Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Your own parents outing you to others ain't cool. However there must be a reason they would do so. Previous experiences or whatever that may be didn't sit well with them. Or perhaps there's nothing goin on in their own lives right now they find it necessary to discuss yours.
The less you share, the better. When outsiders ask your business, tell them that is personal, so dont ask. If they push, ask them personal intrusive questions for a taste of the nosy flavored koolaid.
Be firm with your parents, as far as packing up and looking for an apartment. Do stand up to them, you are an adult. Do not let people continue to spread your business!
Again, the less you share, the better off you are. No one is putting a gun to your head. As for your SIL, bluntly tell her to mind her business.
Status:
"It's WARY, or LEERY (weary means tired)"
(set 25 days ago)
Location: A Yankee in northeast TN
16,150 posts, read 21,310,284 times
Reputation: 43949
Quote:
Or perhaps there's nothing goin on in their own lives right now they find it necessary to discuss yours.
Kid moving back home IS something going on in their lives, a rather big something. Not like it's a quick weekend visit or something that doesn't have much impact on their day to day lives.
Kid moving back home IS something going on in their lives, a rather big something. Not like it's a quick weekend visit or something that doesn't have much impact on their day to day lives.
Yes. I don’t understand why this is “personal.” Kids move back in with parents for a reason. It is usually something big like a job loss, divorce, foreclosure, eviction, etc. Everyone knows this. There are some circumstances where kids move in to help out a parent or to split expenses in expensive areas, but that is not the norm. Heck, a lot of wealthy and connected people got jobs through their parents, so sometimes having parents who blab can help with networking. You never know who might be able to help.
How would you deal with parents who want to reveal all kinds of personal info about you to friends and family while you prefer them to keep a lid on it (and have stated your position as such)?
Lie and be vague. When folks ask why you lost your job use these lines:
#1. I was laid off because my job was transferred to india or china.
#2. There were shady business dealings and I don't want to be part of illegal activity.
#3. Paychecks were bouncing and I don't work for free.
Be creative until you can get the heck out from under your unreasonable parents.
First, don't be embarrassed about being fired (assuming you weren't fired for illegal activity). Companies are heartless about axing people, so there's no shame.
If it were me, I would probably give up on the idea of stopping my parents from telling others. What I would do instead is to tell them, politely but firmly, that if they refuse to stop, that I consider it to be a grossly inconsiderate invasion of privacy. (If they laugh, you can coldly say that you don't consider that kind of invasiveness funny.) And after they stop sputtering, I'd add that I hope they realize that from now on I will no longer be confiding in them at all, since they refuse to exercise restraint.
Remember, just because relatives ask nosy questions, you don't have to answer them. You can either politely say that you don't want to get into it, or you can use humor to deflect. The other fun alternative is that you can burst into tears and demand "Why do you keep wanting to make me feel bad?" That should make them back off (although of course then they'll gossip about your being hysterical).
Adults who are dependent on their parents to provide housing and transportation don’t get to have privacy. Move out, buy a car and you can have all the privacy you want.
That makes no sense. Cars can be maintenanced in any city.
And unless the OP was involved in a bad car accident, its usually not something that takes more than a day or two to get resolved. Not really something you would have to move in with someone because of.
OP, if you liked the city you where living in with the lady and her cat, see if you can get back into that situation. In the mean time, keep conversations light with your parents, just thank them for letting you stay with them, and assure them you will be out of their hair a soon as possible. Don't ask them for suggestions, or help with your job search.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
