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Who is talking about following a society? I'm talking about modesty and discretion regarding breastfeeding. I don't live in Iran, Afghanistan or Pakistan. I live in a very open Arab country that does not oppress women, but does quite the opposite and encourages them to succeed, especially in higher education and politics.
Go keep your eyes where they belong and you won't have that problem. Believe me the last thing I want in life is your eyes on my breasts. But if you happen to see a woman indiscretely breastfeeding then you need to get over it. If anything you should applaud her for having the guts to do so.
No, she should not let her baby starve, she should put its needs above her own and either choose a discrete location or stay at home!
The further down our society goes the further it disassociates itself from manners in public.
All kinds of things are as "nature intended them". That doesn't mean they should be done in public. Manners are for the consideration of others. Your response to me says that manners are not necessary as long as something is as "nature intended". IMO, those failing to practice manners are the selfish ones, not those expecting manners to be used.
Manners only go so far. You can't expect someone to constantly be avoiding everything someone ELSE might find offensive! It's considered by some that it's "polite" manners to say "happy holidays" instead of "merry Christmas" to people, but I disagree with that as well.
I shouldn't be forced to sit at home waiting for the "right time" to leave the house, or go to my car to feed my baby, or be relegated to an uncomfortable "stall" just because someone else MIGHT be offended by accidentally seeing a portion of my breast while I'm feeding my baby.
This has been said 100 times over in this thread.... MOST women who breastfeed in public do so in a discreet manner... meaning IF you notice that they are actually breastfeeding, you wouldn't be able to see any skin (certainly not as much skin as some women go around showing in their regular every day clothes). So manners ARE being used in almost every case.
Yes, if you know what to look for, you can tell when someone is breastfeeding under a blanket, under their shirt, or wrap... but just because you know, doesn't mean it's not being discreet or that she's exposing herself to anyone.
No, she should not let her baby starve, she should put its needs above her own and either choose a discrete location or stay at home!
The further down our society goes the further it disassociates itself from manners in public.
All kinds of things are as "nature intended them". That doesn't mean they should be done in public. Manners are for the consideration of others. Your response to me says that manners are not necessary as long as something is as "nature intended". IMO, those failing to practice manners are the selfish ones, not those expecting manners to be used.
You should keep your eyes where they belong. Bingo! Problem solved. There's nothing ill mannered about breastfeeding in public. I am sorry you feel otherwise. Why should I have to be forced to stay home or use pain in the neck bottles because you're uncomfortable with normal human behavior?
Nothing is disgusting or disturbing about an infant eating, at least not in my opinion. But people who compare breastfeeding with these other bodily functions are only countering the "It's natural" argument. This point, which I am not associated with at all, is never to be taken out of context.
Good, I didn't mean to imply that you are some kind of nut.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Vic 2.0
As for why a parent might avoid breastfeeding in public (other than to be "polite", always subjective of course), it may prove to be MORE practical. After all, if you manage your time properly, you can eat or do your shopping without interruption and feed your child where you are most comfortable doing so. .
Except, of course, that it doesn't always work out that way. My daughter could eat extensively and suddenly be hungry 30 minutes later. We're on a train. now what? She should have been fine for quite some time, but she isn't! You see, I can try to manage MY time as best as I can, but little junior might just have a different plan. Babies are not quite as predictable as you seem to think.
I am guessing that your son is still quite young. Be prepared to eat your own words in the not-so-far future - if you and your wife ever leave the house, that is...You will, invariably, find yourself in a situation where your own principles simply cannot be upheld. Now you need to ask yourself which factor is more relevant to you:
Feeding your hungry child, even though it's not a private as you'd like.
Upholding your principles even though it distresses your child and (I can promise you, your wife, too).
Upholding your principles even though not feeding your child makes him scream and thereby annoy the heck out of those around you. You'll likely get a few more "looks" than you would had you just taken care of your kid...
Chances are, when push comes to shove, that your wife is going to tell you to eat your principles and let her feed your child.
And....I have a simple solution for all of you who are "offended" by the sight of a mother nursing her baby. It's so simple, it's ridiculous:
DON'T LOOK!!!!!
LOL, you'd think... Of course, there are guys like this:
Quote:
Originally Posted by yeahboy79
Basically the women have every right to breastfeed in public but then I have every right to sit down and stare..and stare...and STARE....until they yell that they want some privacy.
No prob, vamos. And thank you for not gettin antagonistic
Quote:
Originally Posted by vamos
Except, of course, that it doesn't always work out that way. My daughter could eat extensively and suddenly be hungry 30 minutes later. We're on a train. now what? She should have been fine for quite some time, but she isn't! You see, I can try to manage MY time as best as I can, but little junior might just have a different plan. Babies are not quite as predictable as you seem to think.
You're saying your child would feed until full, and then be hungry a half hour afterwards? How often did this happen (please be honest)? And I "seem to think" babies are FAIRLY predictable for the same reason you seem to think they're not predictable at all, from experience. My kid wasn't some rare species like a few have suggested here. He's just an ordinary human child.
Quote:
Originally Posted by vamos
I am guessing that your son is still quite young. Be prepared to eat your own words in the not-so-far future - if you and your wife ever leave the house, that is...You will, invariably, find yourself in a situation where your own principles simply cannot be upheld. Now you need to ask yourself which factor is more relevant to you:
Feeding your hungry child, even though it's not a private as you'd like.
Upholding your principles even though it distresses your child and (I can promise you, your wife, too).
Well, people need to stop guessing. It's nothing but a hindrance. My son's 16 months old and very healthy. Not once did we have to feed him in a store or restaurant. I think we've fed him in the car a handful of times, but not many.
I never had to choose between my principles and feeding my son, because my principles never got in the way. Just my opinion from experience raising an alien baby
And I'll bet you there are more women in those arab countries that do breast feed in public underneath those burkas (sp?). But it is opressive to try to tell me and any other woman that she can't nurture and feed her child whever she needs to. Discretion doesn't mean hidden. You can be very discreet while breastfeeding... however, what difference does it really make if you do happen to OMG see her breast in between the baby starting or stopping feeding? More often than not, if the breast IS exposed it's for a half a second.. she's not taking all her clothes off to feed the baby, she's not taking her shirt off.. generally all that's happening is a small opening in the shirt is opening up to allow the child to latch on... so maybe if you're really attentive you might see a little flesh, probably less than Ms. Jackson's wardrobe malfunction (which I didn't see what the big tado about that was either).
Wow, you know animal science too.. you're amazing! LOL! You say that like this is supposed to make breastfeeding less of a wonder, when really it doesn't. Breastfeeding is an amazing gift that mother nature gave to females, it goes hand in hand with our ability to bring life into this world. It's a miracle and an amazing feat no matter which animal species does it!
Where did I "tell you and any other woman that she can't nuture and feed her child wherever she needs to"? Please provide the quote to support your statement. Where did I say anything about "hiding"?? Again, provide quote. If you take the time to actually read my posts you would see that my opinion is that women should use "discretion", especially if being looked at upsets them, unless the lack of discretion is their way of making a statement. You totally lost the sarcasm in my milk statement.
I really don't sit around "staring" at a woman who is breastfeeding, regardless if they are being discreet or making a point of being obvious about it. It doesn't interest me in the least and I don't think most people stop and stare and could care less. You are making it much bigger than it really is, but maybe that's because you think you are incredibly amazing, which you're not. Woman have been having babies and breastfeeding since the beginning of time.
It's called an abaya, and yes there are probably many women who are breast feeding under the abaya, which no one would know because the abaya provides privacy and the use of discretion.
Are we talking DISCRETE breast feeding, or "I can flip out my boob in public, and you can't stop me"?
I'm in favor of 1, and against 2.
I would love to live in a society that considers a mother breastfeeding her child to be a thing of beauty. Not something to be gaped at or mocked. Something to be respected with the highest sincerity.
This society is so stupid.
I can't believe this is even an issue.
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You say that like this is supposed to make breastfeeding less of a wonder, when really it doesn't. Breastfeeding is an amazing gift that mother nature gave to females, it goes hand in hand with our ability to bring life into this world. It's a miracle and an amazing feat no matter which animal species does it!
