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I believe you, I'm truly curious and asking because most stories I hear and read about people getting paid less, always seem to have the pattern of discovery after the person is no longer with the company. I've never known how much other people made at the jobs I worked, unless individuals shared their salary amounts, which was only common with peers in high school jobs.
It's similar to my curiosity of people who don't get hired, yet knows who received the position and says they either lost it to an affirmative action recipient (in the case of a non-minority) or was discriminated against (in the case of a minority). I wonder how they find out if they don't work there and don't know anyone who does.
In my case it was a situation where someone in HR handed me a list of salaries to create a database. While looking at them I found out that I was paid less than my male coworkers and even males who started at lower rates than me, including a man just out of college. He was promoted three times in the 2 1/2 years I was there.
I am very marriage minded because I enjoy the idea of falling in love with my soul mate, and sharing that bond with her, but honestly when I think about it I have no reason to be interested in marriage. Every example of marriage that I have known in my life ended in disaster. Both of my parents were divorced several times each, 2 brothers and a sister have all been divorced. My youngest brothers marriage ended after only 1 year. None of these divorces ended in any detriment to my parents or siblings. It didn't ruin them financially. None of my siblings pay alimony. But still I wonder what is wrong with me because I am pretty die hard about making that commitment and everyone I love has failed at it
Hope springs eternal! Good for you, BioMech! Wishing you & your SO lasting happiness.
I believe you, I'm truly curious and asking because most stories I hear and read about people getting paid less, always seem to have the pattern of discovery after the person is no longer with the company. I've never known how much other people made at the jobs I worked, unless individuals shared their salary amounts, which was only common with peers in high school jobs.
It's similar to my curiosity of people who don't get hired, yet knows who received the position and says they either lost it to an affirmative action recipient (in the case of a non-minority) or was discriminated against (in the case of a minority). I wonder how they find out if they don't work there and don't know anyone who does.
I found out because there was a class action lawsuit on the company where salary information was made public. They asked if I wanted to be involved, but I didn't want my name on the paperwork. I'm actually pretty happy I didn't because the three people involved ended up moving away because they were basically blackballed from getting a job in my county.
Plus, I knew a few people at the corporate office. The class action lawsuit started because the 'secretary' at the corporate office was getting paid a LOT of money (60k+) and it turned out she was dating one of the regional managers who was approving her pay. They both ended up getting fired, but later got married and divorced. That whole company was kinda messed up.
A man earning a living is DIFFERENT then a woman earning a living because the standards that men have to achieve, and constantly achieve, is set much higher in addition to the fact that we have no other person to fall back to when something goes wrong. For example, a man can't say, "well, I'm going to drop out of Law school but I know Sally will marry and take care of me anyway."
In 2013, more men are working longer hours then men in the past because they are married to women who do not cook, clean, or take care of the kids.
In other words, men today not only have to work outside the home and maintain their traditional gender role, but they have to come home and clean, change diapers, and cook meals because either their women are at work, or their wives flat out refuse to do anything but watch TV and eat ice cream.
Well if you are comparing the experience of men married to women who work compared to years ago when most women did not work then it will of course be different. In my circle of people I know, most women work. Some are the sole wage earners, and the dads(per the choice of the dad) have little or no involvement with their kids.
Are you suggesting that when both partners work, the man shouldn't do some cleaning etc. I personally know no women who only watch TV and eat ice cream, but curiously you seem to hang around a weird class of people.
As to your other point very few women with common sense start their adult lives with the expectation someone will take care of them.
In my case it was a situation where someone in HR handed me a list of salaries to create a database. While looking at them I found out that I was paid less than my male coworkers and even males who started at lower rates than me, including a man just out of college. He was promoted three times in the 2 1/2 years I was there.
i kind of prefer testimonials like this and Jet Jockey's--first-hand experience from the trenches. It lends an immediacy to the discussion, and is much more interesting reading than some dry article or sheet of statistics. On the other hand, "data" do have their place.
Sorry to hear this happened to you, IDDY. Thx for posting.
That's cute that you think women are paid the same for the same amount of work.
I know for a fact that isn't the case in many industries.
Interestingly, women like you described get married, get boyfriends and rarely have a problem with suitors...while the women like me, the ones who aren't materialistic, who make decent money and support themselves often have more difficulty finding a guy who will date them. Odd how that workds.
Yep, exactly. I have always been driven to be successful and it has scared men off. When I then mention my masters degree or my computer certifications (I work in a computer based field)many men decide they don't want to date me. Meanwhile I know several air head bimbos with job aspirations who are married to men and never struggled to date.
Guys! We have a newb! An unabashed White Knight, of Nice Guy, or whatever the appropriate C-D term is, at that!
Welcome, Chrisv! Welcome, indeed! Don't hesitate to dive right in and add your voice to the cacaphony of opinions, midguided, and otherwise.
Haha, thanks for the welcome! Trust me, i'm no white knight. I disagree with women quite often on other issues, and i'm not afraid to call them on their BS when i see it. But this issue is clearly an area where men are wrong. Guys who don't pick up after themselves or help out with household chores are just ridiculous. The woman and man both work full-time jobs, why should the man get to drink a cold beer and watch SportsCenter while the woman cooks dinner, does dishes, bathes the kids, etc??
marriage is down 50%.
42 million plus divorces filed since 1975 no fault, 70% filed by women. even an incest learns after awhile.
This.
I have absolutely no desire to contribute to the divorce rate or have the kids involved suffer from travelling house to house for visitation BS.
Marriage has little to do with loving, honouring, cherishing and respecting that special someone in a lifelong partnership. Not anymore.
Marriage today has everything to do with screwing the other person out of every last resource and taking more than half of what that person owns for ones own benefit. It goes both ways, but women are recycling their husbands a whole lot more in todays world.
The evidence is in the fact that more churches are closing and more courtrooms are opening.
i kind of prefer testimonials like this and Jet Jockey's--first-hand experience from the trenches. It lends an immediacy to the discussion, and is much more interesting reading than some dry article or sheet of statistics.
Just saying...
Your preferences are your preferences
Facts are still facts
Quote:
Originally Posted by Idon'tdateyou
Yep, exactly. I have always been driven to be successful and it has scared men off. When I then mention my masters degree or my computer certifications (I work in a computer based field)many men decide they don't want to date me. Meanwhile I know several air head bimbos with job aspirations who are married to men and never struggled to date.
Quote:
Originally Posted by filihok
My GF just received her PhD in Neruoscience and has accepted a position with an Ivy League school. I'm pretty sure she's frequently the smartest person in the room.
It's sexy as hell
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Wishing you & your SO lasting happiness.
