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Oh boy, I can imagine some of the responses I'll get from some of you on this. Well, here goes...
I have a romantic interest who wants me to come visit on short notice. There's this event she wants to go to and she apparently doesn't have anyone local to go with. So she has offered to pay half of my airfare if I choose to fly out. She has already purchased the event tickets, so that would be part of the deal.
We've had one date when she was in town, but we've been talking for several weeks now over the phone. This individual is trying to relocate to where I currently live (that was her plan before we met). I'd love to go visit her and join her at this event. However, I don't know that I'm particularly comfortable with accepting her overture for paying half the fare. And at this point, the airline tickets are quite pricey (especially to justify for a short weekend trip), thus I'm not too eager to drop the full amount of the ticket because I already have some big plans this month (family coming in from out of town) that were planned months prior to this. My hangup is that we don't know each other all that well and if things didn't work out for whatever reason, I'd hate to have this on my conscience.
Thoughts? Would you accept the offer and see where it goes? Would you politely decline the offer and continue to pursue it over the phone until hopefully this person moves out here?
You said "I'd love to go visit her and join her at this event." So go. If I offered a guy to pay half of the trip to come see me, it would be sincere and I would not hold it against him for taking me up on my offer. *You* are also spending a fair sum of money to go see her, so it's not one-sided. If you do not take her up on her offer, it would more likely seem that you are not that interested. I would really go if you think there's good potential there.
She's being reasonable, from her perspective. She needs an escort to the event. So she's willing to help out and pay half. She knows it would be too much to ask for you to pay 100% of the ticket, especially since she's the one issuing the invitation, and in need of someone to escort her. This is very fair and square.
What would be on your conscience, exactly? Her generosity? Look at it from a practical standpoint (as outlined above). She's just trying to solve a problem. There are no strings attached, she just needs a friend to accompany her. The occasion would double as a good opportunity to get to know her better, like a simple date, which she's also thinking, probably.
She's being reasonable, from her perspective. She needs an escort to the event. So she's willing to help out and pay half. She knows it would be too much to ask for you to pay 100% of the ticket, especially since she's the one issuing the invitation, and in need of someone to escort her. This is very fair and square.
What would be on your conscience, exactly? Her generosity? Look at it from a practical standpoint (as outlined above). She's just trying to solve a problem. There are no strings attached, she just needs a friend to accompany her. The occasion would double as a good opportunity to get to know her better, like a simple date, which she's also thinking, probably.
Where would your lodging be? Guest room? Hotel?
My hangup is that if things don't work out, I'd feel sort of guilty for accepting such a generous gift. I just typically feel weird about things like this. I personally don't like accepting large gifts (even from my parents). And this one in particular is from someone whom I've met in person just once.
Also, I've never had an offer like this, so I just wasn't sure how to deal with it. It's very generous on her part. She also seems very interested in me. I'm excited about the idea of it. I just wasn't sure if this is something that most people would advocate. We're talking a few hundred dollars here.
Personally, I would feel much better purchasing my own airfare, but gladly accepting the event ticket- if I wanted to go.
If it was me, I'd politely decline and wait for a different opportunity to present itself.
The choice is yours.
This was my original thought. I personally don't want to drop the $600 or so on the roundtrip airfare at this point (for a three day trip), because I have family coming in to town this month and I planned on splurging on them. But she has been pushing hard the past few days to get me to come out. In her words, "it'd be the nicest thing anyone has done for her". And here I'm thinking it's probably the nicest thing anyone has offered to do for me.
You are damned if you do and damned if you don't in dating these days. Pay half, don't pay, offer to pay half..etc. Holy crappoli, I wouldn't be able to keep up with all the "rules"..LOL
If you want to see her, then go, and allow her to pay for half of your airfare. She's offering to pay it, which means she wants your company. If you can swing being out of town for a weekend, then go!
Hmmm...that's a hard one considering you've only gone out once. However, you must've made quite the impression if she is willing to pay for 1/2 your ticket to come spend the weekend with her and go to this event. If you want to go..GO! If it doesn't work out, send her a check for $300 in the mail....conscience cleared!
What I'm hearing is, I don't like this person enough to be spending this amount of money on her, even if she is offering to pay half. I would kindly refuse her request and just plan for a better opportunity to meet up. Of course you should realize if you turn her down, she may lose a significant amount of interest in you because you are unwilling to take a chance with her.
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