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I'm having a really hard time deciding if i am weird or in the wrong about this.
I do NOT believe in casual sex.
I do not care if someone else has it, not judging them.
every single time someone has found out i'm gay they try to 'hook me up' with another gay guy they know.
the who scene in my town entails having sex with someone first and then finding out if you're compatible.
people are wondering what's wrong with me.. why i'm not out there etc.
even my sister thinks that i'm in the wrong.
It's irritating.
I feel like i just want to be left alone, but at the same time i'm lonely.
I feel like i just have morals that i'm not willing to give up to 'belong' with others.
people really irritate me and it's very stressful to have to be in conflict with others constantly because apparently i'm not living the way i'm supposed to like everybody else.
You sound simply like a guy who wants a relationship...
Isn't there a gay match.com or some other dating site?
But I could see how a gay relationship could entail tons of casual sex, and quickly. With woman, guys are usually the ones doing the initiating...now TWO guys - my God!
Location: The western periphery of Terra Australis
24,544 posts, read 56,043,908 times
Reputation: 11862
Quote:
Originally Posted by TheEarthBeneathMe
You sound simply like a guy who wants a relationship...
Isn't there a gay match.com or some other dating site?
But I could see how a gay relationship could entail tons of casual sex, and quickly. With woman, guys are usually the ones doing the initiating...now TWO guys - my God!
Anyway, good luck.
Haha, I guess his boyfriend will have to be the one doing the initiating/seducing.
My brother is just like you. He can't see the appeal of casual sex and he longs for somebody who's REALLY interested in getting to know him and have a relationship. He's only 20 (21 soon) and that makes it all the more difficult because the young guys generally want to have fun for some years before looking for something more serious.
Needless to say, I wouldn't dream of asking him to change his mindset. I have some gay friends/acquaintances who love and live the scene, but I know my brother and he would never be happy doing that.
You're not weird at all! You're an individual and you have your own ways. Your family and friends are trying to be helpful (and the "let's see what happens" matchmaking is the typical, and often misguided, thing you do when you know someone who's single lol), but only you can know whether or not you need that, or you need other things instead.
I respect your values. There is nothing wrong with you.
Date until you find the person who is right for you. Sex does not have to be first in any relationship. Involve yourself in activities of interest and keep yourself as busy as you need to be.
I'm having a really hard time deciding if i am weird or in the wrong about this.
I do NOT believe in casual sex.
I do not care if someone else has it, not judging them.
every single time someone has found out i'm gay they try to 'hook me up' with another gay guy they know.
the who scene in my town entails having sex with someone first and then finding out if you're compatible.
people are wondering what's wrong with me.. why i'm not out there etc.
even my sister thinks that i'm in the wrong.
It's irritating.
I feel like i just want to be left alone, but at the same time i'm lonely.
I feel like i just have morals that i'm not willing to give up to 'belong' with others.
people really irritate me and it's very stressful to have to be in conflict with others constantly because apparently i'm not living the way i'm supposed to like everybody else.
I'm having a really hard time deciding if i am weird or in the wrong about this.
I do NOT believe in casual sex.
I do not care if someone else has it, not judging them.
every single time someone has found out i'm gay they try to 'hook me up' with another gay guy they know.
the who scene in my town entails having sex with someone first and then finding out if you're compatible.
people are wondering what's wrong with me.. why i'm not out there etc.
even my sister thinks that i'm in the wrong.
It's irritating.
I feel like i just want to be left alone, but at the same time i'm lonely.
I feel like i just have morals that i'm not willing to give up to 'belong' with others.
people really irritate me and it's very stressful to have to be in conflict with others constantly because apparently i'm not living the way i'm supposed to like everybody else.
You know where you stand now stand firm. If you stand for nothing you will fall for anything. Hold true to your morals whatever they are.
OP, do you live somewhere where you could get involved in other gay activities? I have friends who belong to gay movie clubs or softball teams, which gives them an opportunity to meet other like-minded people outside of a meat market bar.
How about you just live life and stop focusing on the gay cliche lifestyle. Not every gay guy acts like that. Only clubbing skanks...just like the straits.
Its good to know that gay's have just as hard of a time as us straight people! Ha, just kiding.
But seriously, what about moving? In Chicago they have a very active gay scene. I enjoy the gay culture in our city as a straight male and I would imagine its where I would want to be if I were indeed gay.
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