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Are bullies the new child molesters? The new monster around the corner flavor of the month? I hear about bullying all the time and honestly you know who cares? Kids are mean, is that really news to anyone?
I was reading this article about this mother who choked a 13 year old boy because he was bullying her daughter - that's right, choked him - and everyone commented that she did the right thing!!! Isn't that the reason bullying is a problem anyways - the fact that we glorify violence?
I was bullied quite a bit, and I admit there were a couple times I was mean to other kids as well, I'm not perfect. People make mistakes and children are malleable. I don't think the solution is to condone vigilantism, or throw child bullies into the prison system. I do agree that a victim who fights back shouldn't be punished, unless it's really disproportionate to the original offense, yeah. Call me a wussy pacifist but I think there needs to be more compassion and forgiveness myself.
Are bullies the new child molesters? The new monster around the corner flavor of the month? I hear about bullying all the time and honestly you know who cares? Kids are mean, is that really news to anyone?
I was reading this article about this mother who choked a 13 year old boy because he was bullying her daughter - that's right, choked him - and everyone commented that she did the right thing!!! Isn't that the reason bullying is a problem anyways - the fact that we glorify violence?
I was bullied quite a bit, and I admit there were a couple times I was mean to other kids as well, I'm not perfect. People make mistakes and children are malleable. I don't think the solution is to condone vigilantism, or throw child bullies into the prison system. I do agree that a victim who fights back shouldn't be punished, unless it's really disproportionate to the original offense, yeah. Call me a wussy pacifist but I think there needs to be more compassion and forgiveness myself.
I was never mean as a kid. Neither was my twin brother, although when he entered high school and started working out he ended up using his muscle on bullies in his path to protect other younger kids. He set a precedent at his school. Plenty of kids are not mean and this likely comes down to physiology. With that said, I don't think a parent should be choking a kid. I can understand the urge to be violent against anyone that hurts our own children, but it's not a productive way to handle the situation. If the bullying were bad and my kid fighting back wasn't a viable option, I would contact the parents for help with the situation.
Bullying is cruel and represents how low families can go (kids don't end up bullies on their own-it's their parents).
In my experience, in the later 80s early 90s, it was just the bigger kids who did the bullying. It did not matter what their family life was. This was the traditional bully.
Then there was the bullies who would mess with you mentally, or get you in trouble for things they did.
Bullying is multifaceted.
I was bullied and I never even thought about killing myself nor did I dream of shooting up the schools.
These kids today are pretty ****ed up. Complaining about bullying is masking the real problem, mentally unstable kids.
In my experience, in the later 80s early 90s, it was just the bigger kids who did the bullying. It did not matter what their family life was. This was the traditional bully.
Then there was the bullies who would mess with you mentally, or get you in trouble for things they did.
Bullying is multifaceted.
I was bullied and I never even thought about killing myself nor did I dream of shooting up the schools.
These kids today are pretty ****ed up. Complaining about bullying is masking the real problem, mentally unstable kids.
No, today bullying is very different. With the Internet and social media it's taken to a new level of terrorizing and stalking. It's not comparable to the 80s.
eta: As an example, look at how people on this forum treat each other. A forum full of adults and it's like the lord of the flies. I can only imagine the levels kids take it to if adults act like they do online.
Bullying was probably worse in the 80s/90s than it is now. Despite all the stories about suicides you hear. Suicide is a complex thing too - it's not like the bullies murdered them by proxy. They may have tipped them a bit over the edge, but I don't think a kid who is mentally normal would commit suicide over bullying.
What it is, is the term du jour that's being overused.
There have always been bullies, often in the schoolyard. That's also where a lot of bullies were put in there place (there's a lot to be said for peer pressure) before hand-wringing women started following them around.
I feel like it's an extension of the "tough on crime" attitude that's built the prison industrial complex in this country. A lust for punishment that borders upon a witch hunt.
Children should not get a free pass to do mean, hurtful, and dangerous things just because they are children. It's that very attitude that has created so many sociopaths in our society. If kids aren't taught right from wrong when they're young, chances are they aren't going to learn it as adults. Now I'm not saying we should discipline every boy who pulls on a girl's pigtails, but we should take severe physical and emotional bullying seriously.
Last edited by Astorian31; 01-19-2014 at 06:26 PM..
Kids today lack coping skills. I grew up in the 90's and remember what happened to bullies that pushed too hard. After school, the kid that was being bullied would catch his oppressor alone and lay him out with a rabbit punch to the skull. I honestly think kids vacillate between taking too much abuse and shooting up the whole school.
Our zero tolerance approach to fighting and lack of attention from administrators makes kids feel helpless and trapped. Maybe I'm a violent person, but I'd probably beat the **** out of someone if they habitually crossed the line during my school days.
I am teaching my kids at a young age to push back against any kind of bullying. A bully is a weak person, not a leader. Leaders need to assert themselves early in life. If every nice kid in a class stood up to the bullying minority we would see a change in bullying behavior. I teach my daughter to defend herself because I do not believe parents are told of bullying situations by the schools until it is too late. Some administrators are enablers who believe children are incapable of being mean. An administrator told this to me a few years back. What a naive position.
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Isn't that the reason bullying is a problem anyways - the fact that we glorify violence?
