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Hello folks. Possible one of the most overasked qeustion, but I am genuinly interested if I should ask her out second time after first refusal?
Well baisically, she did not straight up said no. After I asked her out in a possibly the most moronic way “ hey do you want to hang out?” She replied that she was verg busy that day but eventually said yes, that we could grab a coffee or lunch together, but unfortunately that very day she wrote that she can’t meet me due to her schedule and maybe this week we could. All I said was okey, as you have free time just message me. Obviously she did not write me that week, but kept messaging me on a random things. Even to this day we have very good relationship. But the thing is, once, she refered me to, as a “friend”. I was going through a tough time and she said, I’ll be with you friend. That’s understandable that she does not see me anything more than a friend, but I want to make clear of my intentions that I like her. Now I was thinking of asking her out on a drink, not on a coffee or a lunch, but straight up for drinks and speak with her. I am just interested if it’s a good idea or not. I know first time she politely refused and I most certainly don’t want to seem like a creep, but is it worth? If she says no this time a well, well I will be certain that we will stay just “ friends”
Sorry for such long as* post and for my English
Sure, you should try asking (or should I say texting) her to see if she wants to go out for drinks. If she hesitates once again and doesn't offer any alternatives, and never gets back to you about it, then you have your answer.
It's pretty obvious she sees you only as a (texting/online) friend, but if asking her out again means you'll have closure, then do it.
Ask her is she wants to go on date. Use the word date. Do not say hang out or meet up. Make it abundantly clear what you want.
Agreed.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Liuns fork
I don’t really want to use word date at this moment really, if she agrees I’ll tell her in person as it is. I’ll ask her out
She is treating you as a friend right now and you need to change how she is percieving you. You are trying to figure out if this woman could see you as a potential romatic partner. You need to ask her out on a date to both clarify both your intentions and her's.
She is treating you as a friend right now and you need to change how she is percieving you. You are trying to figure out if this woman could see you as a potential romatic partner. You need to ask her out on a date to both clarify both your intentions and her's.
And she should know from the start that OP is asking her out on a date. It's not cool for her to think she's grabbing a drink with a pal, only to have him drop that his intentions were always romantic while she's sitting there. Let her know upfront so she can make an informed choice.
Do you ever see her in real life? That would be a good time to ask her out. But have a plan. Example: I would like to try _____ restaurant. (or golfing, a movie, dog show, whatever) Would you be interested in going with me? If she says yes, the ask her what day would suit her best. If she says no, or otherwise expresses being busy forevermore, accept your spot in the friend zone.
I don’t really want to use word date at this moment really, if she agrees I’ll tell her in person as it is. I’ll ask her out
I don’t know… my future husband formally asked me on a “date”, which seemed awfully old fashioned at the time. My friends sort of swooned at the romance of it, LOL.
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