Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
What a nut! And I am impressed at the patience of this man after putting up with this unbelievable woman! She was so adamant of not letting this guy in yet she freely gave her apartment number. Did she want him to pay her a visit?
The problem being that the man had already keyed in.
I don't think she was coming in. I think she was leaving. To take her dog out to do its business. As she opened the door to exit, this guy was coming in. She had been handling her dog, so she hadn't seen him key in. He went to enter, she blocked his way. He told her he had used his entry card or fob or whatever, she decided not to believe him. And even after showing his card/fob/keys, she refused to believe him. Even after he named the building's managers, she refused to believe him. Finally, he pushed through.
And even at this point I would have excused her as just being extremely cautious. But she proceeds to get in the elevator with him, she proceeds to follow him to his apartment, she proceeds to watch him let himself into his apartment with his key, and she proceeds to call the police. She went way beyond reasonable.
I got the sense she realized she might be wrong the closer she got to his apartment.
It went from “prove to me you live here” at the door to “you must not live here, who are you visiting?” in the elevator to “I just want to know the names of my neighbors” outside his door lol. But by then she was in too deep to back down apparently. Heh
I would love to hear the scenario in her head used to justify calling the police though.
There is absolutely nothing in this that points to race as a factor - at all.
Makes one wonder about people who do see that.
She may not know every one in the apartment but she seemed pretty clear that a black person didn't live there. Unfortunately for her she doesn't get a do over to prove she does the same thing to white women who she is unfamiliar with. Black people who get policed a lot by random whites who should be minding their business will say been there done that.
I don't know for sure what happened before the video started.
Some people are presuming that he was tailgating her entrance--I don't see that for sure.
Nor do I see for sure that he had keyed in his own entrance.
I've worked in secured buildings all my adult life, and the hard instruction has always been, "no tailgating, close the door behind you, everyone must enter by his own badge swipe/combination/key."
Either one of them should have insisted on that process, if, in fact, he was attempting to tailgate. The fact that neither mentioned it is part of why I'm not sure that's what occurred.
With the first part of the video missing, it's hard to tell how this started but BOTH appear to have taken it to some argumentative extreme.
I live in / visit high rises like this all the time. There are rules, ways this situation is supposed to work. "Tailgating" - particularly at night with no concierge - is considered to be rude behavior because it puts the person with the key bob in the position of vouching for you.
I thought maybe she was about to leave the building to walk her dog? If she saw him behind the glass, she should have slowed down to allow him to buzz himself in. It wasn't her position to question him but then it also wasn't her responsibility to open the door for him. HE needed to do it with his key bob.
If he'd been coming in behind her, then it was his responsibility to slow down, wait for the door to close, then open it himself. She didn't need to go cop on him but instead to politely close the door in his face. Those are the rules. Sure sometimes folks will decide not to but usually the second person will hold back to wait for a go ahead from the person with the key bob. If they don't receive permission to enter, then wait for the door to close and pull out your own key.
It's this simple, folks. For some reason, it did not play out this way between these two. The guy appears to have taken some offense at something then pulled out his phone. He wanted her out of the way and she wanted to argue. What they BOTH needed to do what to shut that door then use their own key bobs to go whatever ways he/she originally intended.
What a nut! And I am impressed at the patience of this man after putting up with this unbelievable woman! She was so adamant of not letting this guy in yet she freely gave her apartment number. Did she want him to pay her a visit?
I got the sense she realized she might be wrong the closer she got to his apartment.
It went from “prove to me you live here” at the door to “you must not live here, who are you visiting?” in the elevator to “I just want to know the names of my neighbors” outside his door lol. But by then she was in too deep to back down apparently. Heh
I would love to hear the scenario in her head used to justify calling the police though.
I think calling the police on him indicates she didn't believe him the closer they got. So why ask his name? She wouldn't have believed him anyway.
It figures the usual right wing mob here are taking up for the cop calling nutbag.
What if when the cops showed up and he wasn't able to open the door, they then decide to bust the door down? Anything could have happened. I regret she lost her job though.
The problem being that the man had already keyed in.
I don't think she was coming in. I think she was leaving. To take her dog out to do its business. As she opened the door to exit, this guy was coming in. She had been handling her dog, so she hadn't seen him key in. He went to enter, she blocked his way. He told her he had used his entry card or fob or whatever, she decided not to believe him. And even after showing his card/fob/keys, she refused to believe him. Even after he named the building's managers, she refused to believe him. Finally, he pushed through.
Once again, the quick and easy resolution from either of them would have been, "Let me close the door and you can key in."
I've been in that situation a thousand times, having worked in such facilities continuously since 1973. It's no big deal. If I find myself in that situation, I will actually step back and let the door close, then key in. I've done it that way innumerable times. That's how it's supposed to work.
Quote:
And even at this point I would have excused her as just being extremely cautious.
If indeed he caught her just as she opened the door, I would not consider it "extremely cautious" for her to have said, "Let me close the door and you can key in." I'd consider that normal caution, and in fact, the correct procedure.
Or he could have and should have suggested it herself.
With the first part of the video missing, it's hard to tell how this started but BOTH appear to have taken it to some argumentative extreme.
I live in / visit high rises like this all the time. There are rules, ways this situation is supposed to work. "Tailgating" - particularly at night with no concierge - is considered to be rude behavior because it puts the person with the key bob in the position of vouching for you.
I thought maybe she was about to leave the building to walk her dog? If she saw him behind the glass, she should have slowed down to allow him to buzz himself in. It wasn't her position to question him but then it also wasn't her responsibility to open the door for him. HE needed to do it with his key bob.
If he'd been coming in behind her, then it was his responsibility to slow down, wait for the door to close, then open it himself. She didn't need to go cop on him but instead to politely close the door in his face. Those are the rules. Sure sometimes folks will decide not to but usually the second person will hold back to wait for a go ahead from the person with the key bob. If they don't receive permission to enter, then wait for the door to close and pull out your own key.
It's this simple, folks. For some reason, it did not play out this way between these two. The guy appears to have taken some offense at something then pulled out his phone. He wanted her out of the way and she wanted to argue. What they BOTH needed to do what to shut that door then use their own key bobs to go whatever ways he/she originally intended.
The problem being that the man had already keyed in.
I don't think she was coming in. I think she was leaving. To take her dog out to do its business. As she opened the door to exit, this guy was coming in. She had been handling her dog, so she hadn't seen him key in. He went to enter, she blocked his way. He told her he had used his entry card or fob or whatever, she decided not to believe him. And even after showing his card/fob/keys, she refused to believe him. Even after he named the building's managers, she refused to believe him. Finally, he pushed through.
And even at this point I would have excused her as just being extremely cautious. But she proceeds to get in the elevator with him, she proceeds to follow him to his apartment, she proceeds to watch him let himself into his apartment with his key, and she proceeds to call the police. She went way beyond reasonable.
That's the problem, he hadn't or at least the video strongly suggests he had not.
I actually went back and listened to the video a second time. The woman appeared to be leaving. He assumes she's going to let him thru then appears offended when she does not. Instead of apologetically saying she'd like to follow the rules, she instead confronts with this idiotic apartment number conversation.
At that point he's already filming, which is a bit odd. It doesn't help that he appeared to lie to her about using the key card. He says he used it. She says he hadn't (usually the buzz is audible, at least on the ones I'm used to). He says, well it doesn't really matter. And off the argument continues. The guy is well spoken etc. and she doesn't appear to have ever been afraid.
Both - in their own ways - took what should have been something innocuous to extremes. Neither wanted to back down. He pulls out a phone - why???, just use your frigging key fop.
From the video it appears she felt he had not made a "legal" entry, by pushing by her. How THAT happened isn't clear. It's omitted from the video, but she's clearly startled and angry.
He's correct that it was not her building but she'd opened the door for herself not for him.
She wasn't the doorman.
Edited to add - Actually went back a third time, jeez, he appears to have consistently refused to even show her a key fob at least by the video end. I think she believed him from relatively early on. Rather he got offended (his mind) and she didn't want to be pushed around (her mind). This is sad.
Last edited by EveryLady; 10-16-2018 at 05:26 PM..
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
