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I politely urge you to start your own thread on the topics of your choice, instead of pushing irrelevant and off-topic opinions into this thread. This thread is focused on the issues facing childless people over 65. You have children, hold childless people in contempt, and what not - views your are entitled to hold and espouse on your own thread. Just take a moment to consider how do they belong on this thread.
Please allow the people to conduct a dialog on this topic.
Hmm...rather hot topic. I did leave my job to care for both of my parents, and would do it again in a heartbeat (no pun intended). I have no children because I never married. I'll have no one to help me out, and it is worrisome inasmuch as my finances are not in the best of shape. But I'm sure I'll manage somehow. My biggest "fear" in life is not being alone in my old age, but rather not being able to care for whatever canines I have when that time comes. With 38 years of having multiples of the most noble creatures on earth, I would not want to live without them - and I hope that time will be very short for me.
Because they raised us. I never felt a moment's resentment caregiving for my Mom. No was there any thought process of 'should I?'
Neither did I, jencam. I considered it a privilege, even though it was mighty tough at times. I have a little blog here on that time of my life (but the chronology moves from the day she died until my first post; yeah, it's backwards ).
Hope you don't find one like my neighbor's. She is literally waiting for her husband to die so she can have all his money. She doesn't even hide the fact that she wants him dead. It's disgusting. I can't believe he lives with someone in his home who wants him dead. But you do you.
This happens often if choosing a cute 25-yo Thai, which is why I filtered for 50 and Filipina. I have told her when my time comes, to hold my hand and let me go, and she weeps. Actually, I fear she will keep me alive too long.
One of mi SIL has been happily married 20 years to a Norwegian, whom she caught on the rebound from his young Thai nightmare.
Before socialism and the illusion of security by taxing “other people’s children,†the only security for one’s old age was a large family or private charity. As a result of that policy, families were large. But due to advances in medicine, agriculture, science and technology, rapidly evolving Europe had the biggest population expansion and exported its surplus population across the globe to all other continents - Asia, Australia, Africa and the Americas. (While fighting incessantly for more “living room†on the continent itself.)
What changed? Genocidal socialism was implemented!
Socialism penalizes the productive and subsidizes the non-productive, especially those who are irresponsible and incompetent. The consequences of socialism and its excessive taxation have driven up the cost for raising children (in the tax paying sector), while discouraging families from propagating, as well as destroying marriages. The net result was depopulation of the tax paying working class, while the tax taking recipient class keeps expanding (which includes government bureaucracy).
One suggestion. Save them the anguish of "the talk". Write a letter to your future self explaining to your future self the real world examples you have witnessed of people who are failing mentally or physically and the anguish they caused others by trying to live alone beyond the point when it is wise to. Then give them the letter, so they can hand it to you when the time comes. That way the message is from you and you exonerate them from guilt.
This is really ridiculous on a number of levels. For one, you're not even accounting for all the people who wanted kids but never had the opportunity. I wanted kids for most of my life and eventually gave up and embraced the childfree lifestyle because I never met anyone to marry and have kids with.
Plenty of others suffer from infertility. And adoption is pretty difficult and expensive and if you have any kind of dark past or other issues the agency doesn't view as favorable, you're not likely to get a kid.
I agree with "you reap what you sow" in general. But saying that anyone who didn't have children "didn't care enough to perpetuate the species" is just wrong. There are many good reasons to avoid children even if you would've preferred things be different. For example, mental or physical illness. Not everyone has the energy or the capabilities to be a parent. Not everyone has the personality or the mental capabilities to form "lasting bonds with others".
Such a compassionless post from what's clearly a very narrow perspective.
No what is ridiculous is your inability to grasp what the caveat of "Warning, sweeping generalizations" actually means and then go into some tirade based on your inability to grasp the constructs of the English language.
And then you top it off with a personal insult of:
Quote:
Such a compassionless post from what's clearly a very narrow perspective.
which simply reinforces your lack of comprehension.
I politely urge you to start your own thread on the topics of your choice, instead of pushing irrelevant and off-topic opinions into this thread. This thread is focused on the issues facing childless people over 65. You have children, hold childless people in contempt, and what not - views your are entitled to hold and espouse on your own thread. Just take a moment to consider how do they belong on this thread.
Please allow the people to conduct a dialog on this topic.
I will leave the thread, but I will mention you read a lot into what is written.
Point one, I don't hold people who do not have children in contempt, that is a choice they generally make. I support freedom of choice. I just don't think they deserve any special consideration, if consideration at all from a society in general. Same view I hold for all classifications of people without regard to race, creed, color, disability, gender pronoun etc.
My views, I believe they belonged in this thread as you seemed to be approaching this from the perspective that we in the U.S. should also dedicate resources to assist childless people over 65, something I obviously disagree with and impacts me.
But with that I'll leave you to wallow in the singularity of your thoughts.
The unfunded liabilities of the UK through 2040 are 75% of its GDP.
The UK will have no choice but to increase taxes, while simultaneously eliminating benefits and services, and reducing other benefits and services.
A "special care" system is just another expense that the UK cannot afford.
France has slashed their pension from 50% to 37.5%, raised the retirement age, and now forces people to work 6 years longer than Americans to qualify for their pensions (7 years if born 1973 or later), and still they're at 85% of GDP.
More cuts are coming. I suspect France will reduce pensions further from 37.5% to 32.5% or 32.0%.
Britain and France are two of the best-situated. Other Euro-States are not so lucky, and those people are going to be very, very angry for a very, very long time (right up to the day they die).
True, but even the best plans get laid waste.
Well, we don't actually know that. People sometimes have distorted perceptions of reality.
She might truly think and believe she can deal with it, but when that day actually comes, she might cut and run.
Not everyone is meant to be a care-giver. It's not a weakness or character flaw, it's just how it is.
You're right - we don't actually know that because we aren't the respondent or his new wife. Each of us can only assume - but people always tend to assume the worst. Distorted perception or not - the woman is an adult - 50 yrs old and can make her own decisions. If she can't hack it - she can't hack it - just as many of us may not be able to hack it.
I love how we don't seem to discuss - but rip people up on these forums lately. People argue to argue.
I was just talking about this issue with my husband. We have adult kids but we have so many friends who do not. Even for friends who are still relatively "young" for our piers --still in their 50s-- there's this different view of the far horizon when you don't have kids.
As many have rightly stated before, having someone to "take care of you" when you're old is no reason to have kids. That would be pretty bad for the kids, for starters, and is also no guarantee the kids will be there for you when the time comes. I'm pretty sure the number of people who have kids primarily for that limited reason is vanishingly small.
Mostly this article made me more aware of the great gift the friendship of piers can be, especially to those without kids. It reminds me to, as long as I am able, make time for friends without spouses or kids and who may feel isolated as they get older, leave the workforce, etc.
This about sums up how I feel. I feel no different about those who chose to not have children than those who did.
Times are changing for those retired or approaching retirement with or without adult children.
There are lots of stories on this forum of retirees that never see their adult children or those that have been willingly burdened with becoming baby sitters for their adult children's kids.
There is no guarantee that having children will keep you from growing old alone.
A growing number of my friends are having conversations now with their siblings about their parents who want to age in place. So many of these friends live far away from their parents and if something was to happen someone will have to sacrifice their job as one of my friends wife did to move in with the parents (cross country) who both fought and lost the battle to cancer in their last year. In today's society people are moving for jobs and distances between family members continue to grow.
Some retirees have great family units and will be supported by them until the end but there are those with family that are planning for the possibility of aging in place alone.
Best thing to do regardless of your situation is make friends if you can to build a strong support group around you.
As someone also noted these so called bloggers or new age reporters are finding that they can use a statistic and spin a story so easily now.
If only I was 40 years younger, I love creative writing and have one heck of an imagination but never had the level of skills to become a journalist. The who, what, where, why, and when of reporting is long gone. Just need a tag line now and an imagination and spellcheck!
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I considered it a privilege, even though it was mighty tough at times. I have a little blog here on that time of my life (but the chronology moves from the day she died until my first post; yeah, it's backwards 
).
