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oh he knows now... well, when we did it he didn't tell/ask me anything, it came much later, he was wondering because well, the issue when you lie about that (beside lying at all) is that if you pretend to be experienced, the guy is going to expect something, and i didn't know what to do, so... he got the truth out of our first time and my shyness with the act in itself.
Most men don't care if a 22 year old woman is a virgin. Now, if you are waiting for marriage, that's an entirely different story-most men probably wont date you.
Girls are like apples...
Someone would eventually. I know of some well to do Catholic families where the women in them still wait they have no problem finding a high quality, high status male either.
I am a 22 year old girl and even though people tell me I'm pretty, men look at me quite a bit and I get hit on, I never had a real bf and I am still a virgin. I've had occasions in the past but I just never did anything about it because I don't want my first time to be with someone that I either don't truly love or that I love but doesn't really love me... I don't want it to be a casual hook up either. I'm quite shy I must admit, it can take me a bit of time to feel really comfortable with a guy, and I'm also not a girly-girl who falls in love every 2 months and within a few days. Even when I'm attracted and troubled by a guy, I need to take the time to get to know him, to become friend with him, to discover the small details that distinguishes him from the others to develop solid romantic feelings and be able to start a relationship. I think time, a bit of longing, make the feelings way more intense, so why sleeping with a charming guy you've met very recently when you could wait a few weeks or more and make all the sensations way stronger ? I am not religious at all, just romantic, maybe a bit too much, but I just want my first time to be with someone special to whom I will also be special. Anyways, I'm now 22 and getting a bit tired of waiting for love... am I being too idealistic and romantic, should I just stop making a big deal about this and go for a guy I'm not necessarily that thrilled about ? I don't want to... but I'm also a bit worried about what would a guy I like and date think of me still being a virgin.
What would you guys think if you'd meet a girl from my age, kind of like her and start dating her, and discover she is still a virgin ? How would you react ? Would it be a turn-off, or would you be glad she wants to give it to you ? Thanks in advance !
Probably the same I'd think of a 22 yr old non-virgin ....but would feel a whole lot more respect for this person
Probably the same I'd think of a 22 yr old non-virgin ....but would feel a whole lot more respect for this person
Interesting. You would have more respect for the virgin? Why? What if she doesn't find you worthy to deflower her? You would respect her even more? You just might. And many others besides. And THAT friends is how we get 40 y.o. virgins. Now no one respects a 40 y.o. virgin, but EVERY 40 y.o. virgin was once 22 and it was fine then... ... or was it...
Interesting. You would have more respect for the virgin? Why? What if she doesn't find you worthy to deflower her? You would respect her even more? You just might. And many others besides. And THAT friends is how we get 40 y.o. virgins. Now no one respects a 40 y.o. virgin, but EVERY 40 y.o. virgin was once 22 and it was fine then... ... or was it...
And did you ever consider that not everyone has any interest whatsoever in getting laid by accident? That some of us are just waiting for love or the right person, and that doesn't happen for everyone before age 30.
I get that someone for whom it hasn't happened at 30 will say that, but that does not mean that they are correct. I am with my partner of over 10 years because she responded to my polite inquiry as to her possible interest. This was on a dating site and her response was made with a short letter composed of well constructed English sentences. I had no idea she was the right person or not. I could not know if she was the right person or not. Nor could she know anything definite about me. She was female, and had a pulse, and appeared to be at least Middle Class. The gamble paid off. We read the same books, have the same politics, have the same IQ. We do not have the same education, we are not the same race, and we are not the same religion. If she had made the usual assumptions about men that most women make we would never have met and discovered over the slow unfolding of knowledge about one another just how much we would have in common.
We didn't start out reading the same books. I read books she recommended, and vice versa. She listened to music that I recommended (but not vice versa, lol!) and we have become essentially compatible on most of the fine points of a life together. We had to learn it. It wasn't this happy accident! Some of you want a happy accident where BAM you meet your physical and spirtitual soulmate that finishes your sentences (as do me and mine) and you expect that this can happen just through serendipity. Erm... no, it can't. People learn that at different rates, but those that can't, well they become 40 and single. Those who have other constraints besides unrealistic expectations are also virginal as well as being over 40.
I've been with a fair number of women. I've lost count really. The age of their first experience came up in all the long term relationships. Sooner or later you get around to talking about it. I can't recall a single one of them that hadn't had sex by age 16. Not a single one. And I'm old. And I'm Middle Class. So are all of my ex's. Quality women in other words. Good educations. Good jobs. No longer virgins after 16. Even the religious ones. I'm just one guy and my personal experience may not count for much but I have a feeling that someone 30 who hasn't ever even once, found anyone that they could date, isn't going to.
Vulgar? Ah... I see... you are being literal. I was not. I assumed you were male. I am assuming the o.p. meant for the answers to come from males. But even as a female my point is that the automatic elevation of virginity does virgins a diservice. No one tells them when its time to shift gears. Because there is no agreement among the different factions of humanity as when its time to shift gears. If you don't shift out of first at the right level of RPM's you damage the engine. If a young person doesn't shift out of first at the right age they suffer damage of a different sort.
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