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My wife is from Nordjylland (northern Jutland). The people from this region are the danish equivalent of Maine lobster-men.
We now have a sample size of 2.
1 says 'I love you'
the other doesn't.
Don't see how we can say one way or the other if Danes say 'I love you' as a rule, or not (assuming that they don't actually have to say 'I love you' in English and any similar phrase in Danish counts).
I've been with a number of danish girls. None of them ever used the words "I love you". The closest they came was "jeg holder meget af dig" , which translates to something like I like you a lot. According to my wife and many of her friends, no guy they have ever been with used the love word and they haven't either.
But these women are all from the 70s - the hippy and women's lib days in DK. The younger generation does use these words, and now my wife tells her son, grandson and father she loves them.
In relationships that were healthy, it was probably right around 3 months.
If something was off or not going well, it took longer.
IME, if there isn't some feeling of love or attachment around 3 months in, something is wrong with the relationship. Granted, I'm not 16 anymore. Also, if there isn't some emotional attachment 3 months in, I will take a hard look at the relationship.
One time, it took a woman about 5 months of dating to tell me she loved me. Even though I wasn't in love with her, I did love her in a way. So, I said it back. Probably the biggest mistake I ever made relationship wise. That relationship is history.
I once dated a man for a year and he never told me he loved me, but he bought an engagement ring and was going to propose. How do you propose to someone when you've never even said ILY?!?!
As for when someone said it and I didn't feel the same, I simply said so. I apologized that I couldn't agree with the sentiment, but I would rather be honest than lie about my feelings.
I told him I had been thinking about it, but needed more time. He said it was okay, that he didn't expect to hear it in return but I'm not sure that was the truth.
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