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Thank you for that. I guess on here I was looking for a little bit of justification on how I felt as well, so again, thanks. Thats exactly how I feel–glued to my phone.
All of this is just in time for Valentines Day, right? Fml. haha. Thanks for your support I appreciate it. And out of everyone you have given me a good idea of what I could possibly say to him. I'm just so nervous to break the poor guys heart. He doesn't deserve it, but I guess that is life. I do love him a lot, just don't feel 'in love' anymore.
Life is never fair. As long as you can accept someone breaking your heart, if it was to ever happen in the future, than all is fair.
I'm an introvert so the level of texting and contact your BF engages in sounds like a nightmare to me. LOL. That would drive me nuts! So I do understand.
You are young and you need some space. There is nothing wrong with how you are feeling. You want to go figure out who you are, and you need room to breathe in order to do it.
I would HATE someone contacting me that much. Most people would feel smothered by that level of contact. You are young. Your boyfriend may be a wonderful guy, but IMO you just have too many other things you want to experience before you settle down. There's nothing wrong with that.
I would HATE someone contacting me that much. Most people would feel smothered by that level of contact. You are young. Your boyfriend may be a wonderful guy, but IMO you just have too many other things you want to experience before you settle down. There's nothing wrong with that.
Haha, right? It can be really intense. I don't like using my phone all that much so its definitely a lot to deal with. The only part he doesn't understand, is why I can't continue to be in a relationship with him while having these new experiences (we have gone over this very lightly in the past). He had a good point, but just could not wrap his mind around on why I would want to break up to live my life. And obviously we did not end up breaking up… theres the resentment everyone keeps mentioning. I just can't put together the right words for him yet.
No wonder–this is the only post I've ever done. But for example in regards to what you said about moving to NYC… I want to do something drastic like that. I don't think my bf would be able to accept it! I would be around a whole new world and new people and it would most likely upset him a lot that he can't be there. Just more strings tied down that I am not into.
As I said in the PM definitely time to move on and don't worry about support we are here for ya and I am sure your friends will ultimately be more understanding with time.
That's a profound statement and it's coming from a place where you aren't wanting to party or hookup. It's coming from a place to where you just realized you two have really grown apart. He's sweet and awesome, but your goals no longer line up. You want to be your own woman, not the woman who's glued to her phone keeping up with the boyfriend. I say do what's best for you and best for him. That's breaking up. it will hurt, but it will get better.
^^^This.
In your early 20s, you are still growing into the person you're going to be, brain development isn't yet complete. To have been in a LTR since high school, the feelings of wanting to grow and go in separate directions aren't uncommon for the age group. This is all exacerbated by the distance, and his clinginess.
It will be tough to break up, it is never an easy process, but based on the information shared, I think she is doing the right thing.
Military life doesn't work for all women. But do me a favor, please do not break up with him while he is out on a mission. At least wait for the mission to be finished.
Military life doesn't work for all women. But do me a favor, please do not break up with him while he is out on a mission. At least wait for the mission to be finished.
As long as she does it over the phone instead of letter or text I think it is fine. At least he will not come back happy as hell to see her only to realize that they are breaking up. That for me would be more heartbreaking then finding out on a mission. I come from a military family so I am kind of aware of the feelings of returning home and the feelings when out with the unit.
Military life doesn't work for all women. But do me a favor, please do not break up with him while he is out on a mission. At least wait for the mission to be finished.
He is just doing some schooling and his regular job right now. His job won't deploy him either. He spends a lot of his time bored, and that is also a factor in his clinginess.
My boyfriend and I have been together since highschool, for about 3 or 4 years now. We broke up once for about six months when I found out he was joining the Air Force, but we ended up getting back together 2 months before he left for BMT. We wrote letters the whole time, I was crazy about him again, and it was romantic every time I would fly to visit him.
Now, it is a year later. This man does so very much for me. Pays for hotel rooms, cars, food, gifts, etc. when I go to visit him. Showers me with unconditional love every time I see him. Texts me all day, always wants to Skype. Brags to everybody about how lucky he is to have me.
But I have major guilty feelings going on lately... I just don't feel the same anymore. I feel as though I'm with him partially because I "owe it to him" now, which is the last reason a relationship should stay together. I don't know what went wrong*– he has been nothing but great to me. I am just not as attracted to him as I used to be, I don't have any passionate feelings anymore, and feel annoyed as he constantly texts me.
I don't know how to break any of this to him. I care for him so much still, and don't want to break his heart but I know it is inevitable. Any ideas on how to take on this hard subject?
Thank you.
Whats the issue? The real problem was you wanting to get back together with him before he joined the air force. Long distance relationships dont work. Period.
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Thanks for your support I appreciate it. And out of everyone you have given me a good idea of what I could possibly say to him. I'm just so nervous to break the poor guys heart. He doesn't deserve it, but I guess that is life. I do love him a lot, just don't feel 'in love' anymore.
