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Location: Monterey Bay, California -- watching the sea lions, whales and otters! :D
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Marilyn220 "you don't "act" or "talk" like a black person. You're different." Because I have an excellent command of the English language with no distinct dialect people cannot assume my full ethnicity over the phone or in person. Their problem not mine.
You and I are ALWAYS going to have to prove (in America atleast) that we are not like the undereducated and grammatically incorrect speaking brothas and sistas portrayed on TV and music videos. Many of us do want to become doctors, engineers, architects, lawyers, etc. We're not all trying to be athletes and entertainers.
I'm white and I agree with you. I think things are slowly changing -- you're evidence of that. As more and more black folk become educated, and gain higher career positions, it helps.
I remember taking Linguistics in college and one of the linguistic "languages" was "Black English." I was shocked. I couldn't believe they were having us study that.
I know very educated blacks, and I know those who are also "afraid" of the ghetto blacks, just like anyone would be who is threatening. I'm not sure I really understand why the ghetto blacks and those who resist education are intentionally stopping their own growth -- it baffles me. And I have worked in inner-city schools, and I really had to work hard with these kids to convince them that the odds against them being a famous rap star, basketball player, or entertainer far outweighed them being poor for the rest of their lives without an education.
Politically I'm a middle-of-the-roader -- not totally liberal and not totally conservative -- so I'm a bit of a puzzle to many people I know -- although I think that I'm probably pretty balanced. Anyway, I do think that many of the welfare programs are detrimental, and the dumbing down of schools is awful.
Most of the blacks I know who have "made it" were raised in either white neighborhoods, or went to school in very mixed but good schools. And they also don't speak the ghetto language.
I think Bill Cosby is doing a good job at identifying the hurdles kids have to overcome, and insisting that they help themselves. It is very difficult, however, the payoffs can be great.
Obviously, I am not black, so I don't speak from that experience, and can only talk about what I have learned from those around me. Throwing money at programs to keep people in poverty is stupid, I think. Most whites I know accept their black co-workers and other professionals on an equal level....because they ARE equal! They have worked hard, got their education, and they're using it. They don't have an attitude, they are equally respectful of others, and it is not a problem.
Sometimes "tough love" is needed. Having worked with delinquent teens of all colors, it's the same theme -- learning responsibility, taking responsibility, becoming literate by being serious about school, and treating others with respect. Those who resist, fail; those who don't, will succeed. The path to success is never easy, but it can be a path that will lead to a better future.
It has been brought to my attention that the original post in this thread doesn't mention racism in Los Angeles in particular. Because many responses have addressed this in terms of their experiences in L.A., I'm not going to delete or move this thread. However, please keep this topic to racism in L.A. In the future, threads of this nature will be moved to the Political forum.
I like educated, well-spoken black people. I only have a problem with the ghetto ones who play their rap music at volume so high that even four cars away my car is shaking to the beat, the ones who call each other "n-----", the ones who deal drugs, the loud and obnoxious ones, the ones who argue and yell at 2:00 a.m. as if it's 2:00 p.m., etc. Unfortunately, these are the kind who move into my building. My son once accused me of being racist. I'm not racist; I would dislike anyone else who exhibited these behaviors - white, black, brown, it doesn't matter.
If someone is wearing certain clothing, walking a certain way, etc. then yes, I will assume things about them - probably that they are less educated, etc. That's just human nature; we judge people by appearances, closely followed by that person's behavior. I don't assume that all black people are ghetto, because they aren't. I just wish more good people would move into my building!
I know what you mean. I have no problem with most white people. Most white people are okay, but I don't really like the flag waving white people who carry guns and drive really big SUVs and complain about the Mexicans squeezing in over the border all the time. Those are the only ones I have a problem with. Other than that, white people are okay.
It has been brought to my attention that the original post in this thread doesn't mention racism in Los Angeles in particular. Because many responses have addressed this in terms of their experiences in L.A., I'm not going to delete or move this thread. However, please keep this topic to racism in L.A. In the future, threads of this nature will be moved to the Political forum.
Thank you.
Thank you Sandy. I was talking about L.A., in particular, especially since the racism is much more subtle and indirect here. What I find so dangerous about L.A. is that people hide behind liberal beliefs while still propagating racism. I think L.A. is worse than the South because you don't really know who the enemy is. You just feel the knife in your back afterwards.
Yes, there ARE people who have NO problem whatsoever that you are black. I don't see you any different than myself, and I'm almost as white as you can get (except supposedly my family has native american in our lineage). It's absolutely beyond my comprehension how these kinds of treatments are still occuring in our world today--I'm getting sick of it. Myself and all the people I associate with would not think anything negative or positive based on the color of your skin. I just see people as people. Race has nothing to do with action or any certain lifestyle. I'm sick of that, too. Crime, poverty, 'laziness'...these things are done or experienced by all races equally--the only thing that is not equal is socio-economics, and any person faced with extreme poverty or hunger...homelessness...wanting a job but not being able to find one...the lure of drugs in the face of what seems to be a hopeless future, will be more capable of crimes from desperation or crimes of anger towards society. And the dynamics of socio-economics are different from state to state, country to country...it affects all people. The generalization that it's black or hispanic people contributing the most to these things is wrong publicity and derives from cycles of hate and fear...the propagation of these cycles comes when someone projects prejudice upon another, that other gets frustrated and angry and they become leary of prejudice from more of these 'someones', this causes them to be more open to prejudice of these 'someones', and what is created are actions by this 'other' that this 'someone' projected out of pure fear or ignorance. More and more of this, and these cycles of hate and fear spin out of control.
Yes, there are people (those who don't have their head stuck in the sand) who don't have a negative image of black people--me being one of them. And, hey...'Invisible', why not lift your head up and give yourself a name that is more befitting of you...You're not invisible...No one here wants you to be (unless, again, they have their head stuck in 'said sand').
All the best...sorry these social things still exist today and that you've been affected by them. It's high time we all grow up and begin to be the people we want to be and ought to be...not the people that U.S. history depicts, and not the people that current ignorance depicts.
And, to our moderator, just so you know I'm here talking about these things because I'm trying to learn about L.A. I will be moving to L.A. in a few weeks, and am trying to get a feel for how to be safe from crime there, and trying to understand why there is more racial tension in these large cities with more diversity and exposure than small cities with less exposure. Here in Boise we don't see color of skin...I can't say all together, no, but that is my experience. Crime is not blamed on one race...people do not fear one race--and last I checked most of the horrific crimes here were commited by whites. When will be get passed that at a cellular level our bodies decide how much melatonin our skin will receive. Hey, I wish mine created more so I didn't burn so fast!
Thank you, eeka
I will consider changing the invisible name. I never felt racism against me until I got older. When I was younger, I had a variety of friends from all backgrounds and I felt that racism was a state of mind. I had always believed that if you worked hard and achieved your goals, people will see you for who you are inside. It's only after I started college that I began to see things differently. I wasn't looking for it, it just came and hit me in the face. There are some things that can only be ignored for so long. I will never give up working hard, I just get a little frustrated sometimes. This is 2007 and it's almost like Civil Rights never happened. It seems that we get along great as children, then we become adults and turn stupid. How does that happen? It will be a great day when we stop passing old prejudices and fears down to our children, and let them make up their own minds about people regardless of skin color.
What you're saying, though, ought to give us hope! Children are the most honest, and if as children we don't have issue of, or think about, difference of skin color, then that perhaps is the most honest of our true selves. Perhaps it's personal fears, insecurities, media inflamation, etc, that begin to 'get to' certain people in their adult years. Children have less fear because of innocence, and if the news or personal experience hurts that innocence, then maybe some people begin to think wrongly. It's just a frustration if people are victims of crime and generalize about the 'race' of the person who commited it. Like I said, if people here did that (Boise--and that is why I'm here...to try and figure L.A. out before I get there in a few weeks!!!), they would generalize that 40 something white males were VERY dangerous. Again, all people are equally capable of being mentally ill and causing crime, or being desperate and angry and committing crime.
It's a strange world we find ourselves in today. I said in another post how I was in Dallas visiting my Brother. We went to what is called the 'Redbird Mall', but is nicknamed 'Blackbird Mall'. I thought for SURE people weren't that ignorant or hateful, and so I DID go to this mall. I was the only white person there, as far as it seemed, and I was not looked at very nicely by the black people walking by me. I went into a store to buy my Brother a bd present and was asked to leave because, "don't you know this is a black only mall!!! get out of here!!!" I almost protested, and I got really sad and felt so unheard...this retail worker wouldn't give me ANY chance. But you know something, THIS is what I'm talking about concerning propagation of fear and hate. I venture to guess that the black population in Dallas had been treated with prejudice by the whites. This would cause anyone to become angry and prejudice towards those who are hurting them. I KNEW that if I acted out and was disrespectful to this black retail worker that I'd ONLY feed his opinion of white people. I told him, "sorry, I didn't realize...didn't mean to cause problems...have a great day." Like I've said, cities like L.A. (large cities) should be more open-minded because of their experience with more people of other races...I suppose it isn't always true? And for those races who fear prejudice, it can take only one time to reinforce that fear and to become defensive. We ALL have the responsibility to act in maturity and broad-thinking when we're faced with being treated wrongly...if we treat the person/persons who're wronging us with maturity and kindness, it begins to dispell THEIR wrongful prejudice and fears.
One of my boyfriends when I was in my early 20's was black. We had a GREAT relationship until I met his family. I'm blonde, green eyed...VERY white. His family in their own way were trying to do their best. They feared for their son the repercussion of dating a white girl. We didn't listen to them for a long time, but the relationship he had with his family got worse and worse, and it began to cause us stress. I couldn't believe that in our day and age that I could be prevented from dating a person of a different race. It was sad, we really loved each other. It turned out for the best, though, since I met the person who was meant to be my husband, but the point still stands.
We just need to keep a cool head, counter rudeness due to race with kindness and patience, keep ourselves level headed and not make generalization even if the media focuses on one racial group, and then...It is inevitable these cycles will slow down and stop...if nothing is feeding them, then they have to--or in the least only be fed by a minority few who won't let go of ignorance for one reason or another.
All the best in L.A. Any advice for being safe and doing well in L.A.? I'm a small-towner who is not used to big cities...I'm afraid it will be a bit of a shock at first! : )
Invisible,
I know just what you're talking about. However I have no belief that racism will ever go away, it will just be more subtle. Please remember a few things, America used to be a melting pot. I say used to be because when people immigrated to our country they assimilated (melted) to the American culture. That doesn't happen these days. We tend to allow everyone to not assimilate to the american way. The problem with that is people who are not used to seeing black people may be afraid of them, children call blacks names, the parents encourage this by not wanting their children to play with black kids or any other minority. As stated before, hip hop videos does not help.
Also, there is racism within the black culture. Have you experienced that? I have and I'm not sure which is worse, being put down by another race or by your own. Your either too light or too dark. Your hairs to nappy or "ooh she got some good hair" and everyone wants to touch it. If you're an educated black person and you speak and carry yourself well, then you're "selling out", an "uncle Tom" or "white-washed".
Something funny....I grew up around blacks, whites and mexicans.(so cal) I was always bussed to predominately white schools. No problems. Sometimes my cousins or neighborhood kids would call me white-washed or tell me I was a white person dipped in chocolate! My DH is white and I didn't start speaking "ebonics" if you will until I met him!!! He doesn't attempt to act black or pretend to know the struggles of a black person. He's told me that he does feel more comfortable around black people though. When people talk to my husband on the phone they're always suprised to find out he's white, because he sounds black. Its not the words he uses but more of his natural tone. I sound the complete opposite.
If we could get rid of the racism within our own culture and come together then maybe we can make sure a better image is portrayed. Children in the "inner city" need to see other role models than rappers and sports stars.
I read the message boards about racism and there is a lot of hostility aimed at African Americans. Lots of races want to dress Black, talk Black, act Black, but don't want to be Black. After all this time, after all the strides we have made, why are we still saddled with negative stereotypes? I am tired of people seeing "Black, lazy, unintelligent" when they first see me. I go to school full time, work part-time, and I am raising a child. My grade point average has always been 3.0 or better. So why do I have to prove myself everywhere I go? Is there anyone out there who doesn't have a negative image of Black people? Please help. Being Black is not a crime, but it certainly feels like it.
As a native southerner I am sorry. I grew up with and around racism! At the time in the south we knew no different. Dare I tell you that my great grandfather, who was the sherriff of our county back in the 30's, actually shot and killed a black man on the courthouse steps for picking his head up as a white woman walked by. How horrible is that? Such demons to live down.
I was talking to my mother on Thursday about serial killers and how they are always white males. I said to her how interesting it was to think about that. I said you never hear of black men going around abducting little boys or girls and molesting, mutilating and killing them. The main thing you hear of is crimes against their own. My mother then said that when she was growing up they were taught to be afraid of black people. That they were booger men out to get you. I know this is horrible, but it is kind of like talking about it is therapy.
You know, think about all of the young kids over in the middle east. They are learning only what they are taught. Their heads are being filled with hatred towards us because we are not muslim. We are infidels to them and their parents. It is no different than what was done to my parents about being told that black people were bad and to stay away from them.
It is sad, I know, but hopefully things will continue to get better. Just know that for every racist out there, there are many good people to replace them. Just as I know that for every thug out there, there are many good people like you to replace them. Let's just keep striving for what is right and teach our children that love for each other is better than anything.
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My son once accused me of being racist. I'm not racist; I would dislike anyone else who exhibited these behaviors - white, black, brown, it doesn't matter.
