A new day has dawned. I am free! (loving, younger, family)

[Marlow]

Living with his mama?!?! Ay yi yi--what a piece of work that guy is.

[Marlow]

And he was worried that having to pay spousal support was going to keep him from getting a girlfriend???? Sorry--it's all just so ridiculous.

Keep up the good work, Robyn.

I'm reminded of a story. I had a friend many years ago who told me she had been walking into a convenience store and had seen a guy who looked familiar walking out of it. She racked her brain for a minute and then realized it was her ex-husband! I always thought that was so funny. Obviously, she had moved on. May TJ become such a distant memory for you, Robyn.

[rockky]

ILtheB, You are a very wise woman. Taking the high road is difficult at the time, but there will better results in the future.

Ya do it and then go beat the "H" "E" double toothpicks out of a pillow.

It's too bad that TJ's mom won't allow him to grow up. Oh, well. I guess she needs the control that gives her. I see that as abusive. Wait until she invades his personal space when he wants to play grown up. Ohhhhh! Ugggggly time!

Robyn, I really like your thought processing about your XMIL and the apron. I'm glad you are comfortable and at peace. There will be bumps (don't let him in!), but you will be at a stronger place within yourself to deal with the bumps.

Don't ya just love signing all of those school papers the first couple of days?!? When I got them ready in the classroom to send home with the kids, I joked that I was going to put, "Sign here and include your best chocolate chip cookie recipe". 'Course I never did. That came later.....after we tasted all the different ones that came in for parties.

[I love the Bears]

Thanks for all of the kudos - everyone - it's nice to hear - especially when I turned into the stupidest person on the planet the second our older children hit middle school! My 5 year old still thinks I'm amazing though!
My husband and I have gone through some of the toughest child custody cases - his ex is a piece of work - we had to take her last week and teach her how to measure their 9 year old son's feet - no kidding - he wears a 2 - but she's been buying him a 4 for a whole year because he says they fit!!! We had a court appointed child evaluator testify on the stand that she is not intelligent enough to raise children and she still has custody! The courts are awful and it is all a game - it is so sad to see what it all does to the children!! My ex refuses to go to anger mgmt and lives in his parents bar and has not seen the older children in almost 2 years because I put my foot down after he beat up his 2nd wife. It's all crazy and wild out there - but when I see all 4 of my kids - mine, his and ours sitting at the table eating dinner with us at night and I watch the older ones play hide and seek and help the little ones learn to read and tie their shoes - it makes it all worthwhile.
Have said all of that - I would consider selling my soul for a new couch and a weekend alone with my husband and I would give everything I own to be able to get my 12 year old daughter to shut her mouth and not slam the bedroom door!!!!!

[MsV]

ILtheB, why should your house be any more peaceful than other adolescent's homes? She must be pushing the envelope to see how far you'll let her go. Trust me, this too shall pass...as long as she is respectful, hear her out and then do what you think is best, and let her know that is the best process she can hope for in her home...she'll feel your love and you'll win her respect. It ain't easy being parents of teens.

[I love the Bears]

She's a good girl - I'm not complaining too badly - she has to go to her room to calm down so that she can say whatever she wants in a nice tone!
I tease them - think whatever mean things you want - don't ever say it out loud!!

Robyn - do something nice for yourself this weekend - buy a new robe or even just pink carnations for your bedroom and bathroom! My first "me" move was to buy the pinkest - girly-est (is that a word) sheets I could find!
As soon as you can put photos of you and the kids smiling and happy all over the house - they will love it!!

[Pikantari]

He was mad that I even asked if his mother was living there. This weekend...lots of unpacking to be done. The frames to the beds and the headboards are at my friend Bs house, where I got the bed last night.

It was so nice to see MY couch. It just fit, and finally we had a place to sit. It was something familiar for the kids and they were so excited.

Its a real mess with the bus situation and Lindsay. Her bus is going to be getting home before Alexanders and thatisnot good,. because someone has to get her off the bus. They wont let her off. I am going to have to do an emergency IEP or something toget this straight.

Yep, I guess his mom will finish raising him or something. We were in an arguement this am, not yelling,but I reminded him that I did not want her with my kids alone. UUUGGGHHH. After what the 2 of them did to me.There is no telling with her.

Heusually calls once a night to talk to the kids, and if I need to ask him something, I wait til they are done.

[DareToDream]

Robyn - I may be way out of line here regarding "legalities" and such, but....The whole point of the kids spending the weekend with TJ is so that TJ can spend time with them - not so he can leave them with his mother while he does other things. You and the kids have had to make adjustments and now HE will also have to, if he wants the kids every weekend or at any time for that matter.

How much sooner does Lindsay get home than Alexander? If it's for a short period, is there a neighbor who is home during the day that would be willing to do that?

BTW - of course he was angry that you asked about his mother - you aren't supposed to question anything, only he can (that was sarcasm <g>). If she is, in fact living with him, make sure you put that on your list of things to tell the lawyer, especially in light of that night they tried to haul you away.

Things will all work out. There will be some bumps and possibly hurdles along the way, but you will be fine, as will the children. I don't think TJ is aware of the fact that human mommies are like bear mommies - don't mess with their "babies" or you'll be sorry!

[Madreof3]

Windchimes you are so right, I have a saying, say what you want about me but don't hurt my kids.

Robyn everything will work out, stick to your guns and don't let him see you upset. I know easier said then done.

Good Luck,

T

[Pikantari]

NO UNPACKING WHAT SO EVER!!!

We need a break. At lunch today, we get an hour, I ate a sandwich, 5 mins, the rest of the time, I had my arms and head on the table sound asleep, I think I may have gone over ten mins... no one even came and got me.

Alexanders whole schedule got changed around today at school. he knew that it was going to happen, just not how drastically...LOL But better now, on the 2nd day of school, than down the line.

Lindsay got home before he did, as I knew she would, and the driver took the other kids home and brought her back.

I got a call from my friend Ts dh, he helped move the couch and beds last night. He asked me if I needed any more help tonight getting the headboards and frames. I said thank you but no thank you. he looked so tired last night. He asked if I was sure, and I had gotten another offer when we picked the stuff up, so i will take that up.

He said you dont have a table and chairs do you, Robyn? I said no. He had been through the dining room last night to get to the living room. He said you do now. They are on your front porch.

As soon as I got off the phone w him I was paged to the phone again, it was T. her half day. She said she got on to him for bringing it, she wanted me to have a more colonial type set...LOL I said I am so happy to have anything. She said ok, you can have that til I find what i want you to have, that I know will go with what you like... My mother figure.

Lucy likes it. She sits on one of the chairs as I type. Dinner is almost ready, homework is done, the kids are upstairs in the AC. It is an oak and glass table with upholstered chairs. Works for me. beats the floor any day of the week!

So, my sister is probably coming on Sunday..YAY I havn't seen her in so so long.

I took the trash to the road like a big girl this morning, and all of the boxes I had broken down, and brought the cans up when I came home. The kids said Jim is busting his knuckles to the walls cleaning the house over there...

O TAY....

We are going to bed early tonight...at a reasonable time....all of us in beds. Oh that bed felt so good last night.

I love the House of Chimes. One thing I have noticed though. The kids. They still give me love and hugs and kisses like they did before. Could be that this house is so very much bigger, I dont know, Could be because it is hot down here...but they tend to stay upstairs...in the AC. I think they are taking a break.

My antenna for the tv down here broke during the move, and all you can do is watch dvds and play games, etc. Someone is coming downstairs...gotta live one folks! Lindsay! A kiss, another..a raspberry! And there is the hug.

Geez did she sense it? Running back up the stairs to get her homework to show me. Back down the stairs.

Maybe just the getting used to the changes, new house, new school. Not having to stand to attention, I think has changed them as well, but they are still disciplined... well mannered children.

Shoot....I feel like going up to my room and laying down too! Wont be long.