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I am a "career woman" as you say. Why should I settle for someone who does not hold themselves to the standards I hold myself to? I don't mean that cruelly - your priorities are different from a woman who has focused on her education and career. When I look for a partner, I look for someone who shares my values. A person who has not furthered their education (formally or informally) or focused on their career does not share my values.
Similarly, I don't try to date people who are lifting weights every day at the gym because that's not a standard I hold myself to and would be imbalanced and probably lead to a lot of frustration on my part.
You should be looking for a woman who shares your values.
I find it hard to imagine living in a society where being picky about your partner is NOT a virtue. Why should I spend my time and energy building a life with a person who does not match me in a logical way?
I went on a date last night with a guy who was attractive, worked as a lawyer at a major area firm, and had an apartment with no roommates in a very desirable area of town (and if you are dating in Boston, it's a huge financial indicator to live on your own at all since it is so expensive). He was 32 and single, which I thought was strange considering all of these fantastic qualities that he had. He spent a good portion of the date whining about how women generally don't respond to his messages on online dating sites and then making statements like, "I think women, at the heart of things, all like to be submissive in a relationship" and "Men can't *really* be bisexual - I can't imagine it so it can't be so!"
He emailed me this morning asking for a second date. I will say no with no reservations. He was attractive, wildly successful, smart, ambitious, articulate, and his misogyny shined through everything that he said. It's no surprise to me why he can't find a date because that one facet of his personality wipes out all the positives. It was always women's fault to him. He never looked at the common denominator - himself.
I take huge issue with your stance...and this is a perfect example of the some of the problems with ulra picky American women. Values have nothing to do with a college degree that is asinine. What if Mr. Liberal Arts cheats on you what about those values? You're telling me you would not go out with a smart, hard working, attractive guy....just because he does not have a degree? What if he owned his own business? What if he was still working on a degree? What if he "had" a degree but still didn't make much money? Admit it...it's all about money a lot of women just use the degree line as an excuse to try and mask it.
I don't get what the second part of your post proves...it actually supports my case more than anything. The lawyer had a degree and money but his personality seemed lacking. Maybe you're not so sure after all what a good man is and should re-think your strategy? In my opinion money is the main thing to you. I'm glad you posted though this is exactly the type of women that are left out there for guys like me to try and date in America.
I take huge issue with your stance...and this is a perfect example of the some of the problems with ulra picky American women. Values have nothing to do with a college degree that is asinine. What if Mr. Liberal Arts cheats on you what about those values? You're telling me you would not go out with a smart, hard working, attractive guy....just because he does not have a degree? What if he owned his own business? What if he was still working on a degree? What if he "had" a degree but still didn't make much money? Admit it...it's all about money a lot of women just use the degree line as an excuse to try and mask it.
I don't get what the second part of your post proves...it actually supports my case more than anything. The lawyer had a degree and money but his personality seemed lacking. Maybe you're not so sure after all what a good man is and should re-think your strategy? In my opinion money is the main thing to you. I'm glad you posted though this is exactly the type of women that are left out there for guys like me to try and date in America.
Because this guys is a whiny,judgemental tool it's her being too picky o.O?
Because this guys is a whiny,judgemental tool it's her being too picky o.O?
Huh? You make no sense...the fancy pants Boston guy with money and a law degree that she went out on a date with was the dud, so her selection method is flawed (common). According to her, he has better values than a guy like me..."just" because he has a degree. It totally proves one of my points. Lot's of great women that are already married...the problem is the ones that are left. For a guy that is a late bloomer it is hard. It's a numbers game...so looking in other countries is smart. Especially when women in America expect a 10 and have a 20 page long checklist.
Huh? You make no sense...the fancy pants Boston guy with money and a law degree that she went out on a date with was the dud, so her selection method is flawed (common). According to her, he has better values than a guy like me..."just" because he has a degree. It totally proves one of my points. Lot's of great women that are already married...the problem is the ones that are left. For a guy that is a late bloomer it is hard. It's a numbers game...so looking in other countries is smart. Especially when women in America expect a 10 and have a 20 page long checklist.
She said... advanced his education either formally or informally.
This is an angry , misdirected jumbled mess of a post.
you launched into a tirade
Never did that don't confuse what everyone else is posting with me.
Uhhhh...like I said, you got the ball rolling, with your initial post, which if memory serves me correctly, DID talk about mail order brides...don't get it twisted the idea that American/Western women are 'gold-digging, ball-breaking, materialistic, superficial princesses with a vast and undeserved entitlement complex'
Never said this , is this what YOU believe?
Its clear that women these days have been conditioned to expect something that is not at all realistic out of men.
No, the only thing that's clear here is that you think you're entitled to sit in judgement on an imaginary throne, and whine like an air raid siren because some women aren't puckering up to kiss your grits fast enough...you may not have SAID this verbatim, but that's what came through
getting your radar fixed so that you stop running into those types that reject you at every turn? Not going to apologize for what I'm attracted to. I won't date women simply for the sake of dating them if I'm not into their appearance.
And guess what, sporty? Those women aren't gonna/shouldn't HAVE TO apologize for at least being direct enough to tell you that you don't float their boat
let me blow up another of your carefully held myths---that all women want Brad Pitt...been married to my wonderful Western-American wife for 5 yrs, together 8 total, and I can say without shame that I sure as HELL ain't Brad Pitt
I have no information nor do I want any on who you are married to , but I am speaking for all the single women at least - the 25-33ish aged crowd to be specific.
Newsflash--- you got the info, whether you wanted it or not, and I used my own situation to illustrate why you need to suck it up and quit crying, and using some BS stereotype to justify said crying...and that license you THINK you have to 'speak for all single women 25-33'? It's about to get revoked with the quickness, because there are quite a few women in that age-group here in this thread, who will tell you point-blank that your a** doesn't speak for ANY of them...project much, do ya?
getting your radar fixed so that you stop running into those types that reject you at every turn? Or doing a bit of self-examination after said rejections---i.e. trying to break down what you may have done or said wrong
I have said multiple times , its not me. I have been a perfect gentleman and have done and said all the right things on my dates. Its pretty much that George Clooney wasn't sitting across from them that was the problem.
Well, I wish all of us guys could be as perfect as you...and give me a break on that George Clooney malarkey...you got called out, or some woman/women weren't buying what you were selling, so therefore you run around with your willie bent at a 45-degree angle, putting women into some stereotypical basket because YOU weren't who they were looking for
And in conclusion, I have my stuff quite together , good job, apartment, car , keep a clean appearance, friendly, just take a look at most of America these days in comparison. A gal at work tells me all the time she wishes she were single so she could go out with me and can't believe I am still single!
And in conclusion, yaddita yaddita yaddita---if you were soooo together, you wouldn't be on here initiating threads about 'biting a bullet and trying mail-order brides'...maybe the reason you're still single is your problem with having a grossly-overinflated opinion of yourself, and a healthy contempt for those who don't swoon when you ask 'don't you think I'm just swell?' But noooo, all those 'broads' want is George or Brad, so if ONE thinks like that, then they ALL must...and that's where you fall on your mug short of the finish line
Its clear that women these days have been conditioned to expect something that is not at all realistic out of men.
And in conclusion, I have my stuff quite together , good job, apartment, car , keep a clean appearance, friendly, just take a look at most of America these days in comparison. A gal at work tells me all the time she wishes she were single so she could go out with me and can't believe I am still single!
The part I underlined and bolded is what I agree with. In fact, I don't even know what they expect these days. Granted, I'm not trying that hard, because I'm not working. So automatically they will think I'm a loser anyway. But once I do find a job, then we'll see. I'd say at that point it will be I don't make enough money, drive the right car, or something else. Anyway, I have all the same qualities you do, but it makes no difference.
Well I ve sure stirred up a hornets nest with this thread! It wasn't my intention but here we are! It seems to me a good many of you who have responded have SERIOUS issues! You are doing a ton of projecting and mis directing anger from your own lives towards me. Thats ok , I dont take it personally!! The women who have replied have only reinforced what I already knew to be true that gals these days (whether its from tv reality shows or playing with Ken & Barbie in their dream doll house) have a laughingly unrealistic view of what their mate should be and reject any and all advances that don't fit into their mold perfectly. When called out on it they go beserk and flail about hurling insults and weak arguments. My good friend 'captain catfish' had a similiar reaction, my theory is his marriage is in trouble and hes trying to convince himself (not me) that she is great and everything is fine!
For the most part I feel sorry for gals these days. Because of this unrealistic expectation most of them will never be happy or find what they are looking for EVER. If it were 20 years ago I'm sure I would be married by now with a family but I'm a victim of timing.
Any hoo I'm off to Thailand in a few and I'd be happy to give a full report when I get back! Hopefully the collective hissy fit will be done by then!
The part I underlined and bolded is what I agree with. In fact, I don't even know what they expect these days. Granted, I'm not trying that hard, because I'm not working. So automatically they will think I'm a loser anyway. But once I do find a job, then we'll see. I'd say at that point it will be I don't make enough money, drive the right car, or something else. Anyway, I have all the same qualities you do, but it makes no difference.
I feel for ya bud. Unfortunately as materialistic as American women are these days even with a job we don't stand much of a chance against their non existent Brad Pitts who are certain to be reading their match.com profile lol!
Thats why I'm getting the bleep out of this hemisphere!
The part I underlined and bolded is what I agree with. In fact, I don't even know what they expect these days. Granted, I'm not trying that hard, because I'm not working. So automatically they will think I'm a loser anyway. But once I do find a job, then we'll see. I'd say at that point it will beI don't make enough money, drive the right car, or something else. Anyway, I have all the same qualities you do, but it makes no difference.
Quote:
Originally Posted by CtownKeith
I feel for ya bud. Unfortunately as materialistic as American women are these days even with a job we don't stand much of a chance against their non existent Brad Pitts who are certain to be reading their match.com profile lol!
Yeah a job doesn't help any you'll just be where I'm at then. Sure I have money to travel and do things it's still not good enough though for these single women around age 28 and up that live in the suburbs. They want a guy with an exact type of job..making at least a certain amount of money or it's no chance brother. You are wrote off instantly. Again I think it's older women that are still single. My brother married like 15 years ago when he was very young and they are still married today.
Well I ve sure stirred up a hornets nest with this thread! It wasn't my intention but here we are! It seems to me a good many of you who have responded have SERIOUS issues! You are doing a ton of projecting and mis directing anger from your own lives towards me. Thats ok , I dont take it personally!! The women who have replied have only reinforced what I already knew to be true that gals these days (whether its from tv reality shows or playing with Ken & Barbie in their dream doll house) have a laughingly unrealistic view of what their mate should be and reject any and all advances that don't fit into their mold perfectly. When called out on it they go beserk and flail about hurling insults and weak arguments. My good friend 'captain catfish' had a similiar reaction, my theory is his marriage is in trouble and hes trying to convince himself (not me) that she is great and everything is fine!
For the most part I feel sorry for gals these days. Because of this unrealistic expectation most of them will never be happy or find what they are looking for EVER. If it were 20 years ago I'm sure I would be married by now with a family but I'm a victim of timing.
Any hoo I'm off to Thailand in a few and I'd be happy to give a full report when I get back! Hopefully the collective hissy fit will be done by then!
They're called women, not 'gals'...and secondly, the women who have replied have only reinforced the notion that they don't need or want a serial crybaby (boohoohoo! Why don't you WANT me? I'm perfect in every way, dammit!) around, when there are other men, with spinal columns firmly in place, who more than fit their criteria...
And by the way, my marriage is just fine, thank you, acknowledged by my wife, who's standing here as I type this and shaking her head, wondering just who the expletive you think you are...marriage is fine and she IS great, and 50 times the woman you'll ever have, either in real life or in your wildest (wet) dream...moving on...
They're only 'weak arguments' and insults because you haven't smelled the coffee and realized that over 800 million people in China and a lot of folk here on CD, don't give a deep-fried rip about you or your sudden lust for non-American women...
So if you're going to Thailand, in search of Subservient Sally Sue, then go...we'll all still be here, in our state of not caring about YOUR hissy-fits, when you get back...you really need to find another station on your radio-of-life, because having it stuck on WLAC (Whine Like A Child) is apparently not getting you anywhere...bon voyage, and keep us posted (heavy sarcasm)
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Angry? Maybe...Misdirected? Not On Your Life
