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No it does not. Find a woman who is happy with a small ring and wedding band, who don't mind getting married at the county courthouse, and who realizes it makes no difference where you go on the honeymoon anyway since you (if you are doing it right) will spend most of it in bed.
Does getting married have to cost so much?
NOPE. I agree with the post above. In fact that's EXACTLY how cheap my marriage was. MY husband got me a cheap wedding ring set a month AFTER our courthouse wedding which costs him a whopping $100 total. And nope we never had honeymoon. WE planned a reception but he didn't want it coz it costs too much. Well actually he already paid for the reception in advance months after our $100 wedding but we almost divorced so he cancelled it. Never resked coz he said - he didn't want it anyway.
I've never understood the appeal of expensive weddings (not even when I was a little girl). My idea of the perfect wedding is to have a bunch of friends & family members over for a wonderful barbecue in my back yard (which is very large and beautiful and peaceful) ... my SO and I would wear nice clothes but not white (I am laughing at that) ... and we'd have watermelon margaritas to drink (or some other fun summer drink).
To me, that sounds like so much fun. I bet it would be VERY memorable to those who were there.
The wedding industry is an INDUSTRY. Remember that!!
I am sure you don't have to spend 50K or even 25-30K for a wedding. I went through a calculator, and it came out at $11.5K for a decent wedding.
I am not sure how you would make it cost 50K. Just get a cheaper venue, don't buy 5K rings, keep attire cost to a minimum, use a friend or a young professional to be a photographer, don't book the most popular venue, drop the huge wedding cake (make your own or just have normal dessert service), and don't have food service at rehearsals.
It's not about affording something, it's about whether you believe that is a good way to spend money or not. For instance, I can pay $50k for a wedding in cash since I have more than that in savings...however, I don't want to spend more than $20k for a wedding + ring + honeymoon and that is ONLY because of societal pressure and my thoughts that I have not met a SINGLE woman who would not SCOFF at a $10k wedding.
IF I had my way I would spend $500 and get married in a courthouse, again, not because I do not have the cash but because I would rather spend it on my future children, on a house or other more important things in life. Makes sense? Or am I in the minority for thinking this way?
You are probably in the minority, but you've got my vote.
My Sister has been married 5 times (yes, I know ).
But I will say this, the first four times, the weddings were more elaborate and expensive. Each of those marriages started off in debt and took years to pay everything off. Well, we know where those marriages ended up. Ok, fast forward to marriage number 5 ( ).... the groom got her an antique heirloom style ring from an antique dealer for around $250. She rented her gown. They filled a small church that rented to them for next to nothing, with tons of wildflowers found all around the area, and candles. Cake was done by Sam's Club, photography by a relative who was luckily somewhat skilled. Reception afterward was just a combination of catering from several lower priced restaurants nearby.
Total cost of their wedding including everything = $1,500.00 give or take and that included all of the food, tipping the preacher, etc etc etc. THAT marriage did not start off in debt (and, they are still together). Just saying.
They can be cheap if you are smart. For example make the decorations instead of buying them and buy things used instead of new. Also, engagement rings can be cheap if you look. Personally I prefer garnet to diamond anyway.
While I'm no bridezilla if some guy suggested a courthouse wedding we definitely wouldn't be getting married. The ceremony is so important to me and so is the reception. The res of it not as much except of course my gown.
This pretty much sums it up simply and accurately.
Sadly, I might add.... If you find yourself struggling/stressed about spending 30k/50K for a wedding, then either you or your parents are not at least middle to upper class.
Middle to upper class incomes can afford such weddings without excessive credit card debt.
And if you can't afford such a wedding, then scale it down.
Starting a marriage with 20K in wedding debt is not a good way to start a marriage.
There is always going to be the, "what do I want?" vs, "what can I afford?" issue.
Tell that to the guy with 4 daughters!
And there's a difference between 'being able to pay it' and affording it!
Just think what that would do as a decent nest egg!
When I got married we decided to make it small and personal. My (now ex) husband wore his father's suit in honor of him (he had passed away a few years earlier). My dress was made for me by someone from a pattern I found. We held the ceremony at a friend's home with a minister there. We only invited people closest to us, like around 20-25 people. For flowers I got flowers for the wedding party at a sm. local florist shop. It was spring and so we went to the grocery store and bought a lot of fresh daffodils and had them spread around the house in vases. We had someone we paid a small amount to that recorded the wedding. We also knew some friends that had 35mm cameras and took good photos. We bought them all plenty of film and they took the photos. My husband recorded a tape of music for the wedding. We had a modest cake made by a local bakery. After the ceremony we just all had champagne and cake and then opened our gifts. Our wedding rings to each other were nice. We spend the most on the wedding rings and the honeymoon in Hawaii, but our wedding itself was very inexpensive.
Why would you go into debt and start your marriage in debt ? To me it seems like a recipe for disaster. My sister decided to just have a reception and a justice of the peace wedding and she spent about 4,000 for the receptions which includes renting the venue and her honeymoon was in vegas which was about a 1000 for airfare and hotel. You know what is so funny my aunt's wedding was 250,000 and she is still paying that off and she is divorced now
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).... the groom got her an antique heirloom style ring from an antique dealer for around $250. She rented her gown. They filled a small church that rented to them for next to nothing, with tons of wildflowers found all around the area, and candles. Cake was done by Sam's Club, photography by a relative who was luckily somewhat skilled. Reception afterward was just a combination of catering from several lower priced restaurants nearby.
