Why don't more women have compassion on shy men (boyfriends, affairs, relative)
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I don't think women write shy guys off because they want to be mean or to put the shy guys down. I think they write them off simply because they are not attracted to them, and you can't force attraction. There are very different kinds of women and men; I am sure there are women who are more into shy guys.
I personally am not too much into someone who is always shy, because in my book a shy guy is not intimidating enough to the others, and if we were to get cornered by some bad guys, the shy guy would probably plead for mercy and then get beat up instead of kind of seizing control of the situation. I know this is an extreme example, but i really think who we are attracted to is ingrained in evolution to some extent. In a crisis, I don't want to be the only one who has to do the talking and the negotiating, and with a shy guy, I don't see it being otherwise. Just my two cents.
Even if a person is not shy, they could still easily plead for mercy in an extreme and rare situation as that.
I think it's kind of foolish to base someone's attraction based on something like that.
I don't think women write shy guys off because they want to be mean or to put the shy guys down. I think they write them off simply because they are not attracted to them, and you can't force attraction. There are very different kinds of women and men; I am sure there are women who are more into shy guys.
I personally am not too much into someone who is always shy, because in my book a shy guy is not intimidating enough to the others, and if we were to get cornered by some bad guys, the shy guy would probably plead for mercy and then get beat up instead of kind of seizing control of the situation. I know this is an extreme example, but i really think who we are attracted to is ingrained in evolution to some extent. In a crisis, I don't want to be the only one who has to do the talking and the negotiating, and with a shy guy, I don't see it being otherwise. Just my two cents.
How did you get that from her stating she wants him to do the talking and negotiating with her instead of her being the only one
I read the bolded part of her sentence. Seriously, if you don't like shy men just don't date them. Most likely they don't care anyways. I sure wouldn't care if a woman disliked me because I was shy. Her loss because under this quiet exterior I'm awesome
So say you are out somewhere ... you see a girl wearing your a t-shirt from a band you like. There you go ... it a connection on some level. You just can back from Germany and you see a girl hold a travel magazine about Germany ... there you go a perfect opportunity to strike up a conversation. It does not have to start of romantic or flirty. It can just be friendly and causal and if more of a connections happens then great. If not then you just had a conversation with someone with some similar interest which is good too. I am not taking about oh she wears Dior and like Dior. Though I love perfume and I would strike up a conversation in a heart beat with a guys if I liked the scent he was wearing. Everyone is different, but conversations can start in variety of ways.
What if the woman is 90 or 14 years old wearing the t shirt or reading the magazine ? Sorry, I'm not buying this.
You guys are saying physical attraction/appearance plays no role in determining an approach? just nonsense.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by hawaiiancoconut
What if the woman is 90 or 14 years old wearing the t shirt or reading the magazine ? Sorry, I'm not buying this.
You guys are saying physical attraction/appearance plays no role in determining an approach? just nonsense.
I'll walk up to a dude, or a 55 yo woman, or 19 yo girl or whatever wearing a cool band/brewery/whatever shirt, sure. That's a reason to talk to them, do it fairly frequently. It would be even more interesting if it was a 80 yo woman or man as it would be more unusual.
Quote:
Originally Posted by klmrocks
So say you are out somewhere ... you see a girl wearing your a t-shirt from a band you like. There you go ... it a connection on some level. You just can back from Germany and you see a girl hold a travel magazine about Germany ... there you go a perfect opportunity to strike up a conversation. It does not have to start of romantic or flirty. It can just be friendly and causal and if more of a connections happens then great. If not then you just had a conversation with someone with some similar interest which is good too. I am not taking about oh she wears Dior and like Dior. Though I love perfume and I would strike up a conversation in a heart beat with a guys if I liked the scent he was wearing. Everyone is different, but conversations can start in variety of ways.
I would talk to that person whether they be male or female, cute or not cute. A perfume though would probably make me detour west. That is what I do. I talk to people for the sake of talking to people.
I mean, lets say I'm at a bar and there a dudes on either side of me and we're chatting about music or football and having a decent time... and a cute chick (dime a dozen) sits further down the bar with an empty seat next to them. Am I going to get all creepy like they do in the movies or TV and pick up my drink and move down and sit down next to her? Heck the F no. Women notice that sheet a mile a way and are (from the ones I know) freaked out about it. Plus, I have no reason to sit next to her at that point.
Quote:
Originally Posted by klmrocks
It is kind of cool to know guys can actually be a bit more deep lol. They do exist ! I am not saying thinking that way is a bad thing because I actually think it is a good thing. You seem to be more interesting in finding the ONE vs. the one night stand. Interesting hearing that from a man.
Well of course I would like the ONE (if such a thing exists), but my last good relationship started as a ONS that didn't end for close to a year. I'm hardly adverse to them, its just that I don't look for them. It's much easier to just text a FB or FWB if relief is needed.
Last edited by timberline742; 11-17-2015 at 06:17 AM..
What if the woman is 90 or 14 years old wearing the t shirt or reading the magazine ? Sorry, I'm not buying this.
You guys are saying physical attraction/appearance plays no role in determining an approach? just nonsense.
Of course physical attraction plays a huge role. If an adult is that socially off to be trying to pick a 14 year old they should be aware there are laws against that. Regarding the 90 years old... well to each his own. Some people do carry their age better then others, but logically do not be planning to get a long term relationship **** out of that situation. Why would you approach someone you are not physically attracted too if you are looking to meet someone to start a romantic relationship.
Regarding shy guys I have personally had the experiences where Mr Shy was so sweet and nice when we first met and was treating me like gold, but as soon as I started to express the same level of interest in him he started to become full of himself and not treat me that great any more. I would maintain it is better to be with someone who likes you more then you like them or at least equally. Can't be too compassionate with anyone shy or not.
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! I am not saying thinking that way is a bad thing because I actually think it is a good thing. You seem to be more interesting in finding the ONE vs. the one night stand. Interesting hearing that from a man.
Odd example ....
