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Vol sorta nailed it. If you are dude who's discarded in the dating game, you are just lazy. A woman can increase her sex/marriage value by just working out and staying in shape. Men have to be really put together on all fronts, especially considering women are generally more put together than men. That's just the nature of the game.
I disagree with him on that there isn't a competition with other men. If you are making low six figures, in good shape, aren't some weirdo/creep, and are of an appropriate height in some markets, you are really standing out in those markets. In other markets, you are going to have to be raking in higher six figures and/or have a good degree of charm/personality/social skills/intellect to be a magnet for fit women. Unless you're that guy who's just smashing average looking or 40 something divorced broads who want a man-toy or that dude who just knocks up low quality women out of wedlock in their 20s because both of you were too stupid/irresponsible to use any form of BC.
And yet look all around you at the average looking, below average looking, out of shape low wage earning men who are married or in relationships.
Somehow the scenario of 90% of men being discarded in the dating game does not line up with what we actually see IRL.
The gender pay gap exists almost entirely because of the choices women make. The domestic work gap exists almost entirely due to the decisions women make. The lack of female CEO's etc exists almost entirely due to the decisions women make.
Nope it's the oppressive patriacys doing.
Oh, you are talking about the few women who mention the gender pay gap. I have never heard of that being called a crisis, nor have I seen any thread crying gender pay gap crisis, nor blaming men for it, actually, it has pretty much been dismissed. I agree that the overall discrepancy in pay is due to women being the ones to forgo career to care for children and career choices often based on caring for children. Whose decision it is, IDK. I'm guessing a joint decision, but most men do not want to be SAHDs, take lower paying or part time jobs for flexibility, give up pay raises or promotions. That is for couples to decide.
It does seem that one of the things changing is women deciding not to have kids or not to forgo their careers to care for kids. This can be seen in the decreased birth rate and people marrying and having kids later in life. This is what women are doing instead of sitting back and blaming men.
And yet look all around you at the average looking, below average looking, out of shape low wage earning men who are married or in relationships.
Somehow the scenario of 90% of men being discarded in the dating game does not line up with what we actually see IRL.
I hope I am not being heard as implying there is a crisis of any sort. I don't think there is.
I think men have the same value proposition they always did, the same "nobody GAFF about you unless you provide some value" general view from society at large, and that general indifference about our condition that has been the burden of men since the beginning of time.
It's not new. More women in college and the workforce didn't change it. Feminism didn't change it. Social media didn't change it. All the modern world did was turn everyone EXCEPT men into victims, and now some men want to have a seat at the victim table because they feel left out. Those select "men" might be in crisis, but the average man of 2022 has it roughly the same as the average man of 2022 BC. Nobody cares how you feel, suck it up Buttercup, go earn your keep, tears are only authorized on the gold medal podium and at your mom's/dog's funeral, etc.
If you can't find a date, your problem is in the mirror. Nobody will help you fix it, you're on your own. If you can't find a job, a career, or anything else as a grown man, same rule applies - nobody cares, fix it yourself. A pattern emerges...nobody cares about grown men, fix it yourself.
I hope I am not being heard as implying there is a crisis of any sort. I don't think there is.
I think men have the same value proposition they always did, the same "nobody GAFF about you unless you provide some value" general view from society at large, and that general indifference about our condition that has been the burden of men since the beginning of time.
It's not new. More women in college and the workforce didn't change it. Feminism didn't change it. Social media didn't change it. All the modern world did was turn everyone EXCEPT men into victims, and now some men want to have a seat at the victim table because they feel left out. Those select "men" might be in crisis, but the average man of 2022 has it roughly the same as the average man of 2022 BC. Nobody cares how you feel, suck it up Buttercup, go earn your keep, tears are only authorized on the gold medal podium and at your mom's/dog's funeral, etc.
If you can't find a date, your problem is in the mirror. Nobody will help you fix it, you're on your own. If you can't find a job, a career, or anything else as a grown man, same rule applies - nobody cares, fix it yourself. A pattern emerges...nobody cares about grown men, fix it yourself.
What you are not considering is that it has been no different (providing value) for women than it has for men. What has been seen as value for each sex has just been different and pretty much wrapped up in a tidy box. I think today, call it feminism or evolution or progression, but the changing of traditional gender roles and stereotyping has lifted old requirements and value is now in the eye of the beholder.
Oh, you are talking about the few women who mention the gender pay gap. I have never heard of that being called a crisis, nor have I seen any thread crying gender pay gap crisis, nor blaming men for it, actually, it has pretty much been dismissed. I agree that the overall discrepancy in pay is due to women being the ones to forgo career to care for children and career choices often based on caring for children. Whose decision it is, IDK. I'm guessing a joint decision, but most men do not want to be SAHDs, take lower paying or part time jobs for flexibility, give up pay raises or promotions. That is for couples to decide.
It does seem that one of the things changing is women deciding not to have kids or not to forgo their careers to care for kids. This can be seen in the decreased birth rate and people marrying and having kids later in life. This is what women are doing instead of sitting back and blaming men.
Well you clearly have not been reading the mainstream media in Australia.
Don't get that promotion you want - Patriarchy, are made homeless for whatever reason - patriarchy. The reason why men tend to not take up childcare responsibilities - Patriarchy
Heck they would find a way to blame men for the periods if they could - hey wait men can cure those as well.
Well you clearly have not been reading the mainstream media in Australia.
Don't get that promotion you want - Patriarchy, are made homeless for whatever reason - patriarchy. The reason why men tend to not take up childcare responsibilities - Patriarchy
Heck they would find a way to blame men for the periods if they could - hey wait men can stop those as well.
And yet look all around you at the average looking, below average looking, out of shape low wage earning men who are married or in relationships.
Somehow the scenario of 90% of men being discarded in the dating game does not line up with what we actually see IRL.
I guess it depends on markets and age. Out of the 35 and younger crowd, overweight and/or child burdened women and low quality and/or overweight men tend to be very single in my neck of the woods unless they settle for each other. And it's sort of just that, settling. They don't really have the range of options and freedom/demand as others do. If you have enough dating marketplace value as a male or female, there's really no reason to ever settle down if having kids aren't on high on your priorities.
I guess it depends on markets and age. Out of the 35 and younger crowd, overweight and/or child burdened women and low quality and/or overweight men tend to be very single in my neck of the woods unless they settle for each other. And it's sort of just that, settling. They don't really have the range of options and freedom/demand as others do. If you have enough dating marketplace value as a male or female, there's really no reason to ever settle down if having kids aren't on high on your priorities.
So average people are paring up. You assume they are just settling. And the real issue (crisis) as was guessed early on is that men are not able to get laid by the 10 they think they deserve.
I guess it depends on markets and age. Out of the 35 and younger crowd, overweight and/or child burdened women and low quality and/or overweight men tend to be very single in my neck of the woods unless they settle for each other. And it's sort of just that, settling. They don't really have the range of options and freedom/demand as others do. If you have enough dating marketplace value as a male or female, there's really no reason to ever settle down if having kids aren't on high on your priorities.
Just go to any sports bar and look around. You’ll see plenty of couples that have settled. I always find it interesting that the longer they stay together, the more they start looking the same. See that 280 lb guy eating nachos and rooting for the Cowboys? Good chance his gal is a buck eighty sporting a Dallas jersey herself. It’s fairly common. As long as the beer and nachos keep coming, the Cowboys keep winning and she sticks around, there is no crisis!
No idea what you are referring to in the bolded? You simply cannot pay someone less based on their gender, besides in a capital market if you can get a person to do the same job for cheaper logic says you will get the lower paid person every time.
These gaps usually have very logical reasons, I worked as an accountant specializing in health care sector in my previous life, and can tell you, part the reason for the gap in the Higher paid health care professions, is that women tend more to the security of full time paid employment in the public sector. While men tend more to take the risk buy all the equipment and open private practices.
You have to pay all the profits from a private practice out of the business as wages to themselves under the tax laws that exist here. Their are exceptions of course, but I wont bore you with all that.
Even Uber has a worldwide gender pay gap, the men drive slightly quicker, know the street layouts better and hang around in the job for longer.
The bottom line is that men and women are different, and measurable inequalities will always exist while we are able to make our own decisions.
Last edited by danielsa1775; 10-11-2022 at 03:23 PM..
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