Looking Younger Than Your Age (dating, women, loving, family)
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If you read online dating profiles, you'll often see people say they look younger than their age. And I'm sure a lot of those people truly believe it. But the more I read it, the more it comes across as insecurity. Don't apologize for your age. Don't add a qualifier to it. I'm 45, but look younger. Really? According to who. Your friends who might just be saying that to be nice? Your family who don't want you to feel old? The waiter who just wants a big tip?
I get told I'm younger than I look. Fairly often actually. And while it's flattering, I no longer take those comments seriously. I've come to terms with my age. When I look in the mirror, I see someone who looks very much his age. And I know that when it comes to age, women have it harder. Online, they might shave a year or two off their age to show up in someone's search results. So on top of that, you have many women trying to downplay their age. Over and over on this and similar forums, I hear women say the most attractive quality in a man is confidence. Well guess what. Us men find confidence attractive as well. Or rather, we find insecurity unattractive. So now when I see a woman's profile that says "people tell me I look younger than my age" or someone tries to set me up with a friend and says "she looks younger than her age," I actually become less interested.
I'm 5'8" and sometimes feel insecure about it. Should I say that I'm 5'8" but look taller? LOL.
I think that because of modern medicine and technology people in their 40's are much younger then people in their 40's in the past. I think that is why people say they look younger because they have that old mind set of what someone is like in their 40's. For example when I think of someone in their 40's I think of Ward Cleaver, Beaver's dad from Leave it to Beaver, and this is not the 1950's and people in their 40's do not act like that. So I call the 40's the new 20's. Its has nothing to do with insecurity, I am 40 and do not hide my age, but the reality of living in 2013.
I get told constantly, by everyone I reveal my age to, just how surprised they are.
A new friend actually thought I was in my 20s when she met me...I'm nearly 50.
Baby faced, fun loving and healthy. Even doctors raise their eyebrows. It's mainly genetic, my sibs are the same.
Mind you, it's not in any profile I've ever made, how dumb. It's all about how you act not how many wrinkles you have. I know 20 year olds who may as well be 98.
Last edited by cindersslipper; 08-31-2013 at 04:13 PM..
Some people do look younger than their years. It's a combination of genetics, taking care of themselves, staying out of the sun and not smoking, etc. In many cases though, if you look closely enough there are usually signs of actual age if you know what and where to look for them. I am often told I look younger than my age, especially compared to most of my peers - and even my doctor says so.
Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
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Everyone tells me I have a babyface so instead of looking like my actual age of 25, most assume I'm closer to 19 or 20, even though I'm 6'5 and have gray hair.
I think that because of modern medicine and technology people in their 40's are much younger then people in their 40's in the past. I think that is why people say they look younger because they have that old mind set of what someone is like in their 40's. For example when I think of someone in their 40's I think of Ward Cleaver, Beaver's dad from Leave it to Beaver, and this is not the 1950's and people in their 40's do not act like that. So I call the 40's the new 20's. Its has nothing to do with insecurity, I am 40 and do not hide my age, but the reality of living in 2013.
Really good point.
As on another thread a few months back, it was discussed people are not dressing or looking like what the perceived look for that age has usually been. I think it was mentioned that when a person used to think of a woman in ltheir late 50's for example, you might think of them as having short white hair in tight curls, wearing elastic waisted pants, etc. But they tend to do not do that anymore.
And as Josseppie says, Ward Cleaver might have been a typical person in their 40's at once, but not anymore. People in their 40's tend to not act that way, maybe they wear cargo pants and t-shirts on the weekends and drink beer and go mountain biking with their friends and have a more modern hairstyle.
Quote:
Originally Posted by The Dissenter
Everyone tells me I have a babyface so instead of looking like my actual age of 25, most assume I'm closer to 19 or 20, even though I'm 6'5 and have gray hair.
Me too. I don't necessarily consider this good, I don't really want to look younger because of a babyface. I got ID'd twice for a lottery ticket this past summer; I just turned 37, I think that's a bit ridiculous.
As on another thread a few months back, it was discussed people are not dressing or looking like what the perceived look for that age has usually been. I think it was mentioned that when a person used to think of a woman in ltheir late 50's for example, you might think of them as having short white hair in tight curls, wearing elastic waisted pants, etc. But they tend to do not do that anymore.
And as Josseppie says, Ward Cleaver might have been a typical person in their 40's at once, but not anymore. People in their 40's tend to not act that way, maybe they wear cargo pants and t-shirts on the weekends and drink beer and go mountain biking with their friends and have a more modern hairstyle.
You just described my style most of the time. Well I don't drink during the week and when I do drink its not beer, yuck, but take last night. I was at the Colorado State fair in Pueblo having adult beverages and having a great time. Today I did go to work but I am again going to the fair tonight and will see a concert and drink then hang out with my bf. Then again I don't have any kids so that helps me live the life like a 20 yo more then a average 40 yo, even today.
People are constantly angling for advantages in the dating world. Self-described "looking younger" is just another scheme for advancing one's candidacy, attempting to exude vigor, confidence and optimistic effervescence. Because it's subjective, it can't be impugned for being an outright lie, such as adding inches to one's height, or subtracting years from one's actual age.
The connotation of "looking younger" goes beyond health an appearance. It implies an attitude of not being tied down, of being refreshingly unconventional. The irony is that everyone aims to be unconventional, everyone aims to trumpet their individualism and uniqueness. So we end up with a crowd of unique people, all autonomous individuals stampeding in exactly the same direction.
If you read online dating profiles, you'll often see people say they look younger than their age. And I'm sure a lot of those people truly believe it. But the more I read it, the more it comes across as insecurity. Don't apologize for your age. Don't add a qualifier to it. I'm 45, but look younger. Really? According to who. Your friends who might just be saying that to be nice? Your family who don't want you to feel old? The waiter who just wants a big tip?
I get told I'm younger than I look. Fairly often actually. And while it's flattering, I no longer take those comments seriously. I've come to terms with my age. When I look in the mirror, I see someone who looks very much his age. And I know that when it comes to age, women have it harder. Online, they might shave a year or two off their age to show up in someone's search results. So on top of that, you have many women trying to downplay their age. Over and over on this and similar forums, I hear women say the most attractive quality in a man is confidence. Well guess what. Us men find confidence attractive as well. Or rather, we find insecurity unattractive. So now when I see a woman's profile that says "people tell me I look younger than my age" or someone tries to set me up with a friend and says "she looks younger than her age," I actually become less interested.
I'm 5'8" and sometimes feel insecure about it. Should I say that I'm 5'8" but look taller? LOL.
I would say that I look my age. There are, however, a lot of people out there who look TERRIBLE for their age, so I guess comparatively speaking, I look pretty good. Like you said, it's all subjective and really unimportant anyway.
I think I look younger than my age - not by a lot but by a little. Still doesn't change the fact that I'm 37!
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