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I live in one of the 5 States that doesn't allow it. Although I've seen parents allow their teen(s) drink alcohol in their presence. Their business, not mine.
My father in law introduced my kids to coffee when they were toddlers.
I'm not a fan of smoking cigarettes or marijuana. People who do smoke are used as examples of people who make bad choices, smell bad and don't spend their money on important things. So yes, I am teaching my children to judge others and happily do so.
My husband and I both had grandfathers who were alcoholics. We both saw some things you never want loved ones to see. We don't avoid alcohol, but it just isn't a big part of our lives. Once in a while, we may slip some Baileys Irish Creme or Kahlua in our coffee. Or my husband may buy some beer if we have guests. We've never developed a taste for wine. I'm pretty much a one drink drunk. My kids see bottles of alcohol sitting around that may have been there for a few years. It's probably something I need to talk to them more about, but we do model appropriate behavior.
In our state it's legal for bars to serve a minor if they are with their parents...she went out with us early new years eve for a few...we sat at the bar and since it wasn't busy the bartenders were talking to us and answering her questions...they came up with a variation of the days drink special that ended up being very good...but more so it was a step in teaching her drinking etiquette and how to behave at a bar... not just go somewhere to get wasted. Considering she's going to of legal age in a year anyway...it's important.
Why do you have to give them any of those things? Coffee is kind of cultural, if the child shows an interest, then let them have it. As far as alcohol and "doobies", I think I would let them figure it out on their own. Just keep the lines of communication open and they will talk to you about it. Go to parties and such should be decided on according to the maturity of the child. Just make sure they know how to conduct themselves at a party. I use to tell my girls " don't take a drink from ANYONE, not even your best friend. Make a drink yourself, or open the beer yourself. And I made sure they knew why. It use to be called "street sense". I made sure all my kids had it. It is all in the communication.
I'm Canadian too although I live in the states. We will probably let our kids have a small glass of wine at family celebrations and nice dinners starting around 13.
When I went to college in the US I was amazed at how irresponsible so many of the kids were with alcohol compared to my friends in Canada who had been exposed to it for years.
Both of my kids have had coffee, one really can't drink it for health reasons and the other doesn't like it at least not yet.
Location: Scott County, Tennessee/by way of Detroit
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Quote:
Originally Posted by butterflies1375
and in many it is illegal.
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In Michigan it is illegal....around graduation time, when I worked at the court, we would get the host party tickets....parents who let the kids drink and then all hell broke loose under the tent outside and the cops were called...checking IDs..but usually if the party was not bothering the neighbors, they drove on past..
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