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I don't know whether to laugh or cry listening to this!
Yes she did the wrong thing and as someone else said I too have no pity for cheaters, but I don't think she deserved to be publicly humiliated like that. That's their personal business and should have been kept as such.
The radio hosts are total douchebags, laughing at her like that. That's just pure nastiness.
This too. How a person handles something like this is a real indication of their true colours and what they're capable of. Totally classless.
You feel sorry for her and then blame the men because they held her accountable for her cheating?
You feel sorry for her and then blame the men because they held her accountable for her cheating?
If the roles where reversed, if the guy was the one cheating... I bet all women in this thread would just be "you go girl!!!" but now since the girl was the one cheating they just blame the guy and say he is classless an all that.
I don't know whether to laugh or cry listening to this!
Yes she did the wrong thing and as someone else said I too have no pity for cheaters, but I don't think she deserved to be publicly humiliated like that. That's their personal business and should have been kept as such.
The radio hosts are total douchebags, laughing at her like that. That's just pure nastiness.
This too. How a person handles something like this is a real indication of their true colours and what they're capable of. Totally classless.
While I would not do what this guy did as this is not my style, I'm not shedding any tears for his gf.
If the roles where reversed, if the guy was the one cheating... I bet all women in this thread would just be "you go girl!!!" but now since the girl was the one cheating they just blame the guy and say he is classless an all that.
If the roles were reversed and if the guy was the one cheating ... I bet Nutz wouldn't be applauding his public humiliation or expound on the necessity to hold him accountable for his behavior. Do you? Don't tell me men aren't into double standards.
For what it's worth, I stick by everything I said about pillorying people for intimate transgressions. If the roles were reversed, it wouldn't change anything, as far as I'm concerned. The guy who got held "accountable" for his cheating in this manner would not have learned any lesson, other than that he dodged a huge bullet, and the girl would have looked like a fool.
If the roles were reversed and if the guy was the one cheating ... I bet Nutz wouldn't be applauding his public humiliation or expound on the necessity to hold him accountable for his behavior. Do you? Don't tell me men aren't into double standards.
For what it's worth, I stick by everything I said about pillorying people for intimate transgressions. If the roles were reversed, it wouldn't change anything, as far as I'm concerned. The guy who got held "accountable" for his cheating in this manner would not have learned any lesson, other than that he dodged a huge bullet, and the girl would have looked like a fool.
Redisca, this is what you wrote on Feb 25, and I thought it was one of the finest posts I've ever seen here. Here's an excerpt.
First, the issue of whether the guy's response was proportional to the harm suffered. Back in my days of flirting with religion, I once heard a sermon by a rabbi on the prohibition against "the evil tongue", which, as anyone familiar with Judaism can attest, is quite extensive and strict in the Jewish tradition . . . . . . The part of the sermon that stuck with me was his statement that in the Jewish tradition, the Sixth Commandment ("thou shall not murder") covers public humiliation. That's right -- when you publicly humiliate someone, for any reason, you are killing that person. The idea is (he explained), that pillorying so crushes a person's soul, that for all spiritual purposes, that person is dead, or very close to it. She cheated on him, and that's bad; he responded by killing her, and that's worse.
Redisca, this is what you wrote on Feb 25, and I thought it was one of the finest posts I've ever seen here. Here's an excerpt.
First, the issue of whether the guy's response was proportional to the harm suffered. Back in my days of flirting with religion, I once heard a sermon by a rabbi on the prohibition against "the evil tongue", which, as anyone familiar with Judaism can attest, is quite extensive and strict in the Jewish tradition . . . . . . The part of the sermon that stuck with me was his statement that in the Jewish tradition, the Sixth Commandment ("thou shall not murder") covers public humiliation. That's right -- when you publicly humiliate someone, for any reason, you are killing that person. The idea is (he explained), that pillorying so crushes a person's soul, that for all spiritual purposes, that person is dead, or very close to it. She cheated on him, and that's bad; he responded by killing her, and that's worse.
The main reason being, that a person who is hurt in this manner is not likely to ever acknowledge she did anything wrong. I believe public humiliation tends to shut down introspection.
The main reason being, that a person who is hurt in this manner is not likely to ever acknowledge she did anything wrong. I believe public humiliation tends to shut down introspection.
Not to mention create a fierce desire for revenge.
EDIT... in my ancestral language, there is an expression which is not properly translatable into English, but an approximate conversion is "to kill one's spirit." Neutrally, it simply refers to humiliating or to embarrassing another at a serious level. If used with a confrontational vocal tone, such as "are you trying to kill my spirit," it's a blunt way of saying, "are you trying to humiliate me?"
I still remember Redisca's post from that day and I may have even PM'ed her about this cultural phrase.
I then thought back of times I saw older-generation men from my ethnic community, including my own father, dressing down their sons in public for misbehavior. It happened to me as well. Even in times I deserved to be disciplined, the public rebukes were extremely humiliating. I think this is what Redisca is alluding to.
You feel sorry for her and then blame the men because they held her accountable for her cheating?
No, I never said that. If you had taken the time to read my post you would have seen I said I have NO pity for cheaters.
I think the radio hosts laughing at her obvious pain was horrible though. YES she was the one in the wrong, but she was being dumped and her whole world was falling apart - publicly - and they were in fits of laughter saying things like "****** be trippin'!". It's so unnecessary. They don't know these people and it was clearly a very delicate situation. I hate nastiness like that.
Again with the double standards - if this were a guy being dumped live on air, would they be laughing at him the same?
No, I never said that. If you had taken the time to read my post you would have seen I said I have NO pity for cheaters.
I think the radio hosts laughing at her obvious pain was horrible though. YES she was the one in the wrong, but she was being dumped and her whole world was falling apart - publicly - and they were in fits of laughter saying things like "****** be trippin'!". It's so unnecessary. They don't know these people and it was clearly a very delicate situation. I hate nastiness like that.
Again with the double standards - if this were a guy being dumped live on air, would they be laughing at him the same?
"Her obvious pain"? My dear, that's just crocodile tears. The only pain she felt was the embarrassment of getting caught, not that she was called out for it on public radio. The manner in which he busted her didn't matter, she'd have likely responded in excatly the same fashion, not to mention the fact she'd likely DENY DENY DENY, even when faced with obvious facts she did cheat. Happens all the time. In this case though he had the hosts backing him, so it was an added measure of her not being able to weasel out of it.
Everyone here on this thread, more than likely, has responded in a way fashioned by their personal experience, gender, age, relationship status, ethnicity, religion, etc. You aren't going to find any unanimity as to whether the guy's public outing of his girlfriend's cheating on live radio was "true justice" or "cruel overkill". Been there. Being in our early 40's, Diana and I weren't kids. She was food & beverage manager for a Chinese restaurant & lounge. After living together for 6 years, we apparently "grew out" of each other, with her spending as much time on the receiving end of the bar as on the delivery side. We talked about the problem with no productive results. One night she didn't come home, arriving at the house at 5:30 the next morning. At least she was candid, telling me at our dining table that she "was with another man" that night. I reached into her purse to retrieve my .38 Smith & Wesson that I lent her for her personal protection, a present she had bought me the previous Christmas. Worry? She didn't blink an eye. We both knew our loving relationship was over long ago. That day, we both cried in different rooms and I moved out the following day. Within a week, the "new guy" moved in. That pairing lasted a year, with him dying of cancer a year later. During this period after our breakup, I kept Diana on my health insurance plan, since I didn't have a new significant other in the wings and Diana's employer didn't offer its employees health insurance. Good thing for her, as she had a heart attack after our separation that was cover by my insurance plan. When she recovered and left the "other guy", we still "played around" together, as we still felt deeply for each other. Her second heart attack 6 months later killed her. That was 10 years ago. Periodically, I still think (and even dream) about Diana. However, had this occurred in our early 20's......had there been an engagement......had we been married.....her expression when I pulled out the gun from her purse might have been different.....with justification.
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