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Other than trying a sip or two, when is it appropriate to give your child his/her first drink? How about let them go to parties?
Because weed has been legalized in some states, what do you think is the right age to give him/her his first doobie? And what about coffee?
I wouldn't "give" anything to them at anytime, if they were old enough to think they needed alcohol or whatever it was they were old enough to have a job and buy it themselves.
No "trying a sip or two" either and coffee was out as well.
I moved to France at 14 and lived in a dormitory. All the dining halls had pitchers of red and white wine on the tables. What a culture shock that was. Wine and water were free. Soda cost extra. So I learned to like wine. And I didn't grow up to be a drunk. It wasn't nearly as interesting to me as it was to my contemporaries in the States. For me it was more like, OK, I tried it and no big deal.
Hey, my parents weren't super-strict psychos, but I just figured ON MY OWN that obeying the law was a good idea. Didn't drink until I was 21, either.
People are cynical. But, as it has been pointed out, there are many states where kids under 21 can legally drink in their parents' presence. So, if they are, it's within the law.
This exactly. The more taboo and forbidden it is, the greater the chances of overindulgence and binge drinking with friends as a form of rebellion.
I wasn't comfortable with my husband offering our boys sips of beer when they were younger, and a can of cold beer when they were 12-14 or so if they'd been working together outside on a hot day. He said not to make it taboo or forbidden because it would encourage overindulgence.
I'm sorry to say, but one of our sons is an alcoholic and the other one drinks too much IMO. His theory didn't work, but I don't think keeping it from them would have worked either.
I think if alcoholism is in their genes, it makes no difference either way.
Other than trying a sip or two, when is it appropriate to give your child his/her first drink? How about let them go to parties?
Because weed has been legalized in some states, what do you think is the right age to give him/her his first doobie? And what about coffee?
who in the world plans on giving their child a recreational drug upon any specific age?
Not addressed to you but in general^^
As for parties, it never occurred to me not to allow my son not to go to any party at any age. Depending upon the age, I might go with him. And depending upon behavior, none of us will go.
mhmmm, right. I guarantee you kids w/ parents who forbid them from seeing R movies make a point of watching R movies.
We'll see. I'm not there yet. There is a difference between forbidding and not encouraging. I don't have to rent an r rated movie and call it family movie night, nor do I have to offer a 16 year old a drink. That doesn't mean I forbid them under all circumstances.
Other than trying a sip or two, when is it appropriate to give your child his/her first drink? How about let them go to parties?
Because weed has been legalized in some states, what do you think is the right age to give him/her his first doobie? And what about coffee?
Our sons get a drop of sweet wine as part of a religious cermony on their tongues 8 days after birth. And the children are offered a sip of wine as part of a religious ceremony every Friday night. They always preferred grape juice instead, unless it was the really sweet fizzy wine. The liquor in the house is not locked up or enshrined in a liquor cabinet. And the incidence of alcoholism, or even alcohol consumption, in our ethnic group, is extremely low.
I think that when people make a big deal about alcohol, the kids think it's something special and forbidden, hence much more attractive.
As for caffeine, I have let the children have a little strong decaf with a lot of milk, if they liked the coffee flavor. But the one morning that I accidentally gave the 5 year old caffeinated coffee with a lot of milk, you could see how hyperactive it made him. Never again.
I have offered the teens, who both have unmedicated ADHD due to their own refusal to take meds, caffeinated coffee as a study aid. One refuses it, one has tried it - maybe helped a tiny bit. If they wanted a cup of coffee in the AM, I'd let them have it as high schoolers. But more importantly, I send my kids to bed early, so they get enough sleep, so that they can function in the early AM. I wouldn't use caffeine as a substitute for getting enough sleep.
So I guess my feeling is, if the kid wants a sip of your beer or wine or mixed drink at home, let him taste it. Don't make a big deal out of alcohol. At the same time, warn them that alcoholism ruins lives. And limit your own consumption to no more than a serving or two a day, so they see that YOU don't drink to excess.
I would not let my teen serve friends alcohol at our home because of the potential legal ramifications. I probably wouldn't let him serve himself a drink whenever he wanted, but as a college aged kid, if Dad is having a beer with his chips in front of the game, and college student wants one too, I'd let him.
Caffeine - I'd let them have it beginning in high school, if they want it, since high school starts so early in the AM, and their circadian rhythm as teenagers would have them sleeping very late, if they could.
If there is alcoholism in the family, I would warn the kids about it repeatedly when they are young, certainly before adolescence starts. I would encourage them to never try it, for that reason. Same as I would warn them about drugs, gambling, credit, and unwarranted student loans.
In PA I've learned legality has little to do with it...they'll find a way around it
Trust me. Not just PA. Anywhere.
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