Is it me, or this kinda creepy?

[Sonic_Spork]

Originally Posted by ThisTown123

Right, but.... men are men, regardless...getting your male room mate all horned up whilst discussing your deep sex life with him will result in consequences such as what happened here.

Not sure of the outcome, did she move out of the apartment? lol

Dude.

I have discussed my sex life, albeit with an attempt at diplomatic or clinical terms usually, with YOU. Do you think I was "teasing" you in some way?

I've had conversations with men about my sex life, too, in real life contexts, without it feeling flirtatious or like they were taking it as anything but conversation. Now granted there's such a thing as "reading the room" with who you're talking to. But one time I was bored waiting for my car to get worked on, and ended up in a conversation about relationships, sex, even kink, with the owner of the shop for over 2 hours! (We were the only ones in the room, and I had the feeling that he appreciated a diversion from his boring workday.)

I guess part of my thought that I don't assume it's teasing, is that I don't assume that any given man is even into me. Some are, some aren't. Even when I was 18-20 years old and arguably pretty hot, at the TIME I didn't have the ego to think that "duh of course a guy would get horned up and want to get with you." I figured they were capable of being part of a conversation about something without expecting something from it.

I mean hell, I can talk about food I'm craving but don't have in the kitchen, without throwing a fit about it, or what I'd do if I had a million dollars even though I likely never will... The notion of, "No fair making me think about something I might want if I can't have it!" seems very immature, even assuming that some guy does, and not being a mind reader, how would I even know? Especially if he's acting like a "friend" but silently hoping to game his way into my bed.

But back to my earlier thought...it's kind of all about boundaries, no? KNOWINGLY crossing other people's boundaries is jerky. But I do think that in general there are a lot of situations where one might be forgiven for not knowing that a boundary is there. When the woman in your story told the guy that he was being creepy, if he's being clever he could have said, "Uh huh, crossed a boundary, did I? Well, just so you're aware, this whole conversation was kinda crossing my boundaries. Let's not do this again. Thanks."

[stanley-88888888]

Originally Posted by ThisTown123

I just listened to a podcast where a female room mate, that's rooming with a male, was talking about her sex life with other men and the fact she takes nude photos and sends them to men.

He complained about it as if it was TMI, so as a rather horny young bachelor, he took the bait (or was she baiting him?) He took it up a notch, and flirtingly said "You got pics? Send some on over to me!"

She got offended and called him a CREEPER.

That said, it seems a lot of women are over using the word "creepy" when it comes to men, and some have a rather twisted view of a definition.

Coming from a room mate, it's "creepy", but from a strange man on the net, not at all.

Originally Posted by K12144

The difference, of course, being that the other men were her choice, vs. her friend who wanted to decide *for* her who she was going to send pictures to; not to mention the weirdness of wanting nude pictures of a platonic friend. But let's not let something silly like a woman's autonomy get in the way of anything, right?

[i'm a man] thats not creepy. if two single persons are talking about nueds, it would be weird not to inquire about them.

[K12144]

Um.... no. So every time a person mentions something, they have to invite the other person to do it too? Where did you get that from?

[stanley-88888888]

^ are yoo responding to me ? if the subject is trying to get someone to imagine the persons naked body then i presume a little reciprocal flirting is wanted.

i never talk about myself being naked to coworkers or family members or guy friends.