, unattractive, unworthy, etc).
The only way you won’t get rejected is if you’re doing absolutely nothing. So learning to look at rejection from a different point of view is primitive. I know because I was definitely one of those guys that put too much pressure on dating in my teens. I found that I needed to stop pointing blame. I needed to stop blaming others and mostly needed to stop blaming myself. Anybody can get dates and there’s somebody for everybody. You don’t have to be wealthy or even beautiful to get dates. That’s a common misconception that both men and women make thinking that a girl will only fall for a guy with a Bentley or Rolls Royce, or a guy will only fall for fall for a woman who’s young or gorgeous.
At the end of the day, anyone who has a problem getting a date, the issue isn’t necessarily a person’s income, age, or looks. The issue is that they’re doing something to eliminate themselves out of the competition. It’s up to the person to figure what it is. Perhaps their standards are too high, they can’t stand imperfection (which we all have), they’re too judgmental, too serious, need to build their own self-esteem, etc.
I agree with Bronxguyanese post where it stated to just try to enjoy life.
Guys put too much pressure on themselves into meeting and attracting women. It takes the stress off and makes it easier to just relax. Plus, women respond better to guys when they know they’re relaxed because it shows confidence and confidence is what mainly attracts a woman to a man.
It’s true that nobody likes rejection but unfortunately its an unavoidable part of dating. Back to back rejection can make a person feel unconfident and unworthy. Repeated rejection can make a person tend to assume the worst (ie. Feeling undesirable, unattractive, unworthy, etc).
The only way you won’t get rejected is if you’re doing absolutely nothing. So learning to look at rejection from a different point of view is primitive. I know because I was definitely one of those guys that put too much pressure on dating in my teens. I found that I needed to stop pointing blame. I needed to stop blaming others and mostly needed to stop blaming myself. Anybody can get dates and there’s somebody for everybody. You don’t have to be wealthy or even beautiful to get dates. That’s a common misconception that both men and women make thinking that a girl will only fall for a guy with a Bentley or Rolls Royce, or a guy will only fall for fall for a woman who’s young or gorgeous.
At the end of the day, anyone who has a problem getting a date, the issue isn’t necessarily a person’s income, age, or looks. The issue is that they’re doing something to eliminate themselves out of the competition. It’s up to the person to figure what it is. Perhaps their standards are too high, they can’t stand imperfection (which we all have), they’re too judgmental, too serious, need to build their own self-esteem, etc.
I couldn't have said it better myself.
I believe it would be so much easier if people could ignore the concepts we have been given to follow by society. Especially when all they do is make you feel like crap. I mean folks can genuinely believe that doing what those concepts say will make them feel better. Where is the sense and originality in that?
You cannot live your life trying to please others, following their rules, and not even consider how you truly feel about things yourself.
People have brains for a reason.
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