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Doesn't the OP live with his parents, though? If he turns down this trip and then doesn't go on another trip on his own, they'll know and it might hurt feelings.
Bottom line is that you have to balance your own needs with maintaining the level of closeness that you want with your parents. If this trip is important to them, maybe go every other year just to keep the peace. I do stuff with my mom because family is very important to her, not because I'm super jazzed about spending time with extended family.
Yeah I live with them at the moment, and live in the basement, and I do go to keep the piece, it's just I just started a new job three months ago, and not sure if it makes a good impression to take a couple of days off already. It would be four days and the other two days is the weekend.
But I am using my weekends to make short films, since I am trying to become a movie director, and trying to keep myself available for that on weekends this summer, and it's just not the best summer for me to take a vacation at this point I feel this time around.
Yeah I live with them at the moment, and live in the basement, and I do go to keep the piece, it's just I just started a new job three months ago, and not sure if it makes a good impression to take a couple of days off already. It would be four days and the other two days is the weekend.
But I am using my weekends to make short films, since I am trying to become a movie director, and trying to keep myself available for that on weekends this summer, and it's just not the best summer for me to take a vacation at this point I feel this time around.
A new job with no accrued vacation time is reason enough. Tell them you don’t want to jeopardize your job and that if they really love you they wouldn’t put you in this position. Throw the guilt back on them.
Yeah I live with them at the moment, and live in the basement, and I do go to keep the piece, it's just I just started a new job three months ago, and not sure if it makes a good impression to take a couple of days off already. It would be four days and the other two days is the weekend.
But I am using my weekends to make short films, since I am trying to become a movie director, and trying to keep myself available for that on weekends this summer, and it's just not the best summer for me to take a vacation at this point I feel this time around.
A new job is a perfect reason not to go. Any reasonable person would understand that.
Well I've been working there for four months now exactly, and they say that is enough time to get a couple of days off.
Do you accrue vacation time? How much do you have? Is sick leave part of that time? It is pretty normal to not take any time off for quite a while after starting a new job, in order to build up a bank of time off. You may be able to take a couple days, but that doesn't mean it's a good idea.
Well I've been working there for four months now exactly, and they say that is enough time to get a couple of days off.
Your parents don’t get to dictate when and how much vacation your company gives you. Only the company gets to do that. Just tell your parents you don’t have any vacation available so it’s not possible for you to go. If they’re that unreasonable then they’re going to be upset no matter what good reason you give for not going. You can’t change their reaction. You can only change how you deal with it. Good luck.
I think the main reason why they really want me to go with them is because my brother is going through some mental health problems, which I posted about before in this thread, explaining it better:
Basically they feel that if I go, my brother will go, and if I don't my bro will want to stay home and they feel they cannot leave him home alone with those issues, and I think my parents feel that if I don't want to go, then I am not being supportive of his problems.
So your parents need you to go to help with your brother? And if you don't go, no one can go?
Nah, it's just an excuse. If he wanted to go, the new job wouldn't matter.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kibbiekat
He doesn't want to go. Nothing else matters. Having a reason just softens the blow to his parents.
I don't think it's that simple. He started this thread presumably because he's feeling guilt for not wanting to go. It's really weighing on him. And that guilt isn't going away because some people on here helped him come up with some good excuses.
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