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Real life is different from Citi-Data.com. Citi-Data.com is a place people go to in order to vent and/or to tell other people they're wrong. Unless you're intentionally trying to agree with everyone else here, or you're avoiding controversial topics, people are probably going to be snappy to you, and I don't believe there's much you can do to change that. I'd leave the website if it's bothering you a lot.
I sometimes make common sense statements, or simple, amusing statements. Other times I'll spend an hour or more on a single post. The posts I've spent an hour or more on almost always get more snappy comments and fewer likes than some poorly thought out catchy phrase I posted on a whim.
You might be able to reduce the number of people who think you're a troll by having your posts be grammatically correct as possible and making sure your statements are clear as possible and make as much sense as possible...maybe. I've glanced at a few of your posts and a few of your threads. I didn't notice much that was particularly bad about them. You communicate more clearly than several non-autistic people on this website.
In this recent post you made, I would have changed this: Anyone other autistic people have the same problem too? Best advice
To "Do any other autistic people, or anyone else, have the same problem too? Best advice?"
I don't know what your weaknesses and strengths are in real life, so I won't comment on how to improve social skills in real life.
That's a pretty good post. (Continued below.)
Quote:
Originally Posted by KaraZetterberg153
OMG, you're right. Hadn't thought of it like that. Brilliant!
I picked up like six or seven snarky responses this morning and instead of defending myself, I just ignored them. (I'm not supposed to bicker.). Much better. Funny how verbal challenges can raise the blood pressure and negatively affect mood.
I've taught music to a number of people with autism over the years. It's very wide spectrum; some do very well and others, no success at all. If you preseverate, that's good for musicians. One beautiful little girl could not process language and I got nowhere. Another little boy was violent and I had to discontinue lessons. But if you're sensitive, Clintone is right; maybe you should find some other activity to do. Piano lessons? There are a lot of really disturbed people online.
Good idea.
Just noting, you two are describing forums in general, not City-Data at least from my perspective. My experience is that forum moderation generally sets the tone for member behavior. Forums that get over-moderated anger the members who then rebel against too aggressive moderation. Then they get to fighting with each other. Just saying.
Is not that I get disturbed easily. Rather that I get persecuted very easily and that's it, people don't want to like help me through. And is funny cause it seems the more overly autistic a person is, the more assistance he or she seems to get.
But I agree is a very diverse spectrum. Just like the LGBT.
I didn't read the whole topic, only up to your post above. It's getting late for me and I have to get to sleep.
However you seem to be maintaining so far. If your demeanor in this topic is representative of your usual posting then so far I don't see any problem.
The post you are referring to offered a good idea. I play a musical instrument myself, just to satisfy my creative desires and express myself. It's pretty relaxing too.
I always reach a point with forums that I have to go away for a while and let the food fight continue without me.
Yeah, that's another downside. That I can't distinguish people who are mean for the sake of just being mean, from people who just literally hate autistic people. And thus the reason why its so hard for me to take any negative comments at all.
And while it would be nice for the autism community to have it's revolution like LGBT is currently having, there are some problems though
1. Even though autism rates are increasing big time already, is supposedly white men who have the highest rates. But that's BS, but however I did hear that there are some sexist and racist biases too in the case of diagnosises.
And no I don't identify white, at least not culturally
2. Autism is something very hard to still study
And
3. In our society, ableism and prejudice against autistic or mental people in general is sadly more justifiable and tolerated. I imagine big pharma plays a huge role into this one. But even some of the most liberal people I have ever encountered think the cost for autistic people is pretty high and think they rather have autism and down syndrome babies aborted and ****.
Mod cut.
Last edited by PJSaturn; 03-26-2018 at 12:38 PM..
Reason: Off-topic.
Yeah, that's another downside. That I can't distinguish people who are mean for the sake of just being mean, from people who just literally hate autistic people. And thus the reason why its so hard for me to take any negative comments at all.
You may be misinterpreting just ordinary forum hostility as behind being directed as you because of your condition. Maybe they are just hateful people. I suggest you might try not mentioning your condition. Also, you might consider just ignoring the snide remarks. That's what most of us do. It's called, "Do not feed the trolls."
Here's some helpful advice, not just for you, but anyone suffering any kind of social disability. Or just a "normal" person. Anyone really.
Embrace the fear. Realize that fear is sometimes valid, and being afraid is your minds way of motivating you to run away. Because sometimes, really a lot of times, fear is real, and valid. It doesn't mean there is something wrong with you. It means there is some sort of danger, and you are supposed to listen and act on the fear.
Even very intelligent people who are sure they understand other people can suffer from posting on forums. You are exposing your mind to possible toxic and unpleasant information, interactions with faceless strangers, who may have all the compassion of an 18 wheeler with it's brakes locked up on black ice at night, heading for you at 80 mph sideways.
You can ask for help in dealing with this, but the real advice is to get off the information superhighway and find some meaning in the real world. Posting (and especially reading) forums is a luxury, and it costs you in time and energy.
If your life is so great forums are your big problem, then you have got it made somehow. You have a device and probably wireless internet, and time to spend. This makes you one of the few (relative, not actual) people in the world with the luxury of worrying about something completely meaningless to almost everybody else in the world.
The most helpful thing to learn would be that many people care about their own well being, but just don't actually care at all for others online. Or even worse. They actually get enjoyment in imagining you suffer, and that they are the cause. (or worse, that somehow you are the cause)
It's true. Some people (with the luxury of time and technology) get enjoyment from posting stupid crap online just to cause others to suffer. Or at the very least, to make themselves seem smart, and you are not smart like them. If you can understand this, if you can think about it, and realize it is true (and not something just made up), you suddenly are in a different place. Of course if you can do this, realize such a profound truth about human beings online, you probably won't suffer or experience much fear from that point on.
Your life will be better. But only if you choose to walk away, not join in the messy and pointless exercise in stupidity that is so often the overwhelming theme of much of the internet, twitter, facebook and any other medium that simply allows anyone, at anytime, to post whatever idiot idea that pops into existence.
There is a path to freedom and fun, but most will reject it, choosing instead to fight, or worse, join in the chorus of pointless opinion and futile meanderings of typing out words on a device, then hitting "post".
(and yes, all the above was done with full awareness that it is hopelessly ironic)
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