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A lot of posters on here are judging 14 year olds by what 14 year olds were like 20 years ago. They are not the same today. When you see the young teens at the movie theaters, they are not always there just to watch a move. Many 14 year olds today are sexually experienced. I would not let a 14 year old go on a 1 on 1 date. I think a date at the house of one of the teens or a group date that is supervised is more appropriate.
As long as the parents pick them up and drop them off and all they are doing is sitting down to eat a meal by themselves and talk I don't see what the issue is.
There are going to a pizza place, sitting at a table with each other and eating food....
I'm sorry but I don't see the big deal in all this. Nor would I see a reason for a chaperon.
It's SITTING and EATING at a TABLE with EACH OTHER....they can do just that at lunch at school...
Unless I am missing or don't know something and this restaurant really doubles as a brothel and the tables flip out into mattresses....I mean...I don't see the issue...
Gawsh....I am glad I still have my child like quality where I don't over think stuff and put meaning to things where meaning shouldn't be..
You all see this as too serious and think of the worst possible scenario of them having sex...
But you have to think most 14 year olds aren't going to think HAHA my parents are letting me date lets screw on table!!!!!
A lot of them still think innocently and would just go to dinner and not do anything.
Its the adults that think OMG what could they do?!?!?! and then put ideas into their heads by even mentioning it..
Like when I was 15 our computer was in the basement and I wanted to snap a few shots to upload to myspace, I wanted to take an awesome picture of me in my mock neck underarmor and my sunglasses....I looked totally cool and I went upstairs to get the camera and my mom insisted she come downstairs to help me take them...I later realised that the only reason she came downstairs was to make sure I didn't take any dirty pictures....I didn't even THINK about doing that kind of stuff when I was 15!!!!! Those thoughts NEVER crossed my mind and I didn't even EVER like NEVER did it pass my mind in a passing thought or anything....EVER! It wasn't until my mom did that that I ever even thought about people doing that or anything and it was quite awhile before I figured out why she did it...
Its a shame adults make everything so sexual and perverse and then deem it off limits.
And I was 15 back in 2005 so it wasn't ALL that long ago..
Well the big date has happened.
And all went off without a hitch.
It was so cute.
He arrived with his father and came and knocked on the front door and I answered. The boy was nicely dressed in clean casual clothes. She had a nice short denim skirt and cute top. It's cool here in the evening so they each had a jumper (I think americans call them sweaters?)
Off she went.
To the local pizza shop where they will have to wait for a table. I was impressed that the young man had scouted out the shop and asked if he could book but they don't book tables. Its first in first served. Since they will be pretty early, they probably will not have to wait too long.
....time passes....
And there is a knock at the door.
Here he is with our daughter. Right on time.
In he comes and with a smile he says "I am handing her back to you sir". I think some of the evenings conversation had been her parents rules
Yes they held hands.
And did they kiss ?
He gave her a kiss on the cheek in the lounge in front of me.
Since it was only 7:30pm (They had left at 6pm) he asked if he could stay a while. I said yes. He went back outside and got his father. We played pool two dads and two kids. It was fun.
Wait you are telling me I am too young to date as well?
I think at 20 you're too young to be giving parenting advice....unless you were pregnant at 14 and have a 6 year old child at home.
I think at 14 dinner out with the family of the boyfriend or vice-versa is ok...but not alone. I've seen kids that age out alone and many act very immaturely in public without supervision.
I find it awkward that you are already talking about how you want your 14yr daughter to "we want her to be submitted to her husband" First off, why even having these thoughts for her at 14? Talk about pressure. Second of all, what about what SHE wants??
You're right, it isn't ANYTHING like expecting your teen to go to college right out of high school or anything like having expectations of any other kind.
Quote:
Originally Posted by txtqueen
Gawsh....I am glad I still have my child like quality where I don't over think stuff and put meaning to things where meaning shouldn't be..
I am so glad that you realize this. For the most part, you are a breath of fresh air on this board.
Quote:
Originally Posted by txtqueen
You all see this as too serious and think of the worst possible scenario of them having sex...
But you have to think most 14 year olds aren't going to think HAHA my parents are letting me date lets screw on table!!!!!
A lot of them still think innocently and would just go to dinner and not do anything.
Its the adults that think OMG what could they do?!?!?! and then put ideas into their heads by even mentioning it..
It is amazing how so many adults have such awful opinions of young people.
Well the big date has happened.
And all went off without a hitch.
It was so cute.
...
And there is a knock at the door.
Here he is with our daughter. Right on time.
In he comes and with a smile he says "I am handing her back to you sir". I think some of the evenings conversation had been her parents rules
Yes they held hands.
And did they kiss ?
He gave her a kiss on the cheek in the lounge in front of me.
Since it was only 7:30pm (They had left at 6pm) he asked if he could stay a while. I said yes. He went back outside and got his father. We played pool two dads and two kids. It was fun.
That is so cute!!! They must have felt so grown up. I can imagine that both dads were bursting with pride while you played pool.
I think at 20 you're too young to be giving parenting advice....unless you were pregnant at 14 and have a 6 year old child at home.
I think at 14 dinner out with the family of the boyfriend or vice-versa is ok...but not alone. I've seen kids that age out alone and many act very immaturely in public without supervision.
My daughter had her first date at 14. They were adorable. They went to have lunch then to a movie. They held hands.
Nothing immature about it.
They have also gone out a lot of other times since and have never been anything but mature.
My daughter went to the movies with about 8 other kids all 15-16. When I picked her up after, they were all standing in a bunch outside talking. All very well behaved.
I think a lot of the problem is adults expect the worst from kids. Some teens do get into trouble, but if adults didn't expect it so much from them, maybe the pressure would ease and everybody would be happy.
My daughter had her first date at 14. They were adorable. They went to have lunch then to a movie. They held hands.
Nothing immature about it.
They have also gone out a lot of other times since and have never been anything but mature.
My daughter went to the movies with about 8 other kids all 15-16. When I picked her up after, they were all standing in a bunch outside talking. All very well behaved.
I think a lot of the problem is adults expect the worst from kids. Some teens do get into trouble, but if adults didn't expect it so much from them, maybe the pressure would ease and everybody would be happy.
Not this adult, but I'm realistic about 14 year old kids.....I have 2 successful daughters myself, but I didn't allow them to "date" at that age.
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