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Like several others said, you NEED to make some friends first, and it goes beyond making friends to meet girls. It's much harder to have success with woman who are complete strangers as opposed to getting introduced or meeting through a friend. Much easier. But you really need friends for other reasons as well. If you met a girl right now, You'd run into a couple of issues. One of those - she's probably going to think something is wrong with you if you are a complete loner. Second - most woman don't want a guy clinging to them 24/7. You have no friends, this is going to make you very clingy as your entire world is going to revolve around her. It will run her off. Either at first, or some where down the road when the newness wears off assuming there is this instant spark which I can't see happening because you reek of desperation (don't take that personally, i'm just giving you an honest opinion because desperation will run a girl off). How are you going to feel when she wants to go out with the girls on a Friday night? You're going to sit at home feeling sorry for yourself? Get out, meet people with no intentions. Guys and girls, no intentions other than making friends. You do this, and I gurantee you, you'll catch some girls eye and she'll drop the hint she is interested. Thats much easier than going into a bar or club, no experience, no or little self confidence and trying to pick up women who have their defenses up.
Like several others said, you NEED to make some friends first, and it goes beyond making friends to meet girls. It's much harder to have success with woman who are complete strangers as opposed to getting introduced or meeting through a friend. Much easier. But you really need friends for other reasons as well. If you met a girl right now, You'd run into a couple of issues. One of those - she's probably going to think something is wrong with you if you are a complete loner. Second - most woman don't want a guy clinging to them 24/7. You have no friends, this is going to make you very clingy as your entire world is going to revolve around her. It will run her off. Either at first, or some where down the road when the newness wears off assuming there is this instant spark which I can't see happening because you reek of desperation (don't take that personally, i'm just giving you an honest opinion because desperation will run a girl off). How are you going to feel when she wants to go out with the girls on a Friday night? You're going to sit at home feeling sorry for yourself? Get out, meet people with no intentions. Guys and girls, no intentions other than making friends. You do this, and I gurantee you, you'll catch some girls eye and she'll drop the hint she is interested. Thats much easier than going into a bar or club, no experience, no or little self confidence and trying to pick up women who have their defenses up.
good post.. however, it is simply unrealistic for men who were born loners to enact.
sure these loner men, might be able to meet friends while they were kids, but once you become an adult and everyone is doing their own thing, and it's harder to meet friends for everyone, it becomes near impossible for a loner born to find quality friends.
The OP would have better luck by just focusing on his job and finding a way to make good money where he can meet a wife from a foreign relationship meetup website.
Its a Friday night, I'm 24 and have no real friends my age to go anywhere with so I'm relegated to just sitting in my lonely apartment again surfing the web.
I've tried volunteering, going to events, etc. but still I rarely meet any eligible girls (mostly old people). I'm interested in too many unusual things most my age have zero knowledge in. So, I honestly don't know what to do anymore to meet girls...and I realize that at the rate I'm going, I'll be alone for the rest of my life unless I get out more. I've never been into the bar or club scene and don't think I'd want to meet a girl from there.
I miss having a close-knit community of people to confide with, like how it was in high school and to a lesser extent college (I was a commuter student that rarely got involved in school activities).
What are my options?
PS: I've looked into online dating sites but never found a girl from those that I'd be interested in dating.
I'm 32. I use to be somewhat in that mindset. I think with dating between the age of 20-26, you have to get *CLEAR* about where are you really, and *What* do you really want. 95% of guys in your situation don't have those two things.
1st - I think attracting the opposite sex comes from 80% social skills and 20% looks, personal hygiene, that's it! Social skills are really...can you interact with people. Can you talk on the phone? Can you make it through an hour date, 2 hour date? 20% looks is basically personal hygiene, looking presentable.
2nd - What do you *Really* want? I bet a lot of guys (myself included at one point) are somewhat intimidated by girls if they played full out, 100%. What if you attract someone. What if you can't handle her? What if I disappoint her?
Etc. So guys subconsciously get in this shell.
Not saying everyone is like this. But subconsciously I bet it theres for many guys. Much easier to be on the computer, at home....doing this routine, than taking some sort of chance on something new (like if you're good with girls). If you're interested in unusual things, find people with unusual interests. I think many guys go to the mainstream (like this site) for advice about things that are too unusual for the average person. Meet girls at horror conventions, record shops, online interests....youtube, you can find just about any interest.
Its a Friday night, I'm 24 and have no real friends my age to go anywhere with so I'm relegated to just sitting in my lonely apartment again surfing the web.
I've tried volunteering, going to events, etc. but still I rarely meet any eligible girls (mostly old people). I'm interested in too many unusual things most my age have zero knowledge in. So, I honestly don't know what to do anymore to meet girls...and I realize that at the rate I'm going, I'll be alone for the rest of my life unless I get out more. I've never been into the bar or club scene and don't think I'd want to meet a girl from there.
I miss having a close-knit community of people to confide with, like how it was in high school and to a lesser extent college (I was a commuter student that rarely got involved in school activities).
What are my options?
PS: I've looked into online dating sites but never found a girl from those that I'd be interested in dating.
LOL Don't panic man 24 is very very young. Just do whatever you like to do. I know that sounds odd and doesn't seem like it has worked so far. But for those of us that aren't natural skirt chasers, it's much easier to find women when you're not really looking for them. And nothing is more attractive than not trying too hard to be attractive. If you meet someone you like don't be afraid to ask her out. She can only say yes or no and if you don't ask you'll never date her. Women come in as many different varieties as men do. I know women that are addicted to WoW, Fantasy Football, Play Hockey, Chess, have a thing for skinny men, fat men, short men, tall men, bald men, geeks, freaks, metro-sexuals u name it. Trust me the girl for you is out there you just haven't met her yet.
PS: I've looked into online dating sites but never found a girl from those that I'd be interested in dating.
Are you kidding? Online dating has saved so many socially awkward, geeky, etc. types from being alone. Even they can find love online. With all of the resources at your hand today compared to a decade ago or more ago, there's no excuse for being able to at least find a woman to hang out with. You will remain alone if you display that sort of attitude toward women when talking to them. If you have to, at least fake that you are a little more positive, upbeat, and full of interesting things to talk about and a good conversationalist. Those things alone will usually get you a woman cuddling on your couch eventually.
Meet girls at horror conventions, record shops, online interests....youtube, you can find just about any interest.
Yeah, but does this ever work? I'm under the assumption that you need to first have some previous encounters with a girl before she'd be willing to go out with you i.e. in the same class, organization, etc. in order to build trust.
You can't just ask out a stranger girl...if only it were that easy. Unfortunately all the organizations in my area bore me, I'd much rather pursue my interests than be fake and join something I have little interest in just to meet girls - so here is where I get lost, I never meet girls doing what I do.
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