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I did... I thought it's the social norm to sit down for that long and I did try not to talk and there's just awkward silence. I was waiting for his cue to finish the meet but he'd try reluctantly to continue the conversation..
You never know. Some people are really bad at expressing themselves verbally, while others are really bad at picking up social cues and reading body language.
If he had sat there politely for an hour, and then left, you might have mistakenly thought he was into you.
That happened to me once. I'm sure I told the story, he was so intelligent laid back and down to earth....so I thought.
He was into photography, I like to paint nature scenes. He talked about going for a walk at night in a state park, watching the stars on the bridge over the river. Sent me some pictures. That's so interesting to me and something I'd like, I said. But not for a first meeting, can we do lunch first, or drinks? He said sure, mentioned a fast food place, and I thought 'what the hell, I'm not a snob, maybe he likes it there'.
I drove up and noticed a guy walking from the bus stop down the highway with a backpack. I went in and ordered a drink and sat down. The back pack guy walked in and talked to the people behind the counter, he got a free drink... because he used to work there. He walked over to my table and introduced himself. He took the bus bc he didn't have a car. He didn't mention work previously bc he was now unemployed. When he mentioned the state park where he lived, I thought he meant nearby....I think he actually lived in the park at the time though. We were able to talk for a couple of hours actually, he was intelligent, ex-military, with ptsd. Similar to the type of resident I worked with at the State Hospital.
Not a romantic interest, but I can still be respectful. He didn't call me again.
Who knows what your guy was thinking, it's no reflection on you, try try again, it just wasn't a match.
That happened to me once. I'm sure I told the story, he was so intelligent laid back and down to earth....so I thought.
He was into photography, I like to paint nature scenes. He talked about going for a walk at night in a state park, watching the stars on the bridge over the river. Sent me some pictures. That's so interesting to me and something I'd like, I said. But not for a first meeting, can we do lunch first, or drinks? He said sure, mentioned a fast food place, and I thought 'what the hell, I'm not a snob, maybe he likes it there'.
I drove up and noticed a guy walking from the bus stop down the highway with a backpack. I went in and ordered a drink and sat down. The back pack guy walked in and talked to the people behind the counter, he got a free drink... because he used to work there. He walked over to my table and introduced himself. He took the bus bc he didn't have a car. He didn't mention work previously bc he was now unemployed. When he mentioned the state park where he lived, I thought he meant nearby....I think he actually lived in the park at the time though. We were able to talk for a couple of hours actually, he was intelligent, ex-military, with ptsd. Similar to the type of resident I worked with at the State Hospital.
Not a romantic interest, but I can still be respectful. He didn't call me again.
Who knows what your guy was thinking, it's no reflection on you, try try again, it just wasn't a match.
Thank you for sharing your story. I'm just sooo embarrassed that not only I disappointed him, but I also dragged him into a hour-long awkward conversation. He put me in an awkward situation by being silent and I didn't know how to deal with it.
That's how it can go with OLD. Sometimes, you don't find the person attractive at all in-person (compared to their pics).
That being said, he was definitely rude. He could have been polite for like a half-hour, then call it quits.
I can't imagine someone being that different from the pics, unless they were using a 10-yr-old photo, or something. The un-photogenic people often turn out to be better-looking than their pics. IDK how someone could look worse than their pics.
Thank you for sharing your story. I'm just sooo embarrassed that not only I disappointed him, but I also dragged him into a hour-long awkward conversation. He put me in an awkward situation by being silent and I didn't know how to deal with it.
You handled it as best you could. You did the right thing, IMO. And you said you'd have ended it earlier, but occasionally, he'd make the effort to keep the conversation going. So don't beat yourself up. You did what most people would do in that situation: try to make the best of it.
With more experiences you won't feel like you're disappointing anyone. You'll have to try to find some humor in it though, and learn as you go--otherwise you'll end up throwing in the towel before the really great experiences happen. It's an adventure.
I can't imagine someone being that different from the pics, unless they were using a 10-yr-old photo, or something. The un-photogenic people often turn out to be better-looking than their pics. IDK how someone could look worse than their pics.
It can look very different. I've met someone looked nothing like his picture and was disappointed but I managed to sit there for an hour with him to be polite.
This time it's my turn to disappoint someone and I didn't know I was that disappointing. Sure I posted pictures that represent me well but I didn't photoshop or anything..
You handled it as best you could. You did the right thing, IMO. And you said you'd have ended it earlier, but occasionally, he'd make the effort to keep the conversation going. So don't beat yourself up. You did what most people would do in that situation: try to make the best of it.
Had a similar experience, went on a date with someone who seemed cool by texting, but when we got together we had nothing in common. We just ate and then went home our separate ways
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and I did try not to talk and there's just awkward silence. I was waiting for his cue to finish the meet but he'd try reluctantly to continue the conversation..
