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the cheating is pretty bad but - giving you responsibility at a young age to get 3 people home safely....
I think most of the time people do the best they can..... In the story in your OP though, he was being completely selfish.
He was...
Like I said, he was probably on a 3 day drunk and while I'm not making excuses for him, alcohol mushes the brain after a bit... I think being on that 3 day drunk is probably the only reason he did what he did.
I guess I just find it so odd that of all the regrets he had, he didn't mention his infidelity and how he exposed me to it as not being a bad thing.
That is the part that bothers me... the lack of moral compass and complete irreverence for cheating on his wife, and the lack of concern about setting a good example for his son.
My parents both were narcissist... I don't understand where my moral compass came from... it must have been from their lack of compass... I guess........
Speaking of narcissism... I feel a bit narcissistic in this thread talking about myself so much.... I don't mean to..........
Last edited by Chowhound; 03-22-2015 at 01:52 AM..
Sorry for your parents. I went through similar with my parents. I never met or say any girlfriends or boyfriends. But I had my suspicions about my father, then my mother git them too. But I wasn't heavily involved with that.
My mother had an affair with a man who was no good, and she admitted to it, saying she was already considering leaving by that point. She tells me she did not sleep with him, but was in fact dating him. Now my father thinks they slept together who he was pissed.
Really seemed both of them were a mess. I was in my teens, but it was 17-19 I believe. I still feel a bit awkward as I kinda expected more maturity from both of them, but we're still good. They're still married, but it seems with my mother, she loves my father, finds him attractive, but states living with him is difficult because he's too immature with the drinking, wanting to spend alot of money, buying all these pets he doesn't half take care of, and his horrible skill at washing clothes because he loads the machine too full, and the clothes still stink and are dirty when he's done with them. He also is stubborn and tends to think he knows everything. So he can be incorrigible most of the time. He's not a bad guy-dangerous or hateful. But very childish and sensitive.
I recently had the opportunity to reconnect with my Dad this past July after roughly 16 years of no contact. To make a long story short, my Mom gave me the number of his girlfriend and told me if I wanted to that I could call her anytime. So I did. Talked to his girlfriend for a little bit. She told me that my Dad had a stroke, which my mother had already informed me of. She asked if I wanted to talk to my Dad and I said I rather wait and keep it to a face to face meeting. I wasn't looking for my Dad to be a Dad, since we're past that point. I was looking for him to be a friend at best and see that I still made it in life, whether he was in my life or not.
The girlfriend stated that my Dad could acknowledge that she was talking to me on the phone and that he would get back in contact with me to schedule a time to meet up. I was feeling emotions of happiness, sadness, and overall nervousness about the situation. It was a tearful night of joy and sadness. This was back in July and I never got a call from the number again. After a month I just balled the number up and threw it away.
After that, I decided that if you can't give your own Dad a chance to reconnect, why should I allow so many other people chances in my life. Sadly, I still allow people to have too many chances in my life till this day. Maybe I expect better out of people, even though I know they only want to show me their worst. Sometimes it's tough being an adult, because my Dad missed the opportunity to teach me so many things. In the end, my Dad wasn't up for parenthood.
My Mom remarried and I had a stepdad for about 4 years but he was pretty physically and emotionally abusive, so my experience of men in my life as father figures is pretty crappy!
Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
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Well, my dad probably ran around on my mom. Nothing will ever be confirmed since he died 4 years ago and took details of their marriage to the grave with him. The type of person he was, I am inclined to believe my moms suspicions. He couldn't put the damn bottle down long enough to be a decent dad consistently so I should not be surprised he could not keep his damn pants zipped either.
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the cheating is pretty bad but - giving you responsibility at a young age to get 3 people home safely....
.... I don't mean to..........
