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OK people time to share tips for all the nice guys who find themselves finishing last with girls. What can they do if they don't want to radically alter their personalities or put on a completely fake front to get girls? What little things can they do to add enough of an edge to attract the kind of women they long for in their lives?
Heres a tip. Have you considered that the kind of women you long for are not the women that you are compatable with and that you might want to try getting to know nice girls who you dont have fake it infront of or try to change them.
All the discussion about how all girls want bad boys then try to change them into nice sensitive guys. It seem like the guys are after the hot, shallow witches then want to change them into nice, humble girls.
#8 - In fact, just don't worry about anything, period.
This is the most important way from changing the nice guy image. A nice guy spends too much time worrying about whether she is having a good time or not and whether she likes him or not, etc. Stop worrying, be yourself, make her worry about whether you like her.
Just like the great Bob Marley said "Don't worry about a thing"
I left this one last because it's a bit complicated. Most guys are terrified of groups of girls, they want to get girls alone because a) rejection is less painful and b) one girl is already intimidating enough. Problem with this attitude is that single women usually go out with friends AND single women are much less likely to have their guard up when they have the supportive protection of those friends, so you're missing out big time if you can't make yourself part of a group.
The tricky part is that you don't want to be viewed by them as just another friend (or dare I say, "one of the girls"? ) The way to do that is to lead the group. This isn't nearly as difficult as it is to lead a group of guys, for that you need to be THE alpha. But a group of girls will follow the lead of pretty much any guy who's willing to step into the role.
How do you lead a group of girls? By being the social connection between them. You can do this by uniting the group in laughter with your sense of humor. Or you can be the common ground by starting with one or two girls and introducing them to other girls. You can also be the one who suggests fun activities for the group to do.
Why would you want to be the man amongst girls? Because they all respect the alpha of their group and never view him as 'just a friend'. If anything they tend to compete for your attention. And when you're clearly the leader of a group it shows you have an unusual set of social skills and pre-approves you with other girls.
All in all it's a good thing. Just make sure you don't start acting like them and become identified as the gay friend. Be a man, only be a man who's comfortable surrounded by estrogen
Most of the 10 you mention are things men should have figured out in their teenage years. The last one though, this is challenging, something I have worked at for a very long time.
Making guy friends, being popular and funny in a crowd of guys (even total strangers), is something that I've always been at ease with. Put me alone in a group of 5 or 6 cute single girls, though, and unless I'm in a great mood, I turn into a wallflower. It doesn't help that I'm easily bored by their topics, and I'm usually afraid of saying something that a group of females would find too masculine, vulgar, misogynist, technical, or just generally uninteresting. The dynamics of these group conversations change drastically depending on the mixture of males and females.
I've tried participating in their gossip as a way of coping, blending in. This is a doomed path toward being "one of the girls", like you say. I've tried suggesting new things to do, bringing up gender-neutral topics. I have my successes and failures, but it is an interesting challenge, and a good point you've brought up.
For the record, I consider myself neither of the things in the title thread, and I don't think your original post really has much to do with the thread title.
Heres a tip. Have you considered that the kind of women you long for are not the women that you are compatable with and that you might want to try getting to know nice girls who you dont have fake it infront of or try to change them.
All the discussion about how all girls want bad boys then try to change them into nice sensitive guys. It seem like the guys are after the hot, shallow witches then want to change them into nice, humble girls.
Man was that ever accurate. Read it twice.
OP's tips on how to play the game are really pretty worthless. What he fails to mention is that there is a huge difference between trying to land that hot chick who knows she is hot and every guy wants, versus landing the nice girl with the sweet personality.
Women aren't stupid. They know when they are in demand, and they are gonna demand that you have a helluva lot more to offer than "good game". In the case of the hot chick with a milion options....she will raise her standard considerably and demand you be very good looking, a body builder, and rich. Right wrong or indifferent....that is what she is gonna do, and your game isn't gonna matter diddly squat.
Women aren't stupid. They know when they are in demand, and they are gonna demand that you have a helluva lot more to offer than "good game". In the case of the hot chick with a milion options....she will raise her standard considerably and demand you be very good looking, a body builder, and rich. Right wrong or indifferent....that is what she is gonna do, and your game isn't gonna matter diddly squat.
You're talking about a very tiny portion of women who are super shallow and arrogant. 99% of even the hottest women do not believe they are too good for any guy who displays the right attitude. Looks and money are totally irrelevant.
That sounds like some list in a movie. It's funny. I bet you some poor sap's going to make the list and carry it to the club this weekend- and check each item off as he does it. LOL
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) The way to do that is to lead the group. This isn't nearly as difficult as it is to lead a group of guys, for that you need to be THE alpha. But a group of girls will follow the lead of pretty much any guy who's willing to step into the role.
