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I know the feeling of having an overextended guest but it got on my nerves so bad, I blew my top. Don't let it go that far with you.
Everyone's entitled to there opinion and he probably thinks that since the hubby and him are good friends that everyone is mature enough to hear everyone else's opinions. He probably doesn't think it annoys you. Since he is so open and free flowing with his mouth, then you should do the same. Tell him you feel uncomfortable talking about some subjects, or if it was me, I would leave the room and find something else to do. I would also have another talk with hubby and let him know his stay is starting to be a little long. The end of January is a long time to put up with someone like that.
Hey Foma, does he ever go home to visit his family?
Not yet but I think the fam is coming for Christmas, which is also kind of weird b'c Hubby and I will be gone and there is going to be a family in our house. Even though it's odd, at least we'll have housesitters so I don't have to worry about security issues. They are good people so that's why I'm trying to stay calm about everything ya know?
I don't know why but I was just really annoyed. You are in my home as my guest eating my food and sleeping in the bed that I own using up my water and my electricity (which he's one of those that doesn't turn off the lights!)
Yep, it's disrespectful. If I was at someone's house that long, and I didn't agree with their political or religious views, I would just smile and keep my mouth shut. I'd also be buying a lot of groceries, cooking, and making the coffee every morning. Tell hubby you need your space back and his buddy needs to be out in a week. He can get a hotel somewhere.
Did someone say till end of January? No. This is too long.
You're a good person, Foma. I think you just need to start drinking and don't stop until they leave.
lol pirate girl ... i don't want to become an alkie!!!! (he doesn't drink so i'm sure i'll be judged if he sees me downing a cup of crowne every night!)
You have my sympathy, it can be really infuriating. When I have been in that position it has felt like an ethical dilemma because I always feel like my home is a sort of sacrosanct space and I am a lot pickier about who is in my home, than say out in the world because my home is my haven. My mother-in-law was like that on the same issue (homophobic, and other outspoken hateful views) and it was sooooo hard for me to stomach. Part of me felt like I truly didn't want that hatefulness exuded in my home. ANother part of me felt torn with the family ties. What I really wanted was my husband to stand up to her and say "We find that offensive, please don't speak that way in our home" which he never did. This went on for the whole 12 years of the marriage. My primary strategy is to avoid those sorts of people and discussions but in your own home that is hard. Good luck. At least he will be out soon.....not soon enough....but eventually.
Homes aren't exactly flying off the market.... Once they get a contract, there is still the lag time until closing with inspections, etc.....There needs to be a time certain. Even unbearable situations are more managable when there is an end in sight.
I think I would scheme with your girlfriend....have her plan a trip to visit mid-January. You can tell him and your DH all about it when you return from LA and suggest that when his family is down for Christmas, they could help him secure a short-term rental.
And come mid-January, when he is out, your friend can call and cancel her plans.
Heck, just tell them that the CD caravan is coming to your town mid-January and we will be staying at your place!
Even unbearable situations are more managable when there is an end in sight.
EXACTLY. I think what's really bothering me is I told Hubby I don't care how long Guest stays (within reason), I just need a DATE. That is the one thing I asked for and he did not deliver and I am P*SSED. We were in a similar situation about a year ago - though he was the one more annoyed than me - you'd think he'd learn his lesson by now!
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I think I would scheme with your girlfriend
The problem is, I am a horrible "liar". It's just not in me to scheme! Missing gene perhaps?! Anyway, I'm going to talk to hubby when we get a chance to be alone. I need a "due date" and if he doesn't give it to me, I will ask myself. I just feel like a b*tch doing it but if Hubby won't, then I will. There's a reason why I haven't done it sooner - I'm learning to be a "partner" in the marriage rather than a "authoritarian", stupid self-improvement crap - but my patience has been tested!
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Heck, just tell them that the CD caravan is coming to your town mid-January and we will be staying at your place!
HAHAHAHA ... I would laugh my ass off if I had to say that with a straight face!!
I loved how you used the acronym GLBT and then spelled it out just under it!!
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