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Many are very accommodating to those with special dietary needs.
Others are not so understanding.
I heard a story of one well-meaning mother-in-law who understood her son's wife's vegetarianism simply meant she didn't care for the taste of meat.
So one day she served a meal containing meat to see if her daughter-in-law liked it. When she disclosed it had meat in it, she couldn't figure out why her DIL ran to the bathroom to throw up.
My daughter is vegetarian and has been vegan at times. It's easy to accommodate a vegetarian; a vegan requires a bit more thought but is doable. She's good-natured about it if she goes somewhere and there aren't any vegetarian options. She's been known to eat hamburgers and hot dogs with everything but the meat.
Many are very accommodating to those with special dietary needs.
Others are not so understanding.
I heard a story of one well-meaning mother-in-law who understood her son's wife's vegetarianism simply meant she didn't care for the taste of meat.
So one day she served a meal containing meat to see if her daughter-in-law liked it. When she disclosed it had meat in it, she couldn't figure out why her DIL ran to the bathroom to throw up.
Yup this is why I do't trust other peoples cooking who don't know me well and love me for me. What a horrible woman that is.
Yes, maybe a bit different because I am vegan but I have to put with family members saying its too hard work to do vegan meals as well, despite the fact that they could just do vegan and everyone could eat that. Simple.
non-vegans don't want to eat vegan or spend hours cooking a meal they don't want to eat.
The point is meat eaters can't complain when they eat vegan food all the time. The important thing is to have a meal that EVERYONE can eat.
You not only expect a non-vegan to figure out how to prepare a vegan meal, but expect everyone else to eat it too. That's pretty selfish. I had a vegetarian guest at a holiday once. I made an extra pasta dish without meat for her, used water instead of broth in another dish; plus she bought ingredients and made a vegetarian side dish. It was a group effort, and it was fine. It would not have been fine for her to expect everyone to eat only her food, and expect the host to prepare it.
This made me laugh because my mother is very southern and is a great cook--in part because she puts pork/pork fat/duck fat in everything. One of my brothers has a new girlfriend who is vegan. My mother is trying to be supportive but it's like she has a mental block. As we were planning Christmas dinner she keeps asking my sister and me: "But I can use cheese, and K will eat it, right?" "No, mama" "So I can make [recipe with a pound of butter] and she will eat that, right?" "No, mama".
It was all fine and it isn't as if we felt like every dish had to be vegan but we wanted the girl to have something to eat!
And my mother will have to adjust better because they got engaged on Christmas day. Now we are all planning a vegan wedding for July...
I am pescatarian (mostly veg, but I go to a lot of business events and sometimes it's easier to take the fish option) and my good friend's Cuban mom is like your mother. My friend was making a roast pork, but there were black beans and rice and other things there (there is always something I can find to eat--bread and salad works just fine, if nothing else). So my friend says, "There's no meat in the black beans you made, right, Ma?" Her mother replied in her Cuban accent, "Oh, no, no meat. Just a little bacon for flavor."
And, when our daughter was a vegan I also learned that there were foods that she couldn't eat that were rather surprising such as gelatin and many "natural" flavorings & food additives.
In the USA, most gelatin is made of granulated pig skin, so people who don't eat swine products don't eat Jello, either.
Yes, maybe a bit different because I am vegan but I have to put with family members saying its too hard work to do vegan meals as well, despite the fact that they could just do vegan and everyone could eat that. Simple.
But it doesn't work that way, and you know it. Just bring your own plant-based food and offer to share it. If you don't cop an attitude, people might be open to trying something not animal based.
I don't eat meat, but I did for most of my life and I'm not about to start telling anyone else what they should or shouldn't eat or to accommodate my choice.
As a long time vegetarian, generally the only way family gatherings are affected is when Uncle Lenny notices someone is eating a veg plate and goes into an unsolicited 10 minute monologue about how much he just loooooves to eat meat.
There's always that one jackass who says, "Oooo, bacon, I can't live without bacon." I have a sister who loves to go into bloody detail about butchering deer when my vegan daughter and I are around. She thinks it's hilarious to do that.
My cousin used to work in a home for challenged children. There was a sign on the wall that said, "Ignore the behavior you do not want." I find that works everywhere.
What's the big deal? Vegan is hard, but roast some veggies and maybe saute some tofu on the side. Takes 20 minutes. Vegetarians are EASY to accommodate. My vegetarian best friend is commanded to make a veggie lasagna every year instead of a turkey for her parents, who are not vegetarians in any sense of the word. They just love her recipe.
Easiest thing in the world to feed a vegan: Make some rice and beans. If it is SO onerous to boil rice, buy the damn packets. Open a can of black beans. Add a can of tomatoes; if it's the kind with the chilies, even better. Or that Ro-Tel stuff. Or a jar of salsa. Voila, vegan main dish. Sometimes I add spinach.
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