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This is exactly why I am undateable. Men like to be the providers, breadwinners...and often don't like it if the woman does better than they do.
This is incorrect. Many are just fine with it. In every relationship that I have had, save one, I earned a higher income and had greater assets. You make far too many assumptions about this.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jdawg8181
If I already have everything I need, in my eyes, why would a man waste his time on me?
It's not about what you need, it's not about what a person requires to survive and support yourself. If you really think that, then I think you have a warped sense of what a relationship is.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jdawg8181
I would do nothing for his ego- you are absolutely right.
If that is true, then you surely need to look within and find that ability to do so. A relationship will wither and die without that...for men and women alike.
Last edited by ChessieMom; 01-07-2010 at 01:31 PM..
This is exactly why I am undateable. Men like to be the providers, breadwinners...and often don't like it if the woman does better than they do. If I already have everything I need, in my eyes, why would a man waste his time on me? I would do nothing for his ego- you are absolutely right.
Oh, please. You are not "undateable", at least based on the fact that you earn a decent living. There are many women who have better real estate and careers than you for certain, who are dating or married.
I hate that word "undateable" and have heard women use it when they thought they were too fat or too this or that and it's simply ridiculous.
This is exactly why I am undateable. Men like to be the providers, breadwinners...and often don't like it if the woman does better than they do. If I already have everything I need, in my eyes, why would a man waste his time on me? I would do nothing for his ego- you are absolutely right.
You see that sentence right there.....speaks volumes (and I'm not a man). Do you make the men you are with feel needed or like they have anything to contribute to a relationship? Take the money and possessions out of it for a moment. After all, you are not going to offer him a bail out or asking him to come live with you so does it matter that you own your own home when you first meet someone?
Widen your social circles because it sounds like you are looking in the wrong places. If you are running into men that are intimidated by what you have accomplished, my guess is you are looking in places where the men hanging out are not ready for that type of commitment...ie..bar, club, etc.
This is exactly why I am undateable. Men like to be the providers, breadwinners...and often don't like it if the woman does better than they do. If I already have everything I need, in my eyes, why would a man waste his time on me? I would do nothing for his ego- you are absolutely right.
if there's any reason you might be undatable, it may be because you were just given a dozen or so pages of good answers, and you ignore them, only to latch onto the one theme that allows you to blame others (i.e. male egos are the problem), rather than considering that maybe your attitude or approach needs to change.
Dang, I know exactly how the OP feels. I'm 24, successful, own my home, etc., and I can't get a decent guy no matter how hard I try.
Yes, guys DO like the "bitchy ditzy bimbos with no money" because they're NEEDY and make guys feel "tough" when they can take care of them. Personally, I think the success of women like us is a turn-off for a lot of guys. They won't admit it, but it's true--we're proof!
Would you date a guy who worked at McDonald's? No? Then you can't really complain.
My father is jewish, my mother is catholic...so I don't really do either to the fullest extent. I don't go to church or temple, didn't have communion or bat mitzvah. I am ok with any religion as long as his traditions don't effect my life or our relationship in a negative way and as long as he doesn't try and force me to convert or anything. I am tolerant and accepting and willing to date any religion.
As a half-Jew myself I am going to go ahead and open this can of worms. How Jewish do you act? Many men find Jewish women to be extremely arrogant and condescending. There is a reason many Jewish men marry goys.
I think "with no money" is the part that rubs people the wrong way here. One cool thing about men is that they don't worry too much about that as long as the woman isn't a gold digger. It does sound catty and a little elitist. The rest of it is understood, and I would add skanky and crazy to the list. Plenty of women do the same thing passing over nice guys for bad boys and dooochebaggs.
No, the part that rubbed me a little wrong was the whole sentence:
Do men just want to date and marry bitchy ditzy bimbos with no money?
Many women on this forum are married, and many more used to be married. Are we bitchy, ditzy bimbos? I know I'm not ... the "no money" part, eh, kinda. And what does that say about the married men on this forum? Their wives are bitchy, ditzy bimbos?
As a half-Jew myself I am going to go ahead and open this can of worms. How Jewish do you act? Many men find Jewish women to be extremely arrogant and condescending. There is a reason many Jewish men marry goys.
Most are also known to only date within their religion. Some guys, upon finding this out, may back off.
As a half-Jew myself I am going to go ahead and open this can of worms. How Jewish do you act? Many men find Jewish women to be extremely arrogant and condescending. There is a reason many Jewish men marry goys.
Hi crbcrbrgv,
I remember chatting with my Jewish professor in an abnormal psychology class. He was still somewhat young and really a great guy with an easy going attitude. I was curious if he was aware of king Nebuchadnezzar of Babylon, depicted in Daniel, essentially received a curse from God that was descriptive of a lycanthrope when he went over this in the course. I was glad to have gave him this reference since he was quite secular. Somehow we wondered on the topic of marriage, and I looked at him and said "Oh you are married, now instead of all women hating you, its down to one". He looked at me as if I had said something truly insightful, and said that he believed feminism did indeed save the planet, but that Jewsih women didn't need it.
So... a woman that is able to take care of herself, has her own home, and is on financially sound ground, is unappealing. Yet, how many women-are-just-golddiggers-and-any-woman-I-marry-better-be-able-to-support-herself threads have we had on here??
Make up your minds.
Maybe it's just that *some" women that are independent have started responding to the endless golddigger crap that they see so many men post on here, on dating profiles, and elsewhere. I am certainly independent. I have owned my own home since I was 27 (and that is a LONG time! ), and I can support myself and my son, pretty well. (College will be a challenge - but we'll deal with that when the time comes.) But I'll be the first to admit that I do like having my man around to do those things that he does best, besides all the other obvious benefits of being in a relationship. I'm not an island, and I never have professed to be. I suspect a lot of other *independent* women feel the same way.
There's no gold to dig here. Even though she'd get total control of the finances, there isn't a heckuva lot of money left over once the bills are paid. I don't expect a woman to work for pay outside the home, but she shouldn't get a free ride either. There are things she can do around the house that I find a lot more valuable than any job she can have.
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And what does that say about the married men on this forum? Their wives are bitchy, ditzy bimbos?
a woman that is able to take care of herself, has her own home, and is on financially sound ground, is unappealing. 
Yet, how many women-are-just-golddiggers-and-any-woman-I-marry-better-be-able-to-support-herself threads have we had on here?? 
), and I can support myself and my son, pretty well. (College will be a challenge - but we'll deal with that when the time comes.) But I'll be the first to admit that I do like having my man around to do those things that he does best, besides all the other obvious benefits of being in a relationship. I'm not an island, and I never have professed to be. I suspect a lot of other *independent* women feel the same way.
