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You can't fathom that a man might be interested in a woman's workout routine? And even if he's NOT, that the question isn't inherently a rude one?
I can make a moral judgment if someone's entering into rude territory, yes. But a man ASKING me about my workout routine is not a problem for me, no matter what his intentions are. I'm not the type of person who automatically assumes the worst about anyone. I'm in charge of my own life, my responses, and my interactions. The moral values of others aren't my concern. I cannot direct how others conduct themselves, only how I respond.
Okay, I'm off to work out now! These shoulders aren't going to garner compliments by themselves!
You can't fathom that a man might be interested in a woman's workout routine? And even if he's NOT, that the question isn't inherently a rude one?
I can make a moral judgment if someone's entering into rude territory, yes. But a man ASKING me about my workout routine is not a problem for me, no matter what his intentions are. I'm not the type of person who automatically assumes the worst about anyone. I'm in charge of my own life, my responses, and my interactions. The moral values of others aren't my concern. I cannot direct how others conduct themselves, only how I respond.
Okay, I'm off to work out now! These shoulders aren't going to garner compliments by themselves!
I have worked hard building up my delts, I'd be THRILLED if guys complimented me on my shoulders and asked about my routine! I see nothing wrong with asking about that.....
I don't necessarily know the full extent of what you're implying by "just a pick-up ploy," but lots of single women don't mind being paid an honest compliment that might lead to something more.
I can make a moral judgment if someone's entering into rude territory, yes. But a man ASKING me about my workout routine is not a problem for me, no matter what his intentions are. I'm not the type of person who automatically assumes the worst about anyone. I'm in charge of my own life, my responses, and my interactions. The moral values of others aren't my concern. I cannot direct how others conduct themselves, only how I respond.
The bold is a tad disturbing.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ralph_Kirk
I don't necessarily know the full extent of what you're implying by "just a pick-up ploy," but lots of single women don't mind being paid an honest compliment that might lead to something more.
It's sweet that y'all think that, but the truth is you really need to dig a little deeper. Your reactions are knee-jerk and a little naive.
Conventional wisdom: it is completely inappropriate to comment on the appearance of a stranger of the opposite sex.
Of course, most people want to be thought of as attractive. And most people like genuine, respectful compliments that are not sexually objectifying. But it's highly presumptuous of any person to think that a stranger even cares what you think of his/her shoulders or any other body part, and to pretend that it's just "an innocent compliment" when you really are trying to get somewhere is insulting.
Besides, the whole "something more" comment just proves my point.
It's sweet that y'all think that, but the truth is you really need to dig a little deeper. Your reactions are knee-jerk and a little naive.
Conventional wisdom: it is completely inappropriate to comment on the appearance of a stranger of the opposite sex.
Of course, most people want to be thought of as attractive. And most people like genuine, respectful compliments that are not sexually objectifying. But it's highly presumptuous of any person to think that a stranger even cares what you think of his/her shoulders or any other body part, and to pretend that it's just "an innocent compliment" when you really are trying to get somewhere is insulting.
Besides, the whole "something more" comment just proves my point.
I think you must be writing from a different planet than earth.
"Oh, what a nice little dog you've got there!" Maybe it's just a fellow dog-lover who wants to find out more about that particular dog. Maybe it's also an opening comment, hoping to start a conversation with a fellow dog lover that will lead to friendship or a relationship. Men do it all the time and women accept it all the time.
A guy who notices that a woman has nicely sculpted delts probably has a bodybuilding interest to some extent. Deltoids are very hard for a woman to work, and she likely will be flattered that someone has noticed. There's nothing immoral going on even if the man has hopes that it might lead to more than a fleeting smile.
I think you must be writing from a different planet than earth.
Ah, yes, the old, "I don't understand, so I will just insult you ..." approach.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ralph_Kirk
"Oh, what a nice little dog you've got there!" Maybe it's just a fellow dog-lover who wants to find out more about that particular dog. Maybe it's also an opening comment, hoping to start a conversation with a fellow dog lover that will lead to friendship or a relationship. Men do it all the time and women accept it all the time.
A guy who notices that a woman has nicely sculpted delts probably has a bodybuilding interest to some extent. Deltoids are very hard for a woman to work, and she likely will be flattered that someone has noticed. There's nothing immoral going on even if the man has hopes that it might lead to more than a fleeting smile.
This is not even close to the same thing. You realize we are talking about a very specific issue with complimenting a stranger's BODY PARTS, not his/her possessions.
It is TOTALLY DIFFERENT.
Get it now??????????????????????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????
The reason it's NOT disturbing, Wmsn4Life, is because HIS intentions have no bearing on my life. Like I said, I can't control what others do, only myself. So someone can have immoral intentions, but it won't affect me because I don't have to stick around and interact. Someone complimenting my shoulders doesn't mean I'm required to enter into a sexual liaison or even a casual conversation with them. It doesn't mean that I even have to acknowledge the compliment, if I don't feel like it. But the comment itself is not offensive to me.
I appreciate the critique , but being old my grammers already passed on long ago.
I understand. And I appreciate your insight as well. And to the (hidden) person who perceived my suggestion as an insult, a thicker skin might help your discernment.
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I see nothing wrong with asking about that.....
