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I landed a job right after college that pays an ok salary for my area (60k/year in metro Atlanta). The job is around 10 minutes away (w/o traffic) from my parent's house. The cost of living in the city my parents live is fairly high (the average family income is like 140k/year to give you a reference) and the city my job is located has an even higher rent. I don't want to spend most of my salary on rent. I could live in a cheaper area, but it will be a lot more in commute time.
My parents have more than enough room for me (it's a 5 bedroom house and there's also a mother in law suite - and I'm an only child).
I told a few people about my plan, and they told me it was weird and that I was acting like a spoiled brat. I don't know, I'm still going to do it, but is it really that weird? I read that a lot of people my age (21) are still dependent on their parents/will live with their parents after college.
I don't think its weird. It makes economic sense but this country has moved away from this practice.
It is common in many countries for extended families to live under one roof and it was fairly common in the US not so long ago. I remember growing up that my uncles and aunts lived at home until they married (especially aunts) and some of them lived with my grandparents briefly after marriage. I also remember older family memebers living with both sets of grandparents and my aunt moving in with my grandparents to help them when they got older.
How exactly am I suppose to pay when they don't take the money and lecture me instead?
Easy peasy. You get gas when they aren't with you. You walk to the register and say, "$25.00 on number 4 please". Then you hand the attendant $25.00 in cash and you walk back to your car and and use the pump. Then you drive to Target by yourself and get what you need and when the person at the register says, "$56.75" you hand her three twenties. Then you put the change in your purse and walk out the door with your new sheets.
You're welcome.
If they lecture you listen carefully and decide if you want to hear that when you're 50 and still under their roof.
But, while I wouldn't deny my sons a roof over their head, and I genuinely enjoy their company, I would prefer to see them out on their own.
They would rather be on their own. .
I raised my sons to be independent and responsible. They like being on their own. As I did too after I left for college. I couldn't imagine living back home again after being independent at college.
I landed a job right after college that pays an ok salary for my area (60k/year in metro Atlanta). The job is around 10 minutes away (w/o traffic) from my parent's house. The cost of living in the city my parents live is fairly high (the average family income is like 140k/year to give you a reference) and the city my job is located has an even higher rent. I don't want to spend most of my salary on rent. I could live in a cheaper area, but it will be a lot more in commute time.
My parents have more than enough room for me (it's a 5 bedroom house and there's also a mother in law suite - and I'm an only child).
I told a few people about my plan, and they told me it was weird and that I was acting like a spoiled brat. I don't know, I'm still going to do it, but is it really that weird? I read that a lot of people my age (21) are still dependent on their parents/will live with their parents after college.
Just because you can, doesn't mean you should. Your mentality alone is ridiculous.
You make $60K a year. I was making $40K in Alpharetta and was able to get a decent apartment.
Since you're going to do it anyway though, good luck finding a boyfriend. I wouldn't date any chick that was still living at home after college and a good-paying FT job, much less have a relationship with her.
I'm the only child, not the last child. Everything in the household tends to revolve around me. My parents will probably sell the house when my dad retires (according to him, he'll retire in 10 years. haha). It's a good location and the house prices are probably going to keep going up, so my parents aren't willing to sell. My parents seemed pretty happy.
I raised my sons to be independent and responsible. They like being on their own. As I did too after I left for college. I couldn't imagine living back home again after being independent at college.
OP has all that ahead of her. She wants to go to college. But she needs money for that.
Whats the alternative? Moving out now, going to college and graduating with huge debt?
I could have written this. And, I'm going to sound hypocritical, because our oldest moved back home after college and lived here through grad school. Now our middle son is back home after graduation, and just started a full-time job. But, while I wouldn't deny my sons a roof over their head, and I genuinely enjoy their company, I would prefer to see them out on their own.
They would rather be on their own. We have no rules beyond picking up after yourself, but having lived away all through college, they have a completely different life style that doesn't always mesh with that of their parents. As hard as I try not to worry, until middle son is home I'm not going to sleep well. And, he goes out every single night. I'm sure he did the same thing at college, but I could pretend he was in the library studying then.
Spread your wings and fly, and learn to live on a budget for a change OP. It will serve you well in the end, and might do your parents well to be less involved in your life, and more in their own.
This is a good, honest post.
I highlighted that sentence, not to argue with you, but to bring up something that I see a lot of.
My husband and I are in our fifties. We have five adult kids ranging from age 22 to age 32. Four of the five are completely self sufficient (yay, them and yay, us!). The youngest is still in college.
Due to our ages and the ages of our adult kids, we know a lot of parents whose adult kids have moved back home. They claim to be doing it to "save money," usually. However, they always seem to have enough money to eat out constantly, dress to the nines, drive nice vehicles, and buy the latest electronics and phones.
I have some suggestions if they really want to "save money." But I think the real issue is often that they know that if they moved out, they COULDN'T afford to maintain their current, rather pampered lifestyle.
Plus, they'd have to wash their own dishes and do their own laundry.
I'm not saying that's the case with your sons. I am saying that's the case with the people I know.
Our youngest son is my stepson. He's his dad's only child. He doesn't have a job, and doesn't pay any of his own college expenses. Basically, he refuses to work. Consequently, my husband, though he does pay a portion of his college expenses (which he'd do so anyway, because he wants to help his son through college), refuses to be a vending machine. It's like he says all the time, "Heck,I'd give him MORE money if he'd just get a job!" But my stepson's lifestyle would be cramped by a job! He'd have to take MORNING CLASSES, or get up earlier. He might have to work nights and weekends! OH THE HORROR.
I saw on his FB page the other day this cryptic quote: "I sure will be glad to get out into the real world. Six more years of college seems like such a long time..."
WHISKEY TANGO FOXTROT?
We've got news for him - he doesn't have to worry about waiting six more years to get out into the real world. He's got one more year of college on us. After that, it's root, hog or die, baby! (He won't die.)
Seriously, you compare a 21 year old kid who just reached the drinking age to a 40 year old woman?
Quote:
Originally Posted by oh-eve
OP has all that ahead of her. She wants to go to college. But she needs money for that.
Whats the alternative? Moving out now, going to college and graduating with huge debt?
The OP has been to college, which her parents paid for. She's contemplating going to grad school. She says that not only will she be living with her parents, whose world revolves around her, but that they will insist on paying for all of her personal expenses (gas, phone insurance clothing) even though she'll be making $60,000 per year.
As I said above, it's one thing for an adult child to live with parents and act like a responsible adult, but it's another thing for an adult child to live with parents and still be treated as a child. The first circumstance makes sense on a lot of levels, the second seems strange and oppressive.
OP has all that ahead of her. She wants to go to college. But she needs money for that.
Whats the alternative? Moving out now, going to college and graduating with huge debt?
According to the other thread someone referenced, or other phrases I saw as I was looking for it, her parents are paying for all of her college tuition and she thinks people shouldn't have more children than they're able to send to college.
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