Older white men and young asian women (dating, girlfriend, married)
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I've dated many Korean and Chinese women, and they do not just let a man walk all over them. They are not "submissive" like American women stereotype them to be. American women confuse being feminine with being submissive it seems. American women have a lot of radical feminist ideals which are indeed radical, but to them are just normal.
Women and men from each and every Asian country are different. But in the US, we ignorantly tend to lump them all together as "Asian" and project ridiculous and untrue sterotypes ont them. Korean, Chinese, Japanese, Philipino, Thai, Vietnamese women are each VERY different. And when you really go to Asia, it is TOTALLY different than the stereotypes.
I saw the same thing with American women in Asia. They wondered why men weren't attracted to them and got angry and jealous about it. Well the answers are quite obvious to the casual observer. American women are very masculine, and their personalities are often totally uncompromising and hard to deal with.
Most of the Asian men weren't even really into the Western women. They would sometimes want to have sex with them just out of curiousity and doing something exotic, but rarely had a relationship with them.
You saying that Marilyn Monroe was masculine ? Wait, let me do some bench presses, and get the game scores, I'll be right back.
One of my closest friend is Filipina and the last thing I would call her is submissive. She is now divorced from her (poor) white husband and living with another guy that is her own race. But I can tell you this, I heard the word "babaloo" out of her mouth so many times in 11 years, I wish I knew what the he** it meant. Whatever is means, I'm sure it isn't good.
One of my closest friend is Filipina and the last thing I would call her is submissive. She is now divorced from her (poor) white husband and living with another guy that is her own race. But I can tell you this, I heard the word "babaloo" out of her mouth so many times in 11 years, I wish I knew what the he** it meant. Whatever is means, I'm sure it isn't good.
Yes, the divorce industry is "berry berry guuud" to a certain gender.
MOST and I DO MEAN MOST Asian females in my geographic area marry money and are demanding under their so-called innocent exterior. I call it "Amerikanization" and "feminization" poisoning.
Assertive women get called bad names. Assertive men are called "go getters."
No, only women who try to be like men. And you know what we call overly assertive, overbearing men? It starts with an "A" and ends with a "hole." \
Assertive women are great as long as they know what tone to strike in a given situation (same for assertive men).
I would also advise you of this: often times, the arguments between men in business can get rather rugged (because we tend to be dominance directed). I've almost seen fights occur. So if you don't have the courage to deal with that kind of intense environment you need to look for a different line of work. Resorting to complaints and lawsuits in a rambunctious workplace (it's a hostile workplace") only make things worse for women and it makes your male coworkers want to avoid you or tip toe around you.
Of course, if there are direct threats made, then you have to address it appropriately to ameliorate the problem. But you also don't want to get into a situation where you apprehend somebody just blowing off steam with as being an opportunity for litigation because you are just a sensitive person.
The propaganda in the media is that women are better at negotiating between people than men (and I suspect there is a great deal of truth due to the nature of how women bond with each other). So then given that, where does that sense of diplomacy go when you are in an office environment?
On the other hand, if you are a female boss and somebody needs a good dressing down, go for it. I don't want to create a double standard here. Do what you need to as long as your rant is well thought out and not just emotional screeching. If the guy can't take it well, there is a word for men like him, but the moderator will only allow me to say, "here kitty kitty."
One of my closest friend is Filipina and the last thing I would call her is submissive. She is now divorced from her (poor) white husband and living with another guy that is her own race. But I can tell you this, I heard the word "babaloo" out of her mouth so many times in 11 years, I wish I knew what the he** it meant. Whatever is means, I'm sure it isn't good.
Are you serious? Babalu? He's an old filipino actor famous for his chin, kinda like Jay Leno's but worse. He's not exactly the hottest looking guy out there.
Are you serious? Babalu? He's an old filipino actor famous for his chin, kinda like Jay Leno's but worse. He's not exactly the hottest looking guy out there.
She said Babalu huh? ROFL....that's classic.
You know, I thought it should be spelled with a "u", lol..
I think then she must've been calling him an idiot more or less. He is a pretty big moron to say the least. He's friendly enough, but definitely not the brightest bulb in the box...and she obviously didn't marry him for money. Too bad.
American men want to have their cake and eat it, too!
The Amercan men of today don't live up to the standards of men of the older generations.
But American men want American women to go out and make money; pay 1/2 the mortgage and other bills; look pretty; stay skinny; give porno quality lovin in the bedroom; pick up the kids and take them to soccer/ballet practice; cook like Wolfgang Puck; keep the house spotless; and keep our mouths shut.
These same men will leave the woman who does ALL of these things simply because she has reached her expiration date of being 48 years old and trade her in for the 22 year old secretary at the office.
Then they don't want to pay alimony to the woman who stopped her own career to put him through med/law/business school; bore and raised his children; managed the houshold; gave dinner parties to help him get promoted or land that big account or score that big investor.
Then American men have the audacity to call us "too independent" if we pay our own bills. Or, if not, we are "gold diggers" because we aren't independent enough. Or, if we just happen to make more money, they call us "materialistic".
American aren't jealous of Asian women we're just really disappointed in American men.
Quote:
Originally Posted by RobE
Asian women aren't the same and the mistake that jealous American women often make is to lump them all in to a common racist stereotype. I remember one particular post on the Dead Fukuzawa Society mail list from an American female expat in Japan who was lamenting that she couldn't get men interested in her because she was competing with what she termed "doll women" and then went on to say that "I have more boob acreage than all the Japanese women combined."
But you see the problem. This was a very bright, accomplished woman, but instead of seeing herself as the problem, the fault, she projected, was that all American men want tiny deferential Suzy Wong types. Not attractive to go racist just because you can't get laid.
I've dated and lived with Japanese women and believe me, they are not only NOT submissive, but they also expect you to deliver on your side of the bargain in the relationship (bring home the bacon!). They will tell you exactly what they think if they are angry with you. And half the marriages between Japanese women and foreign males end in divorce. So it's not exactly like Japanese women are desperate to get with and remain with foreign men.
There are also all kinds of cultural assumptions to reconcile and so a relationship between a foreign man and a Japanese woman is like any other, it takes a lot of work and communication.
As for American women generally, they often seem conflicted about what it means to be a woman. They fret endlessly about their identity and whether they are living up to feminist expectations. That kind of overthinking drives her and her mate crazy. Japanese women, on the other hand, revel in their femininity and know exactly who they are.
The other thing is that American women are more duplicitous. They will spout the feminist line when it is convenient for them to do so and then revert to using being a girl as an excuse when they suddenly change their minds because, "well, you know, we ARE all fickle."
And then these supposedly independent, hard charging educated women are willing to resort to alimony, a vestige of an age when women weren't allowed to work in high powered professional jobs, and take a man to the cleaners even though they are more than capable of supporting themselves. For example, there was ZERO criticism by feminists of Heather Mills when she got her hands on tens of millions of Paul McCartney's cash and they have continued to look the other way on the entire gold digging issue.
By the way, my attitude toward males such as Kevin Federlein and Larry Fortensky when they got alimony from Britney Spears and Liz Taylor respectively was, "hey you loafers, get a job!" But then again, what's good for the goose is good for the gander.
However, I will say this for American women: they are more upfront than Japanese women (who often speak vaguely because that is part of the aesthetic of being a Japanese woman), are more adventurous and have better senses of humor. Unfortunately, they are also a lot more sexually conflicted and feel they have a right to lure men into marriage with wild sex and then cut him off completely or reduce the frequency once she legally has her hands on half of his bank account.
Now that's not to say American guys don't have a lot to answer for. Too many of us are gross, ignorant, beer bellied, boorish slobs.
But just take this for what it is, how some men see American women vs. how they view foreign women.
American men want to have their cake and eat it, too!
The Amercan men of today don't live up to the standards of men of the older generations.
But American men want American women to go out and make money; pay 1/2 the mortgage and other bills; look pretty; stay skinny; give porno quality lovin in the bedroom; pick up the kids and take them to soccer/ballet practice; cook like Wolfgang Puck; keep the house spotless; and keep our mouths shut.
These same men will leave the woman who does ALL of these things simply because she has reached her expiration date of being 48 years old and trade her in for the 22 year old secretary at the office.
Then they don't want to pay alimony to the woman who stopped her own career to put him through med/law/business school; bore and raised his children; managed the houshold; gave dinner parties to help him get promoted or land that big account or score that big investor.
Then American men have the audacity to call us "too independent" if we pay our own bills. Or, if not, we are "gold diggers" because we aren't independent enough. Or, if we just happen to make more money, they call us "materialistic".
American aren't jealous of Asian women we're just really disappointed in American men.
Let me respond, and this IS NOT personal.
"Very hypocritical.
American men want to have their cake and eat it, too!
The Amercan men of today don't live up to the standards of men of the older generations.
But American men want American women to go out and make money; pay 1/2 the mortgage and other bills; look pretty; stay skinny; give porno quality lovin in the bedroom; pick up the kids and take them to soccer/ballet practice; cook like Wolfgang Puck; keep the house spotless; and keep our mouths shut."
feminism took care of that of which the women (who started this) decided they want equality and be like Men which includes going to work outside the home and becoming a empowered career woman amongst other things. So hence the prices of certain things were changed to reflect TWO incomes.
So, don't blame this on Men or get upset by this post as I have nothing to do with this.
"These same men will leave the woman who does ALL of these things simply because she has reached her expiration date of being 48 years old and trade her in for the 22 year old secretary at the office."
This goes for both genders except a good amount of females gets a $$ and asset reward from the judge even if she's childless and working in the RIGHT OR WRONG and if applicable Child...oooops I mean Mommy support and there's a reason why I call it this.
"Then they don't want to pay alimony to the woman who stopped her own career to put him through med/law/business school; bore and raised his children; managed the houshold; gave dinner parties to help him get promoted or land that big account or score that big investor."
If he was in the wrong to destroy the marriage then he should shut up otherwise too many cases the female makes out financially from these cases if she's either in the RIGHT OR WRONG it really makes no difference while that man can lose most of his hard work for a potential ex-wife that was in the wrong. Why is that in 70 - 75% of the divorces the female is the one that files first?
"Then American men have the audacity to call us "too independent" if we pay our own bills. Or, if not, we are "gold diggers" because we aren't independent enough. Or, if we just happen to make more money, they call us "materialistic"."
This is more complex to say because it's the independent opinion of each man and the attitude and expectations of each female.
"American aren't jealous of Asian women we're just really disappointed in American men."
Now that is one heck of a stretch IMO. American females are not greatly regarded by Men outside of North America because they hear about all of the so-called "hoopla". Perhaps you got burned hence why you're disappointed as I don't know your past experiences.
Last edited by njguy; 09-02-2009 at 09:33 PM..
Reason: Corrected a sentence
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Things have changed a bit.
